Depression Community

Hi, My retired military husband is very depressed. He doesn't want to do anything at all. No housework, yard work, no laundry, has no friends, no hobbies. He sleeps between 10-15 hours daily. He gets up to go to his part time job and comes home to go to bed. He wakes up in time to go to work again. If he doesn't work, then he sleeps in. He is seeing a a physiacrist and is on medication. They have tried to adjust the dosages and different other meds. He took a second part time job earlier this year. I said I would help him learn the functions. That was February. It's October and he doesn't retain any knowledge at all. Each time we go into the office, I have to re-explain the entire process to him. He acts like it is completely new to him each time. He doesn't take notes and doesn't remember what I tell him. It takes him 1 1/2 hours to do a couple of steps where it would take an average person to do in ten minutes. He watches TV in his free time, shows like the Military Channel, war shows, gory horror movies and the like. I suspect that he may have a drug problem too. He is prescribed codeine for restless legs. The script is for 1 month's supply (60 tablets). The prescription will only last about 10-14 days. He marks his calendar when to call the MD for a new prescription. During this 2 week time frame at the beginning of the prescription, he is incoherrent, falls asleep while eating dinner, is confused and exhausted. When the codeine supply runs out, he is awful, rude and very snappish. After 4/5 days, he then returns back to normal. Only to start this cycle again with the new prescription. I hide whatever pain meds that my doctor prescribes me for RA pain, because I found that he was helping himself to my meds. Not only do I have RA, I am also recovering from open heart surgery. I can't pace myself or properly take care of me when he is like this. I feel like he is dragging me down. Lately, I find myself feeling overwhelmed and thinking that I am dying. I feel isolated and exhausted. I do see a therapist for myself (I have seen her for years due to chronic depression and on meds). I feel like my days never end and I don't get any help from him. I hurt not only for him, but I am afraid that I may be also heading into a depression too. What to do?