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    Unwanted
    avatar
    Sasa2676 posted:
    Im sure I'm not the first one to say that I feel unwanted in life. I try to look at the positives but the feeling out weighs everything. I have become a nuisance to everyone around me it seems. I can't afford counseling or medication due to no insurance. I have spoken to some of few people I trust and they can't understand how I feel. Since my separation and eventual divorce I can't establish relationships. I either get used or ignored entirely. My friends would say that it's the man's loss but I always feel like the loser or just damaged goods. I've been battling depression for 25 years and attempted suicide more than once. I try to look on the bright side but it's hard to with debt, no job, and trying to go to school. I always wondered if anyone would care if I was gone. Maybe my children will but I doubt others. I don't know what to do anymore.
    Reply
     
    avatar
    itmatsb responded:
    You know that with you being gone it would absolutely devastate your children for life. You are severely depressed and need help. Perhaps you would be eligible to apply for Medicaid for your medical needs, e.g. medication, counseling, doctor appts. Or can your family help with at least some medication? There are programs which the pharmacy should know about that can provide medications at a very low cost. Medication and counseling may be available at a very low cost or free through either United Way or your local health dept. Regarding counseling, most schools have counselors to help you.

    Does your attorney handling your divorce have any suggestions for your financial situation? Your spouse will be forced to pay you some monthly money once you are divorced if you are the one with the kids living with you and also to you personally if your spouse makes more than you do, which it sounds like that is the case with you.

    You have much to have grief about with your marriage breaking up. I wouldn't be wanting to get into another relationship right away to replace your spouse. It's not likely to work out and you have a lot of other things to focus on right now--especially your children who are also facing a big loss.

    If school is too much for you right now, I would talk to the school about getting out. Your mental health, your children and finances are more important. Again, seek out a counselor at your school.

    From you mentioning that you have battled depression for 25 years, it sounds like you need a better psychiatrist to help you. There are combinations of medications that could help you. Or ECT has changed greatly and does help people.

    You will feel better with some help. Let me know what help you are able to get. Wish you the best.
     
    avatar
    susiemargaret responded:
    hello, S --

    i am so sorry that i didn't see your post until today, and i hope you are still following this thread.

    we have a list of resources for finding free/low-cost medical care, including counseling, at http://forums.webmd.com/3/depression-exchange/forum/6522 (first and tenth posts). see if any of those sites might be able to help you.

    i also have a list of resources for finding free/low-cost meds that i will post if you write back and ask for it (too long to include here).

    i hope this helps and that things start to improve for you. i send caring thoughts; please keep us posted on how you are doing.

    -- susie margaret
    what good is gold, or silver too, if your heart's not good and true -- hank williams, sr.


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