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Day 9/Happy Halloween
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Mandy29 posted:
My aunt wanted some peanut butter cookies. After they were made, she asked, "Don't you want one." When I said, "No, Thank you." She said, "Why not?" in such a tone as to indicate that she was highly offended by my not eating one. I told her, "I'm trying to lose weight. I can't eat any and everything I want. I don't want to look like this a year from now." She let it go.
They keep all sorts of sweet treats here on hand. The first thing I did when I first started staying here to help out about five weeks ago was relocated all of the junky foods i.e. chips, candy bars, Donut Sticks and other sweets to the pantry from the table in the breakfast nook which is in full view of the living room. (out of sight, out of mind)
SW-265 GW-185
The minute you settle for less than you deserve, you get even less than you settled for.
- Maureen Dowd
Reply
 
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blondie454u responded:
Great job on the will power to say no! I know it's hard to be like that but they will get used to it.
Amber CW 135 maintaining, SW 250. Stress is nothing more than a socially acceptable form of a mental illness.
 
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rohvannyn responded:
Good job saying no! Protecting your health and your best interests is a great skill to perfect. It's a good thing to keep junk out of sight, I completely agree with you. Maybe try the opposite too-- like a bowl of brightly colored fruit in the middle of a table, to tempt you into eating that when you have the nibbles. We've done that in our home and it's a great decoration as well as keeping the good food IN sight. It's tough keeping on track when you are a caregiver but ultimately if you keep at it, you will be stronger for it and less succeptible to temptation. And if you do give in once, it doesn't mean you have to give up.

Happy Halloween!
Roh SW 220ish and fluffy CW 178.0 GW 140ish and buff

'Your focus determines your reality.' -QGJ

'Try not. Only do.' --Y
 
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Mandy29 replied to blondie454u's response:
Thank you
SW-265 GW-185
The minute you settle for less than you deserve, you get even less than you settled for.
- Maureen Dowd
 
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Mandy29 replied to rohvannyn's response:
Thank you I actually did do the thing with the fruit. We've run out of fresh fruit. It's almost time for me to go grocery shopping.

I'm hoping that over the next three to six weeks that their health will improve and I will be able to go home for good

Happy Halloween to you as well
SW-265 GW-185
The minute you settle for less than you deserve, you get even less than you settled for.
- Maureen Dowd
 
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totallywiggedout responded:
The thing is, about the offense taken, misery loves company. Most eaters are also FEEDERS. We like everyone to eat like we do when we are big because it makes us not seem too overindulgent.
But if we change, and try to eat better, again, we try to take along as many people as possible, lol. To "save them" from themselves.
You were right to take a stand for yourself though. Once it starts to dawn on them that you mean to take this journey come hell or high water, they may see that they, themselves are sinking and jump on board with you.
It's never too late to learn a new trick, right?
huggs
k
Kim SW 243 CW 182.6 GW 135

If hunger is not the problem, then eating is not the solution.---author anonymous

What doesn't kill us makes us stronger---Friedrich Nietzche








 
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jean4u responded:
MANDY, There will always be "food pushers". We can't control them but we are in charge of what WE put in our mouths. I like your mantra "I don't want to look like this next year" and you won't if you stay 80% on your plan. I say 80% because not all days will be 100% on track and that is OK. Progress not perfection because we are humans and we have our little swerves and slips but get back on plan ASAP.

I have my little gang of food pushers at the senior social events I go to. These seniors can really pack it away with the sweets and carbs. I had to train myself to just say "no". I eat a Fiber One bar shortly before going and drink a 22 oz. Crystal Light and that fills up my tummy and then I can get through it. I get ?'d all the time aren't you going to eat? This is something you will learn with practice.

Sounds like you are on YOUR way!!!! Keep up the good work!

Barb
 
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jean4u replied to Mandy29's response:
Mandy, Just a question....is their health issues related to their food choices. I had a SIL with diabetic and heart problems and she was overweight (300 lbs.) and ate poorly for most of her life. She passed away in her 40's.

