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Remembering a little life
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alaska_mommy posted:
Hi all, tomorrow (well, today, since it's after midnight) is the date my little one would have been due. It's a day full of meaning for me, though few know it.
I can't help but be thinking about her today. How my son has a little sister who is not with us. What might have been, had things been different. A tiny sweater knitted with love and anticipation, tucked away unused. That first, and last, ultrasound picture. The positive pregnancy test, the happiness I felt.
I feel sad, although not devastated, I guess 6 months has softened the pain somewhat.
I was really hoping I'd be pregnant again by now...I guess just so I wouldn't feel so empty on this day. But there is still plenty of time for that to happen. And what was lost must be grieved, and can never be replaced. So I guess in a way it's good to remember this day only for what it is, a day to mourn what was lost.
I have a necklace I had made after the miscarriage, hope you guys don't mind me sharing it. I wear it almost every day. I've thought about getting a tattoo, and I still think I would like to, but I'm not sure I want something that permanent. There are days where the necklace feels too heavy and I want to be free of it for a little while. Then other days where I just want it close to my heart. It helps me feel that her memory is honored, that she is not forgotten, and that she is loved always.

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alaska_mommy responded:
Oh I forgot to mention, the necklace is front and back, not two separate necklaces. The birthstones are garnet for January when she died, and peridot for August when she would have been due. I also made a shadow box and a painting in honor of her.
 
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Demons2011 responded:
A-Mom, just thinking of you.
 
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totalyfedup replied to alaska_mommy's response:
Hi a_m, I am thinking of you too and I am sending lots of hugs and a shoulder if you need it. The necklace is so beautiful. I used to watch a certain tattoo show, I am not sure if I can mention the name, I did see quite a few people getting tattoos in memory of someone they lost and they will have that memory for life.
Be kind to yourself today,

tfu
xxx
need support
 
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chez1 replied to alaska_mommy's response:
Hi Joy
Thinking of you and your family today. The necklace is beautiful, a lovely keepsake.
Keep well and stay strong.
Lots of Hugs
Chez x
People often say that motivation doesn't last. Well, neither does bathing - that's why we recommend it daily....... Zig Ziglar
 
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alaska_mommy responded:
Thanks D.

tfu, thank you, yes you can mention the name if you like, I don't think there's anything wrong with mentioning brand names or TV shows or medications or things like that. I think the only things they discourage is us giving our phone numbers, email, and addresses for our own safety. Other than that, it's all up for grabs.
I really think it would be neat to have a tattoo, most likely near my heart, to remember my little one. At the moment it doesn't matter anyway since we don't have the money. But maybe at some point in the future.

C, thanks for thinking of me. I wonder how you're doing? I've seen you posting a lot of support, and I'm hoping that means you're feeling good.
 
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Demons2011 replied to alaska_mommy's response:
A-Mom, I think the tattoo is a sweet and loving idea to keep your lost child close to your heart. I know she(?) is there already. I now know that best memorial is to keep going with your life.

Besides, the only tattoo I would ever want would want is a mistletoe. Placement would be a major key.
 
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chez1 responded:
Hey Joy
How are you doing today?
Hugs
Chez x
People often say that motivation doesn't last. Well, neither does bathing - that's why we recommend it daily....... Zig Ziglar
 
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MyRain responded:
Hi AM,
I'm sorry I can't see the necklace (it's probably a computer issue on my end). I am thinking of you and I'm so glad that you are able to process this with us and that you feel like the pain is slowly beginning to fade.
Hugs to you.
 
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alaska_mommy replied to Demons2011's response:
D, I'm laughing at what you might be saying about placement of mistletoe. I'm hoping it wouldn't be someplace too painful.

I'm not sure if it was a girl, it was too soon to tell the gender. But my mom and sis both felt it was a girl and I had hoped it was a girl. So I went with girl in my heart.

Chez, doing good today, thank you! I actually got some decent sleep last night. Amazing what that will do for a body. Feeling pretty positive and might even get some cleaning done today for when my sister in law comes later this week.

Hi MyRain! Great to see you again. No worries on the image. What you could try doing if you want to see it is right click the image, click on "view image info" and there should be a photobucket link to it.
 
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Demons2011 replied to alaska_mommy's response:
A-Mom, perhaps I wasn't descriptive enough, a clue of cheeky would have given the location away.
 
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alaska_mommy replied to Demons2011's response:
Ah, that sounds much less painful! lol.
 
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alaska_mommy replied to alaska_mommy's response:
I feel I should apologize for my much-too-active imagination! I think it's gotten me in trouble this time!
 
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BeHapppy118 responded:
Aww, thank you for sharing this with us. I think the necklace is beautiful. I am glad that the pain has lessened for you. It's one of those moments where the pain won't go away but it will fade.

Thinking of you, hope that you are doing ok.
So, this is my life. And I want you to know that I am both happy and sad and I'm still trying to figure out how that could be.
- Stephen Chbosky
 
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alaska_mommy replied to BeHapppy118's response:
Hi BH, thanks, yeah I'm doing pretty well last couple of days. I feel like I've been sleeping better and so have a bit better energy during the day. I'm not sure why, I did just start a new B vitamin supplement, called Super B Complex, but not sure if it's related to that. Either way it's nice!
How are you feeling?


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