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Getting up and brushing myself off!
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j9celeste posted:
Hello everybody.

I fell down extremely hard in April and stayed down all month. At the beginning of April I weighed 255, and today I weigh 264. Wow. I know what happened. I only drank two or three bottles of water a day instead of four. I stopped going on my food and fitness planner and was NOT keeping track of what I ate. I hardly moved at all. I stopped coming here every day.

The cortisone shot didn't work so my surgeon did a gel injection and told me that it would take three weeks for the full effect. Tomorrow is three weeks and there has been no effect. I see him again tomorrow. I had a surgery in a private place (TMI?) and have had pain from that constantly.

I got angry and depressed. I had no idea how to get going again. At the end of April I decided to start writing some poetry again since that has always helped me with my feelings. I was amazed at what came out...at what was inside. I was also amazed at how much it helped.

I finally asked my husband for help on my birthday (the 8th.) I'm not getting any younger and I don't want to be on a walker for the rest of my life. I want to live!! He is 6'5" and weighs 238. His doctor told him to get down below 200 pounds and he's been trying without any luck. So I challenged him...we will have a "race" to 199. He has a 26 pound head start on me, but I know it's harder to lose the weight the closer you are to your goal.

Being a recovering alcoholic (five years sober), I know that I have a "daily reprieve based on my spiritual condition." If I don't get to meetings and do my readings, when I have the urge to drink I have no defense. This is no different. If I'm not talking about my journey here and with my family, I am not accountable and I get lazy. We say in AA that alcohol is cunning, baffling, and powerful. It is also patient. Food is for me as well. It's waiting for me if I am not being vigilant. For me, to drink is to die. My weight is also threatening my life and I don't want to die young or be crippled the rest of my life because of my weight. I hope that nobody is offended by my sharing my AA stuff, but for me this is so similar that I'm always making the comparison.

I don't know if the challenge is a good thing or not, but it's getting me back on track and keeps my health in the front of my mind. I know what I need to do...I just need to get off my bum and do it! My pain and depression are not an excuse to treat my body poorly. It's a vicious circle...I know the healthier my body is, the healthier my mind is.

It's a cliche, but sometimes cliches say it all. Today is the first day of the rest of my life. It's completely up to me how I want my life to be. Thank you for always being here even when I've been absent.

Celeste
The most exciting, challenging, significant relationship you have is the one you have with yourself. And if you find someone who loves the you that YOU love, that's fabulous SW 286 CW 255 GW 165
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totallywiggedout responded:
Celeste,
For me, there IS no such thing as TMI, lol. Sooooo if you had one of those vaginal tightening surgeries... I WANNA KNOW ABOUT IT! truthfully, though, I have wondered if they work.... sorta like what Pinky's going through.
But then again, I'm sorta the Nut in amongst all you fruits, lol and am a glutton for new information on anything.
I'm sorry April was so awful for you. I was having injections in my lower back for a time to reduce pain. It never worked but since my auto insurance was paying for it, I went on with about 6 of them. Until I saw just how expensive they were, 3,000.00 because it was considered a "surgical proceedure" . That's when I called a halt to it. They were supposed to work for up to 1.5 months per shot and it never gave me more than 3 days relief.
Losing weight is the way to go for you knees, Celeste. There's really no other way until you decide to go for replacements. And if you are like me, you are scared to death to go on the table so big, because it ups your chances of stroke.
It's good that you got your husband on the bandwagon. It will help to have a partner so close. We are always here, but it does help to have someone at home to hold you accountable.
Print up signs for your kitchen cabinet doors, pantry door, and fridge.
"Have you logged your food today?"
"Go to the Community, instead of the fridge!"
"Is your body hungry, or thirsty?"
"Go weigh yourself!"
"Is it time to EAT or EXERCISE?"
Stuff like this can help. As silent reminders that literally scream out that you don't need that snack or whatever, they keep things in check.
If you needed a crutch to help you walk, you'd use one. If you need these signs as "crutches" to help you stay on your journey, why not?
huggs
k
Kim SW 252 CW 176.8 GW 135

If hunger is not the problem, then eating is not the solution.---author anonymous

If you are going through Hell,keep going.-- Winston Churchill








 
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jean4u responded:
Hi Celeste & Happy belated Birthday! Hope it was a good one!

Glad to hear that you are taking a review of what things are and how they can effect your life. When we get off our path it is important to take stock.

Good to see you here. I support your journey!

Barb
 
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j9celeste replied to totallywiggedout's response:
Kim

Those are some fabulous ideas. Thank you. I have never thought of weighing myself when I feel like eating! You're right, I need these "walkers"

IF YOU HAVE A WEAK STOMACH OR DON'T WANT TO HEAR ABOUT MY SURGERY, DON'T READ ANY FURTHER!!


TURN BACK NOW...IT'S NOT TOO LATE!


IT MIGHT BE TMI!






I didn't have the tightening surgery. When I saw my doctor two weeks ago, I mentioned to her that I had something funky going on down there. She told me that I had a skin tag on my labia, so she set up an appointment with a OB/Gyn to get it cut off. The OB/Gyn was a little surprised when she found a 1 1/2 piece of labia that was torn away. She had to cut if off and stitch me up. Not a lot of fun...not a great place for needles with numbing medicine or scalpels!

Celeste
The most exciting, challenging, significant relationship you have is the one you have with yourself. And if you find someone who loves the you that YOU love, that's fabulous 286-1/6/ 13-CW 264 GW 165
 
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j9celeste replied to jean4u's response:
Thank you Barb...for the birthday wishes and the support!

