Skip to content


    Attention All WebMD Community Members:

    These message boards are closed to posting. Please head on over to our new WebMD Message Boards to check out and participate in the great conversations taking place:

    Your new WebMD Message Boards are now open!

    Making the move is as easy as 1-2-3.

    1. Head over to this page:

    2. Choose the tag from the drop-down menu that clicks most with you (and add it to any posts you create so others can easily find and sort through posts)

    3. Start posting

    Have questions? Email us anytime at

    In Desperate need of help/guidance
    Bette_Porter posted:
    Hello. I am posting here because I am in serious need of help losing weight. In the past two years I have gained almost 200 lbs. I really don't know how it happened, but here I am pushing 300 lbs. I know what I need to do, but finding the motivation is extremely difficult. My husband wants to start to try for a family but I know it would be unwise to even think about pregnancy at my current weight. I had surgery in September this past year to get my gall bladder removed. It was an emergency surgery, and while I had it still in I was on a very limited diet (no spices, sugar, grease, or acid) however the pounds kept piling on, and now that it is out, I am gaining weight even more rapidly. I live in a swampy middle of nowhere so exercising is hard out doors, and I am renting a very tiny bedroom while our home is under construction. Since we are having housing difficulties, we are on a strict budget, and are forced to eat what our roommates cook. Please help.
    totallywiggedout responded:
    Hi Bette, Welcome.
    Since I never like to make assumptions about a certain condition, like your gallbladder removal, without googling it, I found this,
    How do we function when the Gall Bladder is removed?
    In western culture the Gall Bladder is usually removed when infected or partially blocked as a burst gall bladder is a MAJOR health risk. The removal of the gall bladder will result in a lack of smooth flow between the Liver and the individuals fat digestion. Most individuals that have had their gall bladder removed will need to either watch their fat intake, or balance their fat with bile supplements and enzymes

    ...If you are NOT already taking these suppliments and enzymes, I would strongly suggest requesting them from your physician since it sounds as if you are not metabolising the foods you are eating well enough to lose or even to maintain current weight.
    The other problem that I'm reading into your post is your own defeatist attitude. Whatever you set your OWN mind to, can and will happen. But you need the gumption to stand for your own right to be healthy and getting that weight down.
    You say outdoor activitiy is difficult because of the swampy area. Unless you fly in on a helicopter, there must be a driveway out to the main road. WALK it. Several times a day, back and forth until you are feeling better than your current lack of exercise is allowing you to feel. Exercise, especially outdoors can make you feel instantly "cleaner" and clear headed about your goals and walking is one of the best ways to get it because as you get more used to the activity, you can do it faster and more often.
    You and your husband are building a house. You can't be THAT monetarily destitute that you can't purchase at least SOME fresh and or frozen veggies and some fruits. Lettuce, celery and carrots are CHEAP per lb versus the cost of meats, and fat free low calorie dressings are MAYBE a few pennies more than regular, if that. You just have to WANT to do this. To make the changes in your diet that could result in a healthier you.
    Water is free. Drink at least 64 oz a day.
    I don't mean to sound condescending here. Your weight scares the living bejeezus out of me, and the fact that your husband wants to add insult to injury by having you get pregnant is just too much. You could easily become diabetic and certainly have blood pressure problems if you don't get extremely mindful of what you are eating and about doing some sort of exercise NOW before it's too late.
    Kim SW 252 CW 181.6 GW 135

    If hunger is not the problem, then eating is not the solution.---author anonymous

    If you are going through Hell,keep going.-- Winston Churchill

    blondie454u responded:
    Welcome aboard! Listen to Kim because she is right. You have to change the mindset. Can't is the same as saying won't.
    Amber CW 135 maintaining, SW 250. Stress is nothing more than a socially acceptable form of a mental illness.
    jis4judy responded:
    welcome aboard I double what Kim said
    Hugs Judy:)
    SW 247 CW 149ish maintaining

    Remember the Gold is not in the prize it's in the Journey
    life may not be the Party we expected but while we are here we may as well dance

    j9celeste responded:
    Hi Bette

    As usual, Kim has fabulous advice! What she is saying about your Gall Bladder is absolutely true. When we are missing this important organ, we need to compensate for it by replacing the enzymes that it provided. It does make a difference in our metabolism.

    I truly understand how frightening and frustrating it is to be close to the 300 pound mark. But the fact that you WANT to do something about it and are reaching out for help is wonderful.

    There are hundreds of "quick fixes" out there...and for most of us, none of them have worked in the long run. In my experience, the only thing that will get and keep us where we want to be as far as our physical health is eating better and exercising. Period. It can be a drag...I know. But veggies and fruits are really a lot cheaper than processed foods. Like a lot of people say, stick to the outside aisles of the grocery store for most of your shopping.

    It takes time and effort to prepare healthy food...but the benefits SO outweigh the effort. And start small...what can you do today? And only think of today. Yes, we need to plan our meals, but if we think about changing our entire lives it is really difficult.

