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hopeless to know what else to do?
hopeless2013 posted:
hate living a lie pretending to be happy and noraml all the time. I have delat with depression for so long i have a hard time fighting to get better anymore now at age 29 i feel like most of my life i 've been dealing with the since i was 12. i like a lifetime has gone by trying to fight and i'm only 29. I feel like why should i want to continue when at 30, 40, 50 or older i will have to still deal with the pain. i'm not happy anymore and have no interest in anything. If it weren't for my mom and my husband and my faith in god. I probably would of killed myself but i don't cause i know the pain of that wou;d hurt them to be without me. I don't know what to do i try med after med and nothing works. I don't know if i should see a therpist for talk therpy . I have in the past but have a hard time with that i ffel i can't be competley honest on how i feel cause i afriad of being judged for how i feel and think. that I may be seen as not normal and be commited . i don't know if what i'm saying is making anysense i kind of rambelingand just writing what i feel. i could reaaly use some advise cause i don't know what to do anymore.
wannatalk65 responded:
I have been and still am in your shoes. What I have to work is to make two columns on a piece of paper, One side write down Anger, Depression, sadness, guilt, etc. the other explanations of why. Write down everyday of why you feel like this. You can read my profile. I have written a lot down. Then absolutely see a therapist. Show them your papers, believe me you are not being judged if you are not doing anything wrong. Then try to find a hobby? Something you like doing. Like walks for example. Maybe find a nice place to sit for an hour or two, and just write by yourself, a park, a beach.
hopeless2013 replied to wannatalk65's response:
thanks for the advice, I really appreciate it.
itmatsb responded:
So sorry to hear about your chronic depression. You can't really get anything out of the therapy if you're not willing to be honest about yourself. Everything that you tell your therapist is confidential. They have most likely heard it all. Also feel free to share your thoughts on this site which is completely confidential.

You say that you have tried a lot of meds. But I bet that you haven't tried an MAO Inhibitor such as Nardil because most doctors don't want to prescribe it because there are food restrictions. But taking that med made me happier than I've ever been in my life. It was only after I developed a bad side effect 3 years later that I had to stop it. What a big disappointment. Let me know if you have taken it and if not why not ask for it if you've tried everything else.

Also do you see a good psychiatrist who can prescribe mixtures of medications for depression? If not, get an appt with a psychiatrist. Tell them what you wrote above.

There has to be an answer for you. Hold on until you find it. And with depression being such a common problem with millions of people needing the medication, the drug manufacturers are always looking for new anti-depressants which may be your answer. Wish you the best.

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