Health. Another reason to eat healthier and move more.

Barb
 
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Mandy29 replied to jean4u's response:
I believe part of it is their food choices. Their way of thinking is We're old. We're going to enjoy what we want to. I've been encouraging healthier eating since I've been here. Although I have, the unhealthy and junky foods still make their way onto the grocery lists. Since my aunt had her stroke, she is no longer able to do the cooking. My uncle will cook sometimes. I think he just prefers not to cook anything that requires a lot of effort. Part of his thing, I think, is that he's not aware of which foods are really good for him and which ones are really bad for him. He's diabetic now. Growing up I've always noticed they keep things handy such as Banana Twins, Donut Sticks, Marshmallow Cakes, and some other Little Debbie treats. They still do. Since he's been out of the hospital from his injury, he's been drinking mostly water, eating whole wheat bread, brown rice. He's still got to have his coffee and the occasional 1/4 of a 12 oz Coca Cola. He's lost a bit of weight. While he seems to be willing to cooperate with some of my encouragement, mainly the whole wheat and whole grains, he doesn't seem interested in actually staying on a healthy eating regimen. He's commented that as soon as he's done healing, that his sugar should go back to being checked only at doctor's visits and he can go back to having his sodas and snack cakes. This has helped to discourage me from eating the unhealthy stuff. But, I'm still starting out and having to really work on my self-discipline.
I believe that once I'm done helping out here and go home permanently again, that I'll be better able to restrict my own eating habits. I don't ordinarily keep a lot of sweets at my house. The main thing I'll have trouble with at home is probably going to be sweet tea. Other than sweet beverages my biggest and most enormous weakness is chocolate. I'm a chocoholic. And I LOVE fried chicken. Growing up, my mother was either unknowledgable of eating nutritiously or just ignorant of it. There were not many meals in which she didn't fry the meat we were about to eat. She's always been big and for the most part so have I. Now she's diabetic and had a stroke in 2009. My aunt, I'm helping care for, when I was a kid she would always encourage me to clean my plate. This mentality was nearly drilled into me as I was always so eager to please her. Now I have a difficult time deciding to stop when I feel like I'm almost full. I read somewhere it takes the brain 20 minutes to register that you've had enough to eat. Once I can bring myself to consciously stop eating when I'm no longer hungry, I think I'll be able to make more progress.

Wow I really wrote a lot. Sorry so long winded
SW-265 GW-185
The minute you settle for less than you deserve, you get even less than you settled for.
- Maureen Dowd
 
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totallywiggedout replied to Mandy29's response:
Mandy, what I have found helpful on the 20 min fullness , is to put my fork down after every couple of bites and take a few full drinks of water or flavored water. This takes up half the time I would be just stuffing my face with the food, so by the time I do start to feel the fullness I've only eaten half of what I would have.
Perhaps this would help for you too.
Also, smaller plates and bowls help fool your mind into thinking that you are getting a "full Plate" of food.
I actually buy those cutesy plastic toddler bowls, like my Woody and Buzz Lightyear one to eat soups and cereals from. All most all of them are in 1 cup serving size but it does make a difference to SEE that you get a full bowl and it keeps things in the right perspective.
huggs
k
Kim SW 243 CW 182.6 GW 135

If hunger is not the problem, then eating is not the solution.---author anonymous

What doesn't kill us makes us stronger---Friedrich Nietzche








 
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Mandy29 replied to totallywiggedout's response:
Thank you I'll have to try that
SW-265 GW-185
The minute you settle for less than you deserve, you get even less than you settled for.
- Maureen Dowd
 
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jean4u replied to Mandy29's response:
MANDY, Thanks for going into detail about your aunt and uncle and even your Mom. Looking back at how we were raised has ALOT to do with our relationship to how we eat and THINK and FEEL about foods. I can go in a grocery store, when they are baking or cooking the food and just the smell and sight brings back the comfort sensation of the past. That IS something we have to deal with in creating our new healthier lifestyle. This IS a process!

