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    Coping with weight gain- ANY ADVICE APPRECIATED
    120120120 posted:
    I struggled with anorexia this Summer, and after going to the hospital with a heart rate of 39, I am now recovering. I never really got into the full blown eating disorder, but I exercised way too much and was not eating sufficiently. It only happened basically over the course of one or two months in which I lost 27 pounds. I was burning more calories than I was eating. I say that I did not have a full blown eating disorder, because I had my passion for synchronized ice skating to motivate me to get better. I also left the program I was in after two days and did not feel the same as the other girls there. I now work with a nutritionist. My doctor says she wants me to get up to 120 pounds, and I am 5'2''. Right now I'm almost at 119 pounds, so I am very close. The problem for me is that I was never really at "too low of a weight." I got to 109 pounds, and that is a healthy weight for a 5'2'' girl. But because I am extremely athletic and I do not have my period, my doctor says I HAVE to weigh more than the average person, and I don't understand this. I tell myself that I look fine, but I am very uncomfortable with the weight gain. I also tell myself that I have a skewed perception of my body, and I really am not fat, BUT because I was not ever in a full blown disorder, I feel this is not valid, and I really am as heavy as I feel. I don't really tell anybody this in fear that they will not let me ice skate. Some nights I get so frustrated with the fact that I have to gain weight. It's just not fair. Any advice would be helpful, thank you
    msjess17 responded:
    Hi... I am definitely no expert but I have been in a similar situation when I started my recovery. I had suffered from a mixture of eating disorders that landed me in the hospital w/ kidney failure and several other prob. Even though my situation was different, I found myself struggling mentally with the weight gain. Thats the worst part I think of any eating disorder...the mental thoughts that seem unstoppable. Professionals are great to talk to one on one and the best part is what is said in the room stays there. anybody with any type of eating disorder deserve to be in a safe place to talk about it whether the eating disorder is mild or severe. I think talking or typing in this case helps filter the bad thoughts and keep the mind focused...thats just my opinion.

    Good luck and best wishes!!
    120120120 replied to msjess17's response:
    Thanks so much! Yeah, I think it's just nice to talk about it

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