    Keep your head up my dear. You ARE worth it. You deserve to be happy and healthy. You deserve to feel good.

    The most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you find someone to love the you that YOU love, well that's just fabulous. SW 286 CW 268
    abnersmom responded:
    Welcome Bette! Do you have any idea how many calories you consume a day? Or if your nutrition is balanced? To me, that is the place to start. Since you are online, you can use a free food log to track (there are lots, the one here on WebMD,, spark people to name a few). Be honest. Log everything you consume for a few days, including liquids. See where you stand and then make a plan - small changes, baby steps. It's a slow process to get the lbs. off but your health is worth it!!! Good luck.
    Debbie SW 265 CW 150 maintaining - Don't exchange what you want MOST for what you want at the moment.
    Bette_Porter replied to abnersmom's response:
    I am very grateful for all the wonderful comments and support, I would like to say, I am not sure exactly how many calories I consume daily, but I do know I eat maybe at the most twice a day. My appetite hasn't been very big lately. I generally don't eat red meat or pork, just poultry and Fish/seafood. I am a carbs girl though. I have gotten into the habit of making sure there are vegetables with every meal, and I am going out to buy a nice pair of supportive athletic shoes so that I can get into walking, and I am going to get my bike fixed. I am working on trying to do things for myself as of late, though I do find it hard. AND.. crazy enough I went to the emergency room because one of my scars from my surgery had started to bleed and I found out I was pregnant. I know now that I really have to be motivated and get in gear for my baby.
    blondie454u replied to Bette_Porter's response:
    Sorry you had to go to the ER but Congratulations!!! Yes being healthy for you and your baby is motivation! I hope you're well now.
    Amber CW 135 maintaining, SW 250. Stress is nothing more than a socially acceptable form of a mental illness.
    abnersmom replied to Bette_Porter's response:
    Congratulations on the baby and your commitment to getting healthy through nutrition and exercise.
    Debbie SW 265 CW 150 maintaining - Don't exchange what you want MOST for what you want at the moment.
    mellylopez responded:
    I heard this from a lady doing an ultra sound on me a few years back...

    She said her sister in law was very over weight and was trying to lose. but like yourself had limitations/restrictions. so what she did was fill her plate up with food as she normally would to sit down and eat. once at the table she would cut half of the food off her plate and throw it away. First thing out of my mouth... what a waste of food... lol BUT you can save it or share a plate with your husband.

    Any way she lost a lot of weight and has adapted to just eating less. That's really the whole BIG ideal of losing weight. eating right blah blah blah. you already know. but just try cutting the portions ONCE it is one the plate. I did n have lost 30 lbs. it goes off slow but once u notice you will NOTICE. plus I have seen many many many people lose weight so fast that they look great for a while but gain it all back n it is so sad.

    Good luck hope this gave you some insight. n May the pounds come off sista
    harlifabi replied to Bette_Porter's response:
    Hi Bette! You may not be consuming enough calories throughout the day. This could drive your body into starvation mode which will literally drop your metabolism to nearly a dead stop; which could be why you're not losing weight or having a difficult time doing so. Shoot for 2-3 larger meals and have healthy snacks (fresh fruit, veggies) in between! Congratulations on your baby and best wishes for a happy and healthy pregnancy, and future. If you have any other questions let me know I may be able to assist you!

    Bette_Porter replied to harlifabi's response:
    Thank you all for all the helpful tips! I have lost about 5 lbs. since finding out about my pregnancy, and I am continuing to do the healthy eating, I have cut out soda and artificial sugars and grease from my diet, although I still feel sluggish, though I am assuming that is the pregnancy fatigue.
    totallywiggedout replied to Bette_Porter's response:
    Grats on the 5 lb loss. Be careful to make sure that you don't endanger your pregnancy with dieting. Make sure that your doctor knows about what you are eating and what exercise you are doing just to be on the safe side.
    Really proud of you for eating healthier though. This will definitely help you and your unborn baby be stronger throughout gestation.
    Kim SW 252 CW 180.3 GW 135

    If hunger is not the problem, then eating is not the solution.---author anonymous

    If you are going through Hell,keep going.-- Winston Churchill

    blondie454u replied to Bette_Porter's response:
    Yes congrats! On the 5lbs loss and to cutting all the junk out of your diet. That baby doesn't need all that poison. Good for you!
    Amber CW 135 maintaining, SW 250. Stress is nothing more than a socially acceptable form of a mental illness.

    Spotlight: Member Stories

    I have always had a job that involved being at a computer..resulting in health related issues, the biggest one is my weight. I just retired (I think) ...More

    Helpful Tips

    Eating potato salad without feeling guilty
    The other night I bought a container of potato salad for dinner and instead of having a big pile of it on my plate, I filled half of my ... More
    Was this Helpful?
    4 of 4 found this helpful

    Related Drug Reviews

    • Drug Name User Reviews

    Report Problems With Your Medications to the FDA

    FDAYou are encouraged to report negative side effects of prescription drugs to the FDA. Visit the FDA MedWatch website or call 1-800-FDA-1088.