About the fried chicken....there are recipes that we can do that will cut back on the fat and calories, by baking it. Spark People has alot of recipes and inspirational blogs. You are not going through this alone. I also like "fried" chicken.

Also, what you say about your Mom being diabetic and suffering a stroke, maybe she would not have to go through this if she did better on the things she could control to make her health better. I am 67, and had health issues, but I look at it this way, if I need to have surgeries I will heal better and faster the better health I am in BEFORE surgery and the rehab.

Also what you say about needing to work on self-discipline is true for all of us. I read a blog about motivation on Spark People (it's on the net) and it said when we work on discipline by making a routine, THEN we get motivation from this to keep it going. I found that real interesting as people all the time come on these boards asking for help to find/get some motivation to lose weight. It doesn't work that way....motivation doesn't just plop into your life and you can't buy it in a bottle or pill......you got to make it happen by creating your own routine.

Even the routine of checking in here and blogging about the good, bad, even day-to-day will help.

Just keep on keepin' on!

Barb
 
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jean4u replied to totallywiggedout's response:
KIM, I even have certain bowls for certain foods. Bigger ones for veggies and smaller ones for higher calorie foods.

Did you ever see that "diet program" they sell on TV that sells you a plate that has divisions for types of foods. Like we aren't smart enough to figure that out. I guess here's an example of how if people think by BUYING a diet program that they will actually lose weight. Wake up......we got to actually DO IT!!!!! And we don't need to buy anything to show us the way. I think there's a quote from The Wizard of Oz.....Dorothy you always had the power, something like that. We can buy the correct size bowls and plates at the dollar store or Wally World and come here for free or visit any of the free places like Spark People.com/ for support.

BTW, Kim has been super sharing in her knowledge and a very valuable board buddy, thanks KIM!!!

Barb

Barb
 
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lost815cm responded:
Growing up with a grandfather who made sweets for a living could be tough. I didn't live with him, but my entire family was always stopping in to say hi. He had this big green dish that was loaded with chocolates that he made at work. He was an accomplished confectioner, his bosses always wanting to send him cross country to train people on the art. Between him shoving the candy bowl in your face and grandma ignoring the fact that you said no to seconds, it a wonder I wasn't huge as a kid! But I wasn't. I was actually a fit kid. My weight started fluctuating when I hit puberty and was up and down all through my teen years. About 6 or 7 years ago is when I really started to gain. And some family members still repeatedly ask about another helping. Most of my aunts and uncles are severely overweight. My grandma was slightly plump, and grandpa was very thin. Go figure!
Catelyn SW 276 CW 250 GW 150

"Isn't it funny how day by day nothing changes but when you look back everything is different...." ~C.S. Lewis
 
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totallywiggedout replied to jean4u's response:
I swear to God, Barb, you did that to draw me out. Didn't you? LOL

Yes, I've been "lurking" more than participating this past couple of weeks. I'm not feeling myself lately and don't want to spread my malcontent with life onto you guys. I'd rather be here when I can be upbeat without straining and I always want to give good support when I can, but can't do it right now much without feeling like a two faced coin.
Didn't make my Oct goals. Very upset and trying to figure out exactly what it will take to get over this hump. It's going onto 3 months now that I've not dropped. I feel like I'm in maintenance rather than still trying to make inroads on my journey.
I'm doing 60 wall pushups on my mile walk now,and am thinking that I'm maybe adding heavier muscle to the mix and that's why my scales arent moving.... maybe. Who knows?
I AM paying attention here. though. I'm lurking.... so don't ANYBODY MOVE!!! lol
I appreciate your input, your blogs on your endeavors and the floating humor here. Always have. And I do check in every day, twice, sometimes more, just to vicariously stay in touch. You know I'm here, you feel me, I know you do......
huggs
k
Kim SW 243 CW 182.6 GW 135

If hunger is not the problem, then eating is not the solution.---author anonymous

What doesn't kill us makes us stronger---Friedrich Nietzche










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