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What do i do?
An_247776 posted:
Long story short, my boyfriend and I got into an argument. My personality is the time to shut down and not want to talk to anyone until I just get over it. I feel that im keeping quiet to prevent me lashing out at others not involved. Well, his family had tried to communicate with me after the argument, but I just did not want to talk. I continued to give one word responses to thier questions. Later on, my boyfriend confronts me and wants to break up because i was disrespecting his family. he doesnt understand why I couldnt have just put on a show. How do i explain to him that I did not intentionally dispreaspect them. I just can not hide my emotions. Also, where do I seek help to control this error in my personality? I want to be sociable and less angry, I just can not control my behavior at times.
Anon_175177 responded:
You should seek therapy or your relationship will not hold up as well as any others. Good luck.
alaska_mommy responded:
I think it's better to be quiet than to lash out at someone and be hurtful. That can leave way bigger scars.
You could always try writing or emailing your bf or his family to explain, that way you can think through what you want to say and aren't cornered into a conversation.
It probably would be good to get some counseling if you have a problem with being angry often.
Talk to your bf and explain what you said here about not wanting to lash out. My husband does the same thing, it bugs me sometimes cause I just want him to communicate with me when we're having an argument! But he would rather not be hurtful, which I think is admirable. Good luck.
itmatsb replied to alaska_mommy's response:
What a great idea from alaska_mommy to write something to let people know what was going on with you. Otherwise his family will think that you are very unfriendly. And also good to talk to your bf about your objective to not lash out.

But if you want to be less angry and to be able to control your behavior better, then you really should see a counselor. Many people have anger management problems, if that's even what your problem is. Whatever it is, a therapist should be able to help you. Hope that your bf doesn't break up with you without giving you a chance to get better. Good luck.
Demons2011 replied to itmatsb's response:
Great idea A-Mom. At least in writing it out, the anger can be removed or greatly toned down before sending. How are you feeling?

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