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grieving early and nobody to talk to
beautifulbuffalo posted:
My brother has ALS. He's only had it since March 2013. They say some ALS patients can live for 5 years. My brother is at his worst. He is in a nursing home and on hospice. He can't talk, walk or barely write. We never got along but I gave in and decided to see him. He cried. He has chosen to starve to death. He has stopped his tube feedings 6 weeks ago. The only thing keeping him alive is the meds and the little water they put in his tube.

I have put on 4lbs. I have beeen eating everything in sight.
Any suggestions.
parakeet210 responded:
I will say a prayer for you as this is a most difficult situation.
I'm sorry this is happening. Try exercising.
This moment is your life, choose to live it. Grab all the gusto you can!!!

tweety 'keet'

SW 264.0. GW. 170 CW 255.4
mog1026 responded:
Oh BB, that is a tragic tragic situation. I am so sorry. It is terribly stressful and I guess my advice is to just be good to yourself right now. Try and get enough sleep. See your doctor if it gets overwhelming and ask for help rather than self-medicating with alcohol if you are so inclined. Personally I don't think I would stress too much about dieting right now other than to make healthy choices whenever you can because they will give you more energy. God Bless you and your brother.
Kathy SW 235.1 CW 216.4. GW 165

Greedily she ingorg'd without restraint,
And knew not eating Death
Milton, Paradise Lost
totallywiggedout responded:
Good Morning.
Truly the only thing worse than grief is remorse. "Could have", "Should have" and "Would have" don't work when you have no time left. Spend as much time with your brother as possible, Now, while there is still time to do it. Even if he isn't aware that you are there, it will help you in the process of your grief, knowing that you were there for him at the end.
Know this... no matter how much you try to console yourself with food , you simply cannot eat away your grief and sadness. It's a hole in your heart, hon, not your stomach.
My thoughts are with you and prayers for your brother. Remember. His life, his choice. All you can do is be there. For both of you.

gw 135

If you can't do something willingly and joyfully, then don't do it. If you give up drinking, don't go moaning about it; go back on the bottle. Do. As. Thou. Wilt.--- Peter O'Toole

jis4judy responded:
Hi BB Jayne
My brother passed away in 2006 from MS He was in a nursing home for the last 6 years of his life I used to visit him weekly I had hoped he enjoyed the visits but It certainly helped me cope with his MS and He was the strongest person I ever knew so I still didn;t believe it when he passed away
It was still hard to accept . BUt I didn't waver in my journey back then some things need to be done no matter what You matter too remember that
Hugs Judy
SW 247 CW 150ish maintaining

Remember the Gold is not in the prize it's in the Journey
life may not be the Party we expected but while we are here we may as well dance

rachael2011 responded:
BB, You and your brother have been on my heart since I read your post this morning, When my mom passed away a couple years ago, I took solace in the fact that despite our years of arguing, we were OK with each other in the end. And with time, I am able to see her perspective on a lot of our rift. I am so glad that you decided to see your brother. Take care of yourself. Like everyone says, get your sleep, see you doc if you need to and try to be healthy. Exercise if you can and let your head reminisce about your brother. I will be preying for you.
Rachael...under construction.

SW 325 CW 295.4 Short term goal-275 Goal weight- unsure
rachael2011 replied to rachael2011's response:
Sorry, meant to write praying for you.
Rachael...under construction.

SW 325 CW 295.4 Short term goal-275 Goal weight- unsure
beautifulbuffalo replied to rachael2011's response:
I managed to get myself up and go to the gym and work out. Only could do 1/2 hour. I'll try again tomorrow. All I did while working out was stare into space imaging my brother and the way he looks. And then I thought about me and the nodule found in my left lung wondering if it's cancer. My grandmother died of lung cancer. My mother had lung cancer and now maybe me. I've got a lot on my plate right now.

I want to eat right but part of me just doesn't care.
totallywiggedout replied to beautifulbuffalo's response:
Have you ever heard of Kris Carr? She did a show called "Crazy, Sexy Cancer" a few years ago. She was diagnosed inoperable and decided that she wasn't going to let it rule her life.
Here's one of her links... she has many, just google her

She changed her diet and kept her fun, life loving attitude and has flourished.
You don't know if your nodule is cancer, but this is certainly a wake up call to do everything in your power to get healthier. You owe it to yourself and your loved ones to try your damnedest to LIVE, be healthy, and be happy.

You only get one ride on this merry go round.... make sure you get the most time to have fun on it that you can.
While it lasts.

It is your choice of course. But understand and believe this. Eating right, Eating Healthy, shouldn't be considered a chore. It's a privilege.
Some people can't afford to or don't have access to good , healthy food sources. You do.
You , and the rest of us, have no excuse to eat foods that harm us in any way... that includes making us unhealthily obese.
In that same vein, we have no real excuse to be so gluttonous, so self absorbed and so greedy as to eat until we make ourselves unhealthy when so many of the World's people are starving. If we have so much extra money or food that we can stuff our faces every day, all day, then we have enough to give away.. to donate to those people that don't have enough.

Please, don't take your health for granted. You are on the precipice of making some irreversible mistakes. I beg you to consider choosing a life well lived instead of an end full of regrets.

huggs and good thoughts
gw 135

If you can't do something willingly and joyfully, then don't do it. If you give up drinking, don't go moaning about it; go back on the bottle. Do. As. Thou. Wilt.--- Peter O'Toole

blondie454u responded:
I will be praying for you and your family.
Amber CW 135-139 maintaining, SW 250. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. 1Cor. 13:7

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