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    Black hole
    ladylavender posted:
    Can't seem to get past not caring about anything - my health, my home, my life. No energy to do anything. I was just replying on another board about how odd it is for me not to be excited about going back to school. I used to love school, and here I am procrastinating and dragging my feet so much that I may miss important deadlines and really screw up just getting in to classes this fall. (Vocational Rehabilitation is supposed to be financing it.)

    A bit of a catch 22 because if I put better nutrition into my body I would probably feel better and have more energy and start caring about life again. Been afraid for a couple of months now to even see what the scale says.

    Tired of being tired. Can't seem to break this cycle. Need a miracle.

    My psychologist wants me back on regular meds, but I've been dragging my feet on that, too - getting in to see my PCP, a doctor I don't care much for but don't have any other - been trying to find a good PCP here since I moved here 5 years ago. It's frustrating.

    Not to mention the whole financial scenario - bleak. My right wrist is healed as much as it will ever heal. The fusion has forced many adjustments to everyday living, but I'm grateful to have use of my fingers.

    I don't know how to CARE anymore.

    Thanks for listening.
    Insanity: Doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. - Albert Einstein

    jis4judy responded:
    Hi Abby
    I sure hope you are feeling a bit better today I have been in that dark place before usually a walk outside can lift my spirits
    I don't know how that works but it does

    I find in my experience that doctors are only helpful when you have a disease because that's what they are educated on they are clueless about healthy living . Have you tried have a good self talk to help you get going ..?
    If Kim can live with her hip and leg adjustments your hand should be ok after a while as you get used to living differently
    climb out of that dark space and start living yourlife in a healthy way that can help too
    my best wishes for you Hugs Judy
    SW 247 CW 150ish maintaining

    Remember the Gold is not in the prize it's in the Journey
    life may not be the Party we expected but while we are here we may as well dance

    parakeet210 replied to jis4judy's response:
    Hey Abby

    It's hard to climb out but if u write a small list like of three things,u would like to accomplish for the day coupled with exercise it helps a lot. Notice on the days u mow,how much more,u feel better!? Cuz the endorphins get to help u out!!

    I'm sorry ur I'm the hole. It sucks But know u don't have to keep suffering Take a small piece of action today ( one foot in from of the other).. U'll feel better. Keet
    There can be a lot of rain forecast (when it rains it pours). When this happens be a blessing for someone else.

    tweety 'keet'

    SW 262.2. GW. 170 CW 248.6
    mog1026 responded:
    Abby, don't despair. Life seems to go in cycles and change will come around for you. The one thing I'm sure of is NOTHING stays the same. Just do the best you can for now until you can do better. That's all anyone can ask of herself. For the time being try and listen to your head more than your feelings because you know what you should do. Xxoo
    Kathy SW 235.1 CW 208.6 GW 165

    Greedily she ingorg'd without restraint,
    And knew not eating Death
    Milton, Paradise Lost
    j9celeste responded:
    Hello there Abby

    I'm so sorry that you're suffering. I understand because I have these times too. It's hard to get out of this place, but you need to find a way.

    Why does your psychologist want to put you on meds? Do you have an illness that requires them? If you do, they might help you out. With my bi polar, without my meds I wouldn't get out of bed half of the time.

    Call some friends or family members. Watch a show you love. Read a good book. Try to get out of the house, even if you just stand in your yard for five minutes. Push yourself just a little bit today and see how it feels.

    Let us know how you're doing. We care.

    The most exciting, challenging, significant relationship you have is the one you have with yourself. And if you find someone who loves the you that YOU love, that's fabulous 297-6/6/14-CW 284 GW 165
    tnmist replied to j9celeste's response:
    Thank you, everyone. I'll be fine. Just a meltdown.
    rohvannyn replied to tnmist's response:
    I'm glad you'll be okay! We care about you.

    It's amazing how a person can be thrown off kilter by the simplest, seemingly insignificant things Anything from a nutrient deficiency to a lack of sleep to something bad in your tap water can really affect how easy it is to handle other stress. So when you get to a dark place, try to remember those little things that help you and your health, sometimes they can do a lot.

    Like sunlight! Just sitting out under the open sky can do wonders for your mood. Maybe not make you happy and shiny and cheerful and all that, but make it easier to deal with things at leats.

    'Your focus determines your reality.' -QGJ

    'Try not. Only do.' - Y

    Post reboot starting weight: 201.8 Current weight: 197.8 Goal: 140
    tnmist replied to rohvannyn's response:
    Thank you, ROH. My current situation is a hodge-podge of stuff, not just the wrist. I was just telling a friend on Saturday that, yes, the injury has changed the way I do a lot of things, but I'm grateful to have 4 limbs. A lot of people in the world are worse off than I am. No, the wrist injury and loss of career were the icing on the cake of life, LOL.

    Been on antidepressants for many years. Whenever I'm off I tend to nosedive, and that is why my doc is recommending that I get back on them so that I can do the things I know I need to do to have better health and life. It's a chemical imbalance. Insurance and finances are a mess, but I gotta bite the bullet anyway and pay for a doctor's visit to update my scripts. It is what it is. I will take care of things.

    I know sunshine, exercise, good nutrition, faith in God, etc., all help with depression. Sometimes a person still needs a med, too. I am one of those people. Just have to get back to reality, ha.

    Thanks for all the kinds words. Ya'll are doing great. I read most of the posts. Mostly I lurk. Can't really contribute these days. Ya'll are my encouragement. Knowing you don't give up helps me not to give up.

    Group hugs,
    ladylavender replied to tnmist's response:
    Er, Abby...Forgot to switch.
    Insanity: Doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. - Albert Einstein

    rohvannyn replied to tnmist's response:
    I totally understand that sometimes chemical imbalances need to be corrected. You have my sympathies. Most of my strategies don't involve a doctor because I cannot afford today's medical prices in today's economy, even with insurance, even if I had it. Not while supporting myself, anyway! But if you have a doctor who will at least see you, it's great you can get medication that will help correct the imbalance.

    'Your focus determines your reality.' -QGJ

    'Try not. Only do.' - Y

    Post reboot starting weight: 201.8 Current weight: 197.8 Goal: 140

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