Trying to Build A Support System
GSimp posted:
I am usually known as a very outgoing person. Very lovable, very happy, life of the party....that is until recently.

For the last few months I have been battling depression alone. I always felt like I could get better if I just tried hard enough. Obviously this has not been successful. I do journal & write. I also try to use my boyfriend as part of an outlet as well.

I am currently trying to build up various outlets for support in addition to therapy or calling a crisis hotline. I want people who can give honest opions or views even if it's just asking questions to help probe me to get to the right answer. Unfortunately I don't get this on the hotlines.

My depression has also been accompanied by drinking almost everyday. I've become very angry and hard to be around. Drinking basically relaxes me but if something says or does something that I don't like, I explode. I don't like this person that I have become. I just want to be happy again.
GSimp replied to chez1's response:
Thank you so much for your response and sharing your story with me. I'm glad that you mentioned family and friends. I tried to give an overview of what's going on without being specific as to what is causing my depression or ocassional suicidal thoughts. I actually don't want to share that with people other than Dr's, psychologists, etc and my family actually became upset with me. My Mom said that she is angry with me that I can't share with her but wasn't really understanding to the fact that I'm seeking professional treatment and just don't feel comfortable in speaking with my family about my deepest, darkest secrets. Any suggestions?