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Apology necessary
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mefirstforever posted:

Hi Ladies and Gents,
I must apologize for not posting sooner. I've been off the grid for over a month and a lot has been going on. I couldn't burden you with all the nitty gritty of life. Kim summed it up pretty well my upstairs mommy. I know that some of you ladies have lost your mothers to grave hilliness and I try to put thing in perspective but she drives me up the wall most days. I am the most patient and resilient person you will find but she knows how to push my buttons. Anyway to make a long story short we had a grave fight and I said thing that I held back for many years. Don't feel any better, because she did what she could with the means she had. After the fight I got sick for at least 3 weeks a general weakness and sadness got over me. Hope this has helped me to heal old wounds.
Thank goodness I'm starting to feel better, still very fragile but trying to toughen up.
Enough about me.

First I want to welcome all the newbies on this board. You have been getting great advise from all the regulars.
Most of all congratulation in taking charge of your live. It won't be easy even very hard. But as most of you know that nothing worthwhile is free and easy.

Some of you have lost weight, so a warm congratulation.
Some have maintained and some have gained some back.
But the most important thing is that we are not giving up.

I'm know 205 and gained, knowing that I stayed 2 weeks in bed not and excuse but an observation that moving has a big role in maintaining or loosing weight.

I mist you guess very much even though I keep on peeking from time to time.

Huggs
Helene
Helene GW 140 CW 201 SW 224
Every day is a gift do your best, be kind especially to yourself and smile.
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jis4judy responded:
Hi Helene
good to see you posting again but sad that you are haveing a tough time in the caretaker role enough to make you sick and weak...It sure isn;t easy takeing care of a parent I am sure of that I never had that experience my mom lived independantly until maybe 2 years before passing the youngest sister took her in and she lived with her till the end and still not needing any care she passed away in the hospital ..very sick congestive heart failure...
Maybe when you get back on your healthy journey you will begin to feel better
Hugs Judy:)
SW 247 CW 149ish maintaining

Remember the Gold is not in the prize it's in the Journey
life may not be the Party we expected but while we are here we may as well dance

 
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totallywiggedout responded:
HELENE!!!!! MY GOD , I thought you'd fallen off the face of the Earth!!! Welcome back my friend! Pffft it's not such a big gain. Don't fret, you had a bad emotional setback but you still didn't give up and you know as well as I do that that's like winning a small war. So congratulations.
I've honestly mised you and thought of you often. Hope to see more of you now that you are feeling better. It's not a crime to do for yourself before others, Helene. Sometimes, it's even necessary for your sanity.
huggs
k
Kim SW 252 CW 180.3 GW 135

If hunger is not the problem, then eating is not the solution.---author anonymous

If you are going through Hell,keep going.-- Winston Churchill








 
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abnersmom responded:
Welcome back, Helene! You've been missed. I'm so sorry about your fight with your mother. Being a caretaker for a family member is the hardest thing in the world. Only family know how to push those buttons and what will get to you the most! I'm glad that you are starting to feel better. Take good care of yourself.
Debbie SW 265 CW 150 maintaining - Don't exchange what you want MOST for what you want at the moment.
 
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jean4u responded:
Helene, No need to say sorry. We all need time out for various reasons. I heard somethig recently that I am going to tell you. It is very important to not cling to anything negative it is just more baggage and wears us down. What happened with your Mother happened....let it go, shake it off and get on with
LIFE.

Thanks for the congrats on my weightloss. I have been working on it since January!

Back to "LIFE", yes we all have things happen or circumstances that make our day-to-day more challenging, but we can't, like YOU say GIVE UP. Maybe time out when needed, but not GIVE UP!

WELCOME BACK!!!

Barb

BTW, we missed YOU!
 
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blondie454u responded:
Glad you're back! I feel your pain. I had to help my mom take care of my grandmother who had Alzheimer and she was very mean. We couldn't get her to reason at all most of time. It was a constant struggle. Hang in there and come here when you can to boost your morale!
Amber CW 135 maintaining, SW 250. Stress is nothing more than a socially acceptable form of a mental illness.
 
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mefirstforever replied to jis4judy's response:
Thank you so much for the replies.

