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Obsession versus Motivation
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mog1026 posted:
This is a question for all of you who have succeed at weight loss and are the role models for those of us just starting, like Judy, Kim, Barb, Amber and Debbie. You must have seen a lot of people come and go on the board and I wonder if you have any insight on why someone stays or disappears. I find that I'm thinking about this process all day long and I wonder if you did too and if you continued to do so for quite some time. I know I'm the most boring person in the world right now but is this good or do you see people burn out?
Kathy SW 235.1 CW 213.6. GW 165
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jis4judy responded:
Hi Kathy I have no idea why some people just fade away But I can tell you being a part of this board helps keep my journey to better health in the front of my mind . and if I am lucky I can help someone else to get control of their health and that make me feel wonderful... when that happens I am nearly a decade on my journey ..
Hugs Judy:)
SW 247 CW 150ish maintaining

Remember the Gold is not in the prize it's in the Journey
life may not be the Party we expected but while we are here we may as well dance

 
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rachael2011 responded:
Excellent question, Kathy. I have been wondering the same thing and feeling the way you describe.
Rachael...under construction.

SW 325 CW 315 Short term goal-299 Goal weight- Unsure
 
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blondie454u responded:
It also maybe a time issue. It takes a lot of time to read through all these post. I usually do mine at work in between down times. Some days I don't have that time. That's why you may not see me for a few days. On weekends I am hardly on here. I don't have the time or just want to be away from the computer because I work on them day in and day out.
Amber CW 135 maintaining, SW 250. Stress is nothing more than a socially acceptable form of a mental illness.
 
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itsashayduh responded:
I know it does not seem like i stick around, but i am on here at least once a day during the week reading peoples post. Just like Amber, i am on here while i am at work. I dont post much buth rather read peoples stories and it helps keep me motivated. And i think that is the main reason i keep coming back. I need the motvation because that is my biggest down fall and just seeing the people that have gotten to a healthier self, reminds me that i can too.
 
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totallywiggedout responded:
Kathy,
For one thing, you are anything BUT boring. Don't ever think that about yourself, you are beautiful, you are strong and you are intelligent enough to carry a conversation without a bucket.
This particular community isn't just about dieting. Each and every one of us gets connected to the others in some way or another. This is an ever growing , ever evolving circle of friends.
That said, some of us take what we have needed all along to help us grow stronger and more able to cope with staying on a healthier path. Once some are strong enough, like a little bird testing it's feathers, they finally fly away. We never truly lose them, because their ideas and input are still here and still being shared. We have the memory of their warmth, wit and wisdom and we pay it forward.
Personally. I like the site. I feel comfortable here and I love the people. My friends. This is my second home. This is where I come when I know I need someone to understand what I'm feeling and going through and someone will ALWAYS help me find my way.
Huggs
k
Kim SW 252 CW 180.3 GW 135

If hunger is not the problem, then eating is not the solution.---author anonymous

If you are going through Hell,keep going.-- Winston Churchill








 
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jis4judy replied to totallywiggedout's response:
I second what Kim wrote I could not say it any better bravo Kim you nailed it. I still remember a few of the ones that left and things they shared are now part of me and anyone that came here ...at the time they were here we learn from each other
Hugs Judy:)
SW 247 CW 150ish maintaining

Remember the Gold is not in the prize it's in the Journey
life may not be the Party we expected but while we are here we may as well dance

 
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rohvannyn responded:
I'm not one of the maintainers yet but I may have some insight too. I know that when I don't work as hard on my health, and for one reason or another know I am backsliding a lot, I have an urge to not come here and admit it. Time is also an issue as I am only here workload permitting as well.
Roh

'Your focus determines your reality.' -QGJ

'Try not. Only do.' --Y
 
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jean4u responded:
KATHY,

Girl, You totally got me thinking.. slow learner. Did some rightt things and then fell back. I thought these were failures but then when i learmed these were "slips"....kinda changed my thinking.

Barb
 
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totallywiggedout replied to rohvannyn's response:
I'm maintaining, but that's not where I want to be yet, lol.
I'm not done till the fat lady sings!
Oh, heck. I stay away for a bit too when I slip and fall in the chocolate mud (pies) . I hate to come here and see winners who are losing and losers who are winning. And I also hate that I always want to help others even when I suck at helping myself. It makes me feel like a hypocrite when I step off the path of my journey, but prod others to stay on theirs.
But that's what we do. It's all we CAN do.
None of us is much more than self educated in the journey. Nor should we be ashamed of that. And being self educated, we must have our failures before we have our successes. It's all part of the process of progress. Right?
As always...
Progress not Perfection.
huggs
k
Kim SW 252 CW 180.3 GW 135

If hunger is not the problem, then eating is not the solution.---author anonymous

If you are going through Hell,keep going.-- Winston Churchill








 
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jean4u responded:
Kathy, this is my 2nd post on this thread. What you say about detecting the people who will stick. There does seem to be a theme, people who want to lose for an event (wedding, etc.) it's just to look good or fit into a dress, people who want this board to give or find their motivation, people who want a serum, pill to make it easier/quicker, people who are "too gung-ho" who can keep that adrenaline going, really. I could go on and on but you get my drift.

