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    I am too tired to care
    Old1now posted:
    There is so much I have to do but I am so tired. I suppose it is depression but I am just too tired to care. It's a vicious circle. Yesterday I had a doctors appointment after work. I only work part time,4 hours, but I waited in the doctor's office 3 hours. OK. None of it was hard labor. I enjoy my job. I read a book in the doctor's office. Still I felt so exhausted I wanted to cry. Instead I bought a half gallon of ice cream AND ate it. My head knows that was not really helpful but I don't care. I still don't care. I am so tired. I would think I was completely nuts if it were not for these discussions. That one day of mostly sitting could exhaust me so completely doesn't seem reasonable. But I know others like me can't even do that much. Thanks for being there.
    crazytaurenswife responded:
  • hugs* I hope you're able to get some rest tonight, so you'll feel better tomorrow. For me, the exhaustion usually kicks in when I'm stressed and feeling like I won't be able to get things done. I would have been in horrible shape if I'd have had to wait 3 hours to see my doctor! Try to not feel too bad about eating things you shouldn't. That will just add guilty feelings to what you're already upset about. (Now if I can learn that lesson... ).

    ~air hugs~

    sharonjohnson44 replied to crazytaurenswife's response:
    Old1now-I can fully understand about being to tired to care. I have been dealing with this for 2 years now, and most days I am to tired to care about anything. I am also going throught the testing for Lupus now and will find out some more results on the 15th.
    Trying not to let this get me too down though. I spent 20 years on antidepressants and don't want to go back there again. Today is a new day and I also switched the way that I am taking my nerve medication and added St. John's Wort to replase Valerin root. I take 6 nerve pills a day so now it will be 2 morning, 2 afternoon plus a St. John's wort, and 2 in the evening. I am keeping my fingers crossed that it will help with the pain and the constant tired feeling. I also take time out for myself each day and take a long hot shower every morning (no one in my house can shower right after me, it will be cold).
    I wish that I could work part time but my job is full time, so you are very lucky there. 3 hours to wait at the doctor's..always bring a book, good advice...
    Hope this helps a little, hang in there it is almost the weekend.
    1wareaglefan responded:
    "I understand," she said as she popped 2 peanut butter m&m's in her mouth! I really do. I've been