I was recently diagnosed as Type 1. Last February to be exact. After spending most my life sick and asking doctors to test my A1C. All of my family is diabetic.
At first I followed a strict diet, started working out, followed all the rules. However, I found myself feeling sorry for myself and very angry. I had several other health issues and personal issues happening.
I have even been in the hospital for DKA and on my death bed.
I am finding it hard to get back to were I was at the beginning. Even though I have promised my family that I am taking care of myself. I'm not.
I know all the health risks, I know I am putting myself in danger... I just wish I could get over this anger. I wonder if I am only person who gets annoyed and irritated with people asking me where my blood sugar is and for no reason. Even after telling the person that my blood sugar is my personal business they continue and even threaten to take my meter and look. I feel very alone. Even with a family who is all diabetic they seem to forget what it was like getting the news....
Anne, many of us have passed through various stages of resentment, shock and anger. Why did it have to happen to me? What did I do to deserve this? Well, if everyone in your family is diabetic, the answer is self-evident: your affliction is genetically based (so is mine) and there's nothing you can do to change your genes (at least not yet). However, instead of dwelling on the negative, just focus all of your energies on improving your own personal health. That should be your primary goal. Keep written logs of your food intake, activity/exercise levels, nutritional supplements taken, and maintain accurate notes of the resulting effects on your blood sugar levels as well as on your overall health (i.e., your feelings of well-being or lack thereof). This will enable you to analyze your log objectively on an ongoing, continuous basis so that you can associate your successes (and failures) with various actions or factors in your life.
Dwelling on negative emotions will only damage your health further because it isn't just the food that you consume that will affect your blood glucose levels, it is your emotional state as well. It is well established that stress and inflammation play major roles in elevating BG levels. Loneliness (click to read the UPI article ) boosts inflammation which will compromise your BG control efforts and, of course, is linked to coronary heart disease. Knowing all of this from an academic perspective alone won't improve your situation. You have to throw caution to the wind and make a personal commitment to separate the little things in life from the ones that really matter. Knowing what's important while overlooking or dismissing the things that aren't can go a long way towards bringing inner peace to one's self.
I used to get a bit annoyed at relatives and close friends asking me constantly about my BG levels. But then I realized they were asking out of genuine concern and not to be meddlesome. So I began turning it into a private/personal game by attempting to predict my BG levels prior to actually measuring it with my BG testing meter. By honing the ability to "listen to my body," I can now predict my blood sugar levels within twenty points of the measured one almost ninety percent of the time. I can often "feel" when I am in "the zone" (my personal target is 65 to 85).
Rest assured that you are not alone. There are thousands of diabetics in a similar predicament but YOU are the only one who can change your attitude and personal outlook on life. In the proverbial half cup of coffee, a pessimist would say that "it is half empty" but an optimist would say "it is half full." On the other hand, I tend to side with the minority that would say that the cup is just oversized for its contents. Set a goal to improve your health and cast aside anything that won't help you meet those goals. Uncontrolled diabetes can be an insidious and nasty disease but it is also virtually 100 percent controllable if the proper efforts and time is invested. Yes, I do consider it to be an investment, one that will pay back many rewarding dividends in the future.
Nutrijoy, I like your advice.This is great. We are the only persons to treat it with our own management with ofcourse guidance from health care specialists and workers. I like your positive mindedness. Keep it up. By Manage for Life
I once asked a business acquaintance, the General Manager of a mid sized business, the following question...
Me:"Do you have people under your employ making decisions on behalf of your company?"
GM: "Of course."
Me: "Do you think the state of their health can affect their decision making, ie.,What they decide what's best for the business?...What improvements are possible?...Who's the best candidates to work for your company?, etc, etc..."
GM: "Maybe...I guess...........What the hell difference does it make (since that's out of my control)?"
The point I'm making is simple. People acknowledge that the state of their health (weight, blood sugar, blood pressure, cholesterol levels, etc) can affect how they feel. But, they seldom draw the correlation between how they feel and the decisions they make.
My question to you is, do you think you would feel anger if you were in better health? If the answer is "yes", do you think excellent health is within the grasp of Type 1 Diabetics? If the answer is "yes", do you think it's within your grasp?
You asked the question, "Does anyone else feel the same way?..."