Now, the people who stick......before I got going, I read the posts for several weeks and saw a common theme in the "hanger-ons" they were the regulars on HERE. That was my Oprah "light bulb" moment. Guess I got to start posting. That in itself is making a committment. Then I became more knowledgeable and read about and made healthier recipe and read motivational quotes and stories of how people shed their weight. I liked being on the team. This was my new happy place. lol

BTW, you say you are "boring", my daughter and I have an expression about people who come out "flash & trash" they tend to burnout real fast. Remember who won the race? Not the fastest......slow and steady will keep us in the race and NOT burnout. So boring here is a good thing. I don't really think you are, though. Since you have been here, Kathy, you got us tapping the keys and thinking.

I keep running into this quote: If you're tired of starting over then stop giving up. That is my new mantra. Sort of my anti-yo-yo-dieting anti rant.

Remember a "slip" or wrong choice is NOT giving up or a failure that is sooo important to change our thinking. Forgive the slip and get on with healthier choices. Now the consistency of those healthier choices may seem like an obsession but I like to think of it as DEDICATION. There is another "D" word that kicked in for me DISCIPLINE and that is a scary word for people like me who were horizontal on the couch for too many years except to get up for food. Anyway, I found that with DISCIPLINE (doing the same thing 80% of the time), create a ROUTINE (healthy foods, movement) and then a really truly amazing thing happens, I got MOTIVATION to continue the process and guess what the outome is PROGRESS!!!!!

We DESERVE to be healthy!

Barb

P.S. Yes it will take work and Yes we will get discouraged, but give up....NO!
 
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mog1026 replied to jean4u's response:
Oh Barb that was the answer I needed. I started as that wedding momma before health and walking became my major goal. And I've been worrying about being "flash and trash" as you put it. I've been worried that being too "Gung ho" signaled that I wouldn't succeed. I hope that like you, if I keep on posting and staying engaged it will be possible to get to my goal. I can't imagine what would make me stop except the tedium of my own voice talking endlessly about what I eat and what I weigh. I really don't have any other choice but to do it unless I want to spend my life sitting in a chair with my feet up. I like your new mantra by the way.
Kathy SW 235.1 CW 213.6. GW 165
 
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jis4judy replied to jean4u's response:
Hi Barb I wish I had a like button for your post ,, You realy explained it well why some leave and others stay, I know we had a different group of regulars a while back and it has shifted over time to a new group I believe I have been the one on the longest so far ,, I still communicate with some former regulars from before on facebook
Jobabes Tanya Lizzy some you might remember
Hugs Judy:)
SW 247 CW 150ish maintaining

Remember the Gold is not in the prize it's in the Journey
life may not be the Party we expected but while we are here we may as well dance

 
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jean4u replied to mog1026's response:
Kathy, my Mom was an "event" dieter and needed a wedding or party to get herself to shed weight. I was the yo-yo and never could reach goal weight. It truly was this board and witnessing the dedication of the posters to their routines. They would post what they ate and drank and exercise; sometimes it was the same many days, but that IS what it takes consistency. It did not seem boring to me. I was intrigued with their success to shed weight.

I was very fearful that I wouldn't stick to it, why on earth would I when I couldn't keep on a "diet" before. BIG difference this isn't a "diet". Slow changes for a healthier lifestyle. We make the choices. Heck it probably took me 6 months before I started tracking my water intake. Just this past year I got serious about portions. I am not the fastest learner but this is not a race. Got to fess up, too, I was very resistent about making a lifestyle change, hee hee. Didn't want to change my style of eating for life, just long enough to get the weight off. Then I must've had another Oprah "lightbulb moment" that I had to change my thinking about the lifestyle thing. I drank the Kool Aid!

Barb
 
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jean4u replied to jis4judy's response:
Judy, thank you! I was very fearful in the beginning when I came here, too, that I would not stay. I really think it is the posting, yep, the good, the bad and the ugly. When it's good it is fun to share, but when we binge or gain, it's yucky, but that's life (like Frank Sinatra said LOL).

Got to ask are those on Facebook still in maintenance and successful with their weight? Is there a particular reason why not on here anymore?

Judy, you are the person I think has been here the longest. I really consider that an honor.....think about all the people you have influenced. I learned so many useful tips and tools from you. That "self talk" saved me from some binge times. Knowing that we are not alone in this struggle is very powerful, too.

I know I might be helped by a support group but did not want to pay money for Weight Watchers and did not want to go to meetings or follow "their way". I like my independence on figuring out "my way". I also like the 24-7 availability of this board.

I love that you have been in maintenance for, is it 9 years!, now, to keep off something like 100 lbs.. That IS truly inspiring!!!

Barb


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