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Desperate for talk
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mmmcwhorter1973 posted:
I am a single mother of a 17 yr old daughter with bipolar with rapid cycles. I have some support but also deal with others saying "sounds like a teenager to me" but its not. She has been diagnosed since 15 and finally agreed to medication within the past year. It affects her life so much that she chose to drop school and get her GED (which she did very fast) tried college but medication changes and adjustments made it to difficult. She really wants to work but also admits medications and changes affect her in so many ways she does not know if she can handle it. ANXIETY plays a big role in her day and takes PRN meds. for that. We are now at the point of her having extreme frustration with medication making her tired and ruling her whole day and now the doc wants her to increase to taking in morning and night (SHE REFUSED) she has decided she wants to try a completely different medication. I love her dearly and this sounds bad to say but sometimes I really miss the child I had before all this. I am accepting of her mental illness but truly feel out there alone as a parent worried about the well being of her child and having it hurt me to watch her have to struggle with docs, medication, moods and usual everyday life. I am a nurse so at times I struggle with separating the nurse and mom role. I am proud of her she is a 17 yr old trying to understand and take control of her illness. Society is hard enough on our children without adding more struggles to it. I worry if she will be able to actually work and the life she desires. When she gets down she is extremely hard on herself. Sometimes I am truly at a loss for words because I don't have all the answers she seeks, I CAN'T MAKE THIS GO AWAY like I could for her when she was younger. I wish I could find a group for parents with BP teenagers a place to share a place to look some in the eyes and talk. On-line support groups are great and I hope I can find my place somewhere. I have always been her parent but also her friend. I feel I have done something wrong I am constantly told I have not and I try very hard to keep in my mind we can only make the best with the cards we are dealt not get new ones, I am a firm believer that anything is possible, I find myself looking for that guiding light which I hope shows up soon.
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luvurkids responded:
I wish I could find a group too! I have a 17 year old son and a 9 year old daughter both diagnosed recently with bipolar.. I feel your pain..I am sorry...I am so glad I came across these message boards..it helps me..I am also a nurse, and it is very hard to separate the mom and nurse role. We as mothers just want to kiss them and tell them it will be okay,just like we did when they were small. My daughter who is nine,breaks my heart...she is not even the same person anymore...it hurts. we will get through this storm ....and so will they with us by their side.i hope youind a support group..I hope Id o too! before I loose my mind.. thanks for sharing your story ..please update if you find a group or any changes


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