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beachmama38 posted:
looking for supporters? I'm married with kids still at home and in a marriage that has absolutly no communication or understanding of how i feel or need.
patience1965 responded:
I'm pretty much in the same boat. My husband is trying but truly does not understand. My 16 yr old son can't even compliment me on a meal, one I fix especially for his birthday every year. His response today, Mom what's wrong with this, it's runny. I've been crying all day, don't know why. He knows this. No understanding there. I even gave him a printout of what Clinical Major Depression is, he said in his superior manner "I know what it is". Yeah right. My husband says that even thought part of the major symptoms is excessive sleeping, he said that that meant people maybe slept till noon. Not stayed in bed all day. Keep writing, this is my first day on here and I just feel better connecting to people who understand
beachmama38 replied to patience1965's response:
For some reason my post, posted twice. and now have to responders. I've tried explaining to my husband too, to no avail he is lost in how to handle it i think or what his part is supposed to be. I don't want to tell him what i want or need from him, he should know these things! if I have to tell him what i need or what to do then what does that mean to me? I'm in my own relationship, right? I too have a 16 yr old son and he pretty much acts the same way. my younger child is so influenced by the neighbors family she tries their shannigans here at home which in turn makes me loose control, yell and say things i don't want too. which i know will destroy our realtionship in time. trust me i know the dream we all have for ourselves is never what reality truely is. but we should have some control
wantshappy responded:
I know how you feel, It's like they make us feel that we have control over it and we could fix it if we wanted to, Someone once said it's mind over matter. They've never felt like the weight of the world was crushing them. All I ever hear from my live in boyfriend is that he just wants me to be happy and to fix myself and love myself and them we can all be happy. And that he can't get to involved because it will make him sad and in a bad mood. He's doesn't understand Why my moods are all over the place and that the tinniest thing could make me feel that my whole world just fell apart.
patience1965 replied to beachmama38's response:
I have learned that I do need to tell him. Let's face it 99% of men can't comprehend anything that has to do with emotions. I am still trying to make my husband understand that it's a chemical imbalance, because he keeps saying "why can't you just THINK your way out of it!" What? How ignorant is that? I have printed the pages from WebMD that describe the symptoms and give some reasons for what we are going through, and it did help some. But my husband needs to hear things 100 times (not exaggerating!) before he gets it. So print off some simple stuff from this website, you need to take baby steps with men, or else they'll just blame it on hormones. And if your going to a doctor have him go with you for your next visit and have him hear it from the horses mouth.
Believe me trying to bring him into the loop is the best thing. I'll continue to look for your reply's.
patience1965 replied to wantshappy's response:
Oh that is soooo true!!! I spent all of Monday sobbing, I don't know why, and my husband kept yelling at me "well why are you crying" Well, if I knew that I wouldn't be crying! The next day, one thing happened after another, car broke, couldn't find my reading glasses, dog pooped in the house (he is going to have to be put down soon), I had been to the grocery store at 7 A.M. so I could still get the groceries put away and make it to work on time. Plus get the dinner in the crock pot, get our son off to school, make my lunch, eat breakfast, and if I have the time take a shower. Did I receive any help? Just guess, first one doesn't count. Then he wanders around the house whining because he doesn't feel well. Then when I call him after the car breaks down and am sobbing, he yells at me for crying. I'm going down fast, and I have absolutely NO support.

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