Lossing it
aseth posted:
I feel like I am living a loosing battle. I give in to most things becuase I do not want to fight about it. And then I feel miserable about it. I debate and convince myself that what is happening is better for my son- he does not need to see so much discord and debate. At other times I feel is it fair to me that I give in and feel humiliated; is it good for my son to see that his mother is "unequal" and humiliated. Will later in life he say; that she did not stand up for me; or that she is a lesserr human being; or will he understand and appreciate or will he decide his mother is confused she gives to one thing but fights for the other. The most difficult is that words are put in my mouth and the things I did not say or mean are implied and i am made to apologise for these. Also I do not know where I stand- one a good day it is treated as a joke and forgotten on a day he is feeling low it is an issue. The latter are somethings we have learnt to identify. But on those days if I give in to everything then i will be giving mixed messages to my son. Sometimes I think I should stand up for what is right but the price for this is so lonely and high that I wonder if it is worth it. I keep telling myself that I should become thick skinned and ignore and I can't. I will slip into depression myself if I continue. Will someone tell him!
sorrylife responded:
always end a conversation with ( your right )....
alaska_mommy responded:
I'm sorry this is how your life is going right now! I hope you are not being harmed physically by this person. Your husband?
Please keep talking to us and let us know how you are. Are you safe? You shouldn't be made to apologize for things you never did. And your son should not have to watch you be humiliated in front of him. No one should have to go through that.
Hugs to you...