My answer to you is most definitely!It all depends on how you feel...
No I don't get angered or irritated when people ask me how my sugar is, because I DID something about my diabetes. I put it in remission. I did not want it - it runs in my family as well - so I TOOK charge and turned it around. I CARE about my life and want to live without the consequences.
People can ask me all they want and I will tell them I am good and can prove it with my meter.
No one can help you if you don't want the help. You should only be getting mad at the diabetes and do something about it not get mad at the people who seem to want to help you. Of course this only my opinion.
I shall wait upon the Lord and renew my strength. Come follow my life's journey at: www.mybearyspecial.blogspot.com
Thank you all for responding. It helps to know that at some point we have all had our own frustrations. I know that my life could be much worse. I just need to find my positivity again. I am thinking about trying an insulin pump... has anyone tried it or is currently using one?
I have been diagnosed with quite a few things in the past month. Type 2 diabetes, PCOS, infertility, have a hearing aid on it's way, the list goes on. But, I still know the cup is half full and that I can overcome these things when I put my mind to it. I am determined to be a survivor!!!!
Do I know how you feel .......HELL YES.Nutrijoy is spot on and so are you.You have to deal with all aspects when you deal with a disease like this.Family/friends are there to be nosey and of course the natural reaction is to go into defense mode,close doors,become a hermit.I'm the only one in my family going back 60some years that has it,so of course with me I was like WHY ME?,WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE THIS?My brother(older)was the jerk,did drugs,skip school,got poor grades why not him(my attitude towards my brother has since changed)plus I would now never wish this on anyone even my worst enemy).Since I was a driver(the only one with a perfect driving record I might add)and was responsible for upto 4 people at some times as well as many more on the road,I had a simple vow anyone who wanted to know my BSL if I was driving just ask and I would show you right there.This I found helped two fold (if not more)it reassured all passengers that I was ok and a reference point if something went"wrong"later(i.e. low blood sugar("well at 2pm he was at 147 he showed me on his meter" and its 4:30 now he's at 46).I admit I'm terrible at controlling my BSL that was the title of my first blog,type 1 diabetic for 17 yrs and still cant control it.Like all of us we have good days and bad(for some its weeks,months,years good for them(I'm stickin my tongue out for the people that are good,envious hhhmph)but we keep fighting.I have been depressed(still am)about it but I know the reason why my friends are nosey is because they CARE.Sure its intrusive but look at the other side of the coin,what if they didnt ask.My friends who I live with(they wont let me live on my own)they have"saved me" countless times 22 low BSL(since June)and countless seizures(there's nothing like waking up with a iv in your arm garbled radio transmission"42yr old male unresponsive"soaked with sweat paramedics over you asking the same-ole-questions"do you know where you are""do you know your name")I feel I let everyone down,friends have to miss work or sleep,firetrucks and paramedics blocking the street,nieghbors all out inquiring whats going on,so my mission is to get to the point(and stay there)where I dont give them a reason to ask only if in casual conversation.One of the things I like about these blogs is there is always someone worse than you ( not that,thats a good thing)(feel sorry for that person if they're worse than ME,YIKES)or can relate with you on topics and you can give feedback or read others.I'm not half full or half empty...I'm the get a cup that fits I'll do the extra dishes person.Cause I'm a bubblegum chewing,a@@kicker and I'm all outta bubblegum.So watch out diabetes I'm coming for ya.Good luck to you.Digm70
Dizzyanne, Unlike you, I am a T2. Does one get angry or feel lonely with late onset diabetes-hell yes. At the same time though it is like many here, they use the anger to take positive steps to control or in the case of T2 beat the diabetes.
In my case, since I don't have a family history, or was not overweight, I did not get much in the way of support from my family other than my wife. They all believed I could not be diabetic because no one else was. Even now, it is often worse, as I control my numbers with no meds, just diet and exercise. How can I be diabetic if I don't have to take medication! It can be lonely, but use your anger and your loneliness to take positive steps, and realize no matter what anyone else thinks, you are the only one responsible for your health. The decisions you make, the actions you take will define how you will survive. I was once told by a wise person that the heroes in life were not the ones that did not have something to overcome, but the ones that overcame and excelled in the struggle, rising above all else.
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