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I can't stop crying
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beautifulbuffalo posted:
I've gone from working at a pretigious job for 21 years and now I'm on disability babysitting for my grandson of 14 months. I just don't know what to do with myself. I can write because he is sleeping,. But all I've done is cry today. I don't have a vehicle because my daughter is using it for work. Don't have any money to go anyplace anyway. I don't know how long it takes to receive a first check but it's been 7 weeks. I don't know I just don't know. There is no life for me.
BB
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Haylen_WebMD_Staff responded:
I'm so sorry BB!!!! (((hugs))) to you!

I would suggest taking ANY small, tiny step that can make you feel better. Do you have a stroller? Perhaps you can take the baby around the block and collect some fall leaves? Maybe do some super deep breaths and some easy stretches? A jumping jack?

Can you give a call to the disability office for your city/state to check on your disability payment? I know it takes a while for the first check to come in but 7 weeks sounds excessive. Just finding that out might give you some peace of mind.

Please keep checking back in - and give that grandson a big hug - his love for grandma is unconditional!

H
 
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beautifulbuffalo replied to Haylen_WebMD_Staff's response:
I love my grandson to death. I think it doesn't help that my husband has been so busy he doesn't have time for me. He leaves at 6am and comes home at 6pm. Has dinner and showers and ready for bed.

I'm just feeling so lonely. Baby steps is what I need it is just taking that first step. I live in the adirondacks and we have snow, but I could bundle him up if I can get myself going myself. I have so many knots in my stomach. I don't have any friends.

I ask is there still a life out there for me. I Love my grandson but I don't want to babysit for him forever. I have my Dr. appts which I can only do on Mondays because that is my daughters day off., I guess I just feel like I don't have a life.
BB
 
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beautifulbuffalo replied to beautifulbuffalo's response:
Let me just add that my daughter is in the middle of a divorce and can't afford daycare and that is why I'm babysitting for her.
BB
 
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lexismom11 replied to beautifulbuffalo's response:
Make sure your daughter understands that you babysitting cannot be a permanent thing. There is a reason why you are not working right now and you don't want to over do it. What do you and your husband do on weekends? Maybe that is the time to be together alone and just do something you find enjoyable.
 
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beautifulbuffalo replied to lexismom11's response:
That's just it, I don't find anything enjoyable. I'm your true plain Jane. I don't even have any hobbies. I think things will be better when she can afford her own car. This is why I'm babysitting so she can save money to buy a car and pay for her insurance. If she put him in daycare right now it would take her paycheck. She is a hairdresser and doesn't make much money. I have to get my depression under control and that is number one..Then I have to start physical therapy for tendinitis in my shoulder. Mean time all you friends give me a push.
BB
 
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Haylen_WebMD_Staff replied to beautifulbuffalo's response:
I hope you have some non-stressful plans this weekend! Please do keep trying to find something you enjoy - at the library, a museum, a class - anything at all that you can look forward to. The local arts and crafts store and home depot frequently have free demonstrations or hands-on workshops that might get you interested in something new.

It's so nice of you to watch your grandson - daycare and babysitters are so expensive, it's often hard to find a job that can pay for that and still leave $$$ left over to live!

(((hugs)))

H
 
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Thomas L Schwartz, MD responded:
Can you seek treatment? Perhaps ask your generalmdoc for referral to a therapist or start a medicine if he or she thinks it is warranted. You are suffering and the are some treatments that can help
 
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beautifulbuffalo replied to lexismom11's response:
She understands somewhat but she is into herself. She is having a babysitter on her short day Wednesday. So that will give me a break in the middle of the week. I still won't have a car until she gets her own.
 
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beautifulbuffalo replied to Haylen_WebMD_Staff's response:
I live in the country nowhere near anything so with no car I can't do anything.

That is what I am trying to do save her some money.
 
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beautifulbuffalo replied to Thomas L Schwartz, MD's response:
I do seek therapy. Have been for 15 years.. I take all different kinds of medicine.
 
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lexismom11 replied to beautifulbuffalo's response:
How long is that going to take? Hopefully not that long because you might go crazy with too much time and nothing you can do about it. She has to understand that you cannot live like that forever. It'll be nice to have that day to yourself in the middle of the week. You won't have to worry about taking care of him for the one day.
 
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beautifulbuffalo replied to lexismom11's response:
Well that one day didn't work out. The daycare doesn't watch kids past 5:30 and she wouldn't get there until 6:30. So I'm back to watching him from Tuesday-Saturday. I figure when she gets a car I'm going to ask her to try it again and I will pick him up. I've been in so much pain lately lifting him that it keeps me from sleeping. I have tendinitis in both shoulders. Oh well what to do.
BB


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