I will follow your advice Barb. Some days it's harder than others. My mom has a great memory of mistakes but not so much of good times. I think that as you get older, you start to loose control of your life and your physical capacity. It must be so scary. I have to keep this in mind all the time.

No I haven't fallen of the face of the earth Kim, at least not physically. When you fall you pick yourself up, sweep yourself off and start the new day with a smile and a positive attitude. And all is well again.
Judy thanks for the good words and I love your new picture!!!

Thanks Debbie and Amber for the good words. It's nice to see that you're not alone.

I have to learn to move forward, live know and look only at the future.
Huggs to all
Helene
Helene GW 140 CW 201 SW 224
Every day is a gift do your best, be kind especially to yourself and smile.
 
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justmejust responded:
Hi Helene, so glad you checked in to keep in touch. We've always had about the same weight goals so I think of you often when you are away.

I don't know if you want to share here the grave thing you held back many years or not. That must feel really bad to feel and to say it.

Although I lost my dear mom when I was 30, I know that if she were here today she might be annoying in her own way at times. That is probably natural. And you living with her and being her caretaker I understand is always extremely challenging. Do you have anyone to help so you can get a regular break now and then?

And Amber, if your grandma had alzheimers, their brains are unable to reason. The brain has shrunk and the thoughts can't fire from place to place anymore in the brain. I am sorry it must have been a very difficult time for you and your mom.
Laura

Baby steps, to a healthy lifestyle change. When you change your thoughts you will then change your weight. Getting healthy is about progress, not perfection.
 
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blondie454u replied to justmejust's response:
Laura,

It more difficult for my mother. She had moved in with her. I helped cook meals and send them down to them because I lived on the same property but since she was going crazy I had to move. She was saying awful things to authorities and they didn't have proof of any of it but I was afraid of losing my son. So my mom told me leave to protect us. That's how I ended up living in an apartment. Then I moved closer to my new job.
Amber CW 135 maintaining, SW 250. Stress is nothing more than a socially acceptable form of a mental illness.
 
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justmejust replied to blondie454u's response:
Amber, sorry to hear it, and it does sound very difficult for your mother. I am glad you are in a better place now! None of my family members diagnosed with alziemers or dementia have been mean or crazy. They just didn't know who we were, it was sad. I wonder if your grandma has something else wrong? Does she recognize your mom?

(Hugs) Laura
Laura

Baby steps, to a healthy lifestyle change. When you change your thoughts you will then change your weight. Getting healthy is about progress, not perfection.
 
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jean4u replied to blondie454u's response:
AMBER, What a difficult time for your family. Glad things are much better now. That must have been tough to stay on a healthy plan, too. We have to learn to keep on our journeys, especially when we are having stress because it is then that we are soooo vulnerable and want comfort from food or taking it east and skipping our exercise.

You did survive a very tough time, like the Kelly Clarkston song....makes you STRONGER!

Barb
 
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blondie454u replied to justmejust's response:
Yes she recognized her. She just would make up random horrible things that she was doing or I was doing. She isn't no longer living. She passed away a year and half ago so she is at peace now.
Amber CW 135 maintaining, SW 250. Stress is nothing more than a socially acceptable form of a mental illness.
 
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blondie454u replied to jean4u's response:
This is very true. I made it so therefore I can do anything. Nothing ever gets in my way of my healthy life. I will always find a way during trying times. You have to have that mindset or you will always find reasons to always fail.
Amber CW 135 maintaining, SW 250. Stress is nothing more than a socially acceptable form of a mental illness.
 
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jean4u replied to blondie454u's response:
There will ALWAYS be something to get us off track (too many to even start listing). This journey is filled with detours, etc., like a road trip for the first time and as we stay on, we know the way but still there are those construction zones.

I like the quote: Make yourself stronger than your excuses.

Barb
 
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totallywiggedout replied to jean4u's response:
again....


http://gregprovenzano.com/2012/10/26/acn-greg-provenzano-are-you-making-excuses-or-progress/
Kim SW 252 CW 180.3 GW 135

If hunger is not the problem, then eating is not the solution.---author anonymous

If you are going through Hell,keep going.-- Winston Churchill










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