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    BelaFaccia posted:
    Hey Everyone,

    Boy oh boy when I fall off the wagon, I fall HARD. Gained back all the weight that I lost...AGAIN. Started eating poorly...AGAIN. Stopped going to the gym...AGAIN. I'm trying not to beat myself up over it because all that I am doing by doing that is setting myself up for failure.

    I work at a traumatic brain injury day program. And I know I shouldn't take this to heart, but one of the clients today called to me from down the hall saying, "Well look at this girl, she's got a wide A$$". Needless to say, that made me feel pretty crummy, discouraged, and defeated. It kills me to think that I would have stuck to things, I would have the strong, healthy, energetic, bikini body that I have been wanting for so long, and I let life get in the way...again.

    But, we're heading into the end of May now, and maybe I can get close to where I want to be by the end up July (a 20lb. loss would make me as happy as a clam in high tide). But part of me doesn't even want to try because I'm afraid of failing...again.

    Anyone have any words of wisdom? Suggestions? I'll take anything at this point!

    BLT2587 responded:
    Hey BelaFaccia,
    I'm so sorry for how your feeling, I've definitely been there before.. over and over again. I definitely need some back up and a lot of encouragement in order to stick with any program I start. Im just trying to drink a lot of water and try and cut out most of my eating out.. :( I have to start little even though I want fast results..
    I'm 24 5'5 and 190lbs
    my goal is 150-160
    my goal for end of summer (maybe let me get a lil swimming in) is 170
    I'm definitely up to encouraging each other through this tough painful struggle.. :)

    Good Luck to you!
    Tomato05 responded:
    Try not to fret too much about your past mishaps. It's never too late to get really going with weight loss, no matter what has happened before.

    My advice would be not to set that 20lb goal for end of July. Noble as goals are in principle, they also add a lot of pressure and not meeting them can make one despair and feel downhearted. Especially if they are very ambitious like yours.

    Rather just make your goal to lose - even if it is 1/2 pound a week. Some weeks you may not lose much, but as long as the overall trend is down - that is all that matters. It doesn't matter if it takes you 25 weeks to lose the 20lb; as long as you lose it eventually.

    Weight loss should never be rushed. TOO FAST AND IT WON'T LAST.
    jean4u responded:
    Aim for better everyday rather than perfect right away.

    Good to see you back. BTW people will comment that you are a "Miss Skinny", too when you lose, just do it for the best you, you can be.

    BelaFaccia replied to jean4u's response:
    BLT, I'll be right there with you! I think that good support plays an important role in the journey toward weight loss. I'm 24, 5'0", and I'm guessing back up to 160 lbs. I'm afraid to step on the scale after my 3 month hiatus. I would LOVE to get down to 130. That is my ultimate goal. I don't care if it takes me a year to get there! Tomato, I know that it needs to come off slow to keep it off. Anymore than 2 lbs. per week is risky. But even though I know that logically, it is really hard for me to stay patient! I think that played a major role in not sticking my routine...that along with stress and exhaustion due to my fibromyalgia and being overworked. As far as making goals...I'm one for mini goals. Like "I will go to the gym 3 times this week" or if I am having a stressful week and need to take things one day at a time "i won't eat any junk at the team meeting" or "i won't snack on junk when I get home from work". Jean, although someone insulting me is my initial motivation for jumping back on the wagon, my reasons for wanting to get this weight off have always been for me...mostly. My fibromyalgia has become more difficult for me to maintain since I have gained this extra weight. I'm also going to be 25 in September and I know that once you hit 30, your metabolism slows. I want to make sure I can get myself into good shape so it will be easier for me to maintain as I get older. But I hope you're right Jean...that sometime soon, I'll be called "Miss Skinny"! -Nicole
    BelaFaccia replied to BelaFaccia's response:
    Oh! And I forgot to add that I am food journaling and I walked for an hour today! I need to calculate the distance in my car tomorrow, LOL. Going to estimate that it was about 2 miles though.
    Tomato05 replied to BelaFaccia's response:
    2 miles is a good walk; keep it up and speed it up as you get fitter! Or seek out a nice hilly route...

    I think it is a good thing that you set mini-goals like that. They can make you feel that you are making progress at least. That's how I got fit (running) : through mini-mini-mini goals! In the beginning stages I would literally try to run 1 minute more every week! Some people would have laughed at such ridiculous improvements, but I can now run a good couple of miles...

    Mini goals are better than one enormous overwhelming end-goal.
    jean4u replied to BelaFaccia's response:

    Sounds like you are making plans to make your life healthier. I had to break my yo-yo dieting ways. I really was doubtful that I could ever change.

    When I came here in Jan., 2010, I knew I had to make it a lifestyle change or I would just put the pounds back on. Even knowing that didn't make it any easier. I actually lost the weight slower than in the past because I was learning to eat healthy, increase exercise and drink 64 oz of water. Some days I fell back to old ways and put the pounds back on, but I came here for support and venting.

    Don't forget to snack healthy, too. That is really important.

    I find that regular posting really keeps me on focus, too. Especially when I was having the bumpy times. Board buddies would throw me a life-line with a tip to get me back on track. There will be times when life throws you a curve and we reach for comfort foods. I bought me an air popcorn maker and eat 3 cups and a Crystal Light.

    Good luck!

    You can do this!!!

    jean4u replied to Tomato05's response:

    What you say about really small goals is so true. I could only do 15 min. on the elliptical, but now I can and do, do 1 hour with no problem. Most days, I try to get in an additional hour of some activity.

    The same with eating healthier, that did not change overnight.

    What I have learned, most recently, the importance of healthy snacking. In my past yo-yo-days, I would "save" my calories and eat them ALL at dinner and after dinner. No wonder I would re-pound!


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