Celeste
The most exciting, challenging, significant relationship you have is the one you have with yourself. And if you find someone who loves the you that YOU love, that's fabulous 286-1/6/ 13-CW 264 GW 165
 
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jis4judy replied to j9celeste's response:
Happy Birthday Celeste I think all of us had a tough time getting the right frame of mind for this journey , once you make the decision to do this forever you will be fine even when your housebound and sick it is essential to eat healthy .. as healthy as possible ...it really does beat dieting
Hugs Judy:)
SW 247 CW 150ish maintaining

Remember the Gold is not in the prize it's in the Journey
life may not be the Party we expected but while we are here we may as well dance

 
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j9celeste replied to jis4judy's response:
Hi Judy.

Thank you for the support. You're right about my frame of mind.

Celeste
The most exciting, challenging, significant relationship you have is the one you have with yourself. And if you find someone who loves the you that YOU love, that's fabulous 286-1/6/ 13-CW 264 GW 165
 
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j9celeste replied to jis4judy's response:
Hi Judy

Thank you for the words of encouragement. You nailed it on the head when you said that it's a new frame of mind.

Celeste
The most exciting, challenging, significant relationship you have is the one you have with yourself. And if you find someone who loves the you that YOU love, that's fabulous 286-1/6/ 13-CW 264 GW 165
 
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totallywiggedout replied to j9celeste's response:
How the Hell did THAT happen, Celeste? Did you catch yourself with a fingernail? OUCH-IE !
I've heard of skin tags before, in fact my oldest son got on the bottom of his scrotum when he was about 13. Scared him to death till we found out it wasn't serious.
Like you, he wasn't thrilled with the removal though, lol
I've gained over the last couple of days... must've been "mother's day" buildup because with Michael gone, noone wanted me to cook, so out we went , tra la......Chinese Friday, Pizza yesterday, and then my "Mother's day" at Longhorn..... OMG I peeked at the scale this am and am disgusted. Back on my paleo tomorrow. Really the boys wanted to take me out so bad today, I just really really didn't want to go out, but it was their present to me.... WHY O WHY do we have to celebrate with FOOD??? I really hate our customs sometimes, ya know?
I think the kids are just thinking I must be getting tired of the monkey salads and avocado egg salad... but really, I'm not. I could eat monkey salad every day, every meal and it prolly wouldn't bother me one bit.
Now I just have to convince everyone else that I'm ok with what I eat.
I hope everyone had a really great mother's day.
huggs
k
Kim SW 252 CW 176.8 GW 135

If hunger is not the problem, then eating is not the solution.---author anonymous

If you are going through Hell,keep going.-- Winston Churchill








 
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totallywiggedout replied to j9celeste's response:
Happy belated birthday , Celeste. I hope you had a good day.
huggs
k
Kim SW 252 CW 176.8 GW 135

If hunger is not the problem, then eating is not the solution.---author anonymous

If you are going through Hell,keep going.-- Winston Churchill








 
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tnmist responded:
Happy B-day Celeste. Thank you for your honesty, too...I've been struggling, but I've never had it together to lose....so, I guess I'm just having a hard time "getting with the program." Anyway, I'm glad you are back on track. You are inspiring to me, believe it or not, but do, because I mean it.
Misty
Insanity: Doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. - Albert Einstein
 
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jis4judy replied to totallywiggedout's response:
Hi Kim
My daughter wanted to take me out for mothers day I explained to her that going out on Moms day is not fun for me
so she came over and brought the fixings for a wonderful vegie and shrimp stir fry that she cooked that was my Moms day gift and I really enjoyed it ...I made a no bake peanut butter pie for dessert . was great day over all 2 walks morning exercise walk then an afternoon social walk .
The reason I hate going out on Mothers day the eateries
change the menus for Moms day and raise the prices it is not only expensive but you cannot even get what you want.. so we save eating out for fathers day and my hubbys birthday
they don;t have over crowding or changed menus on those days ...
Hugs Judy:)
SW 247 CW 150ish maintaining

Remember the Gold is not in the prize it's in the Journey
life may not be the Party we expected but while we are here we may as well dance

 
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jean4u replied to j9celeste's response:
Good that you got that taken care of, never know what could have happened if not. My dau had some pre-cancerous treatment that they could not numb and it hurt like h--l, but needed to be done. I used to get a cyst in a delicate area, too. Anyway, never TMI if we can share info that helps others.

Thanks for sharing.

Barb
 
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jean4u replied to j9celeste's response:
Celeste, I would read and read the posts here BEFORE I started my journey and think about what these people were doing and I would wonder IF I could actually do this as a journey....that is quite a committment!

I think what turned the corner for me was the postings about how this IS a struggle. BUT we do have the power to eat healthy and to fight those emotions and boredom and mindless eating, also to move more each day and forgive ourselves when we don't.

JUDY is right, it is getting your "frame of mind" focused on what choices will get you further on YOUR journey.

Stay strong!

Barb
 
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jean4u replied to totallywiggedout's response:
Kim, the important thing about eating out and "food splurges", is to get back on your plan and deal with those gains. I weigh daily and noticed I was above maintenance weight 3 days this month (May). I am back in maintenance weight, but would not be if I didn't track my 2-3 or more "splurge meal/snack" gains.

I did the Chinese splurge meal, too. I almost never have it and it is a treat. I did that yesterday and have some of it leftover and will let my dau eat it today. I got a break on the scale, though and stayed in maintenance range.

Here's to your Paleo Plan.....eat clean, train mean! String a few of these days together and you will knock off that gain. The reverse works, too, string enough of those high sodium over-carb restaurant meals and we put it back on, too.

We can do this!!!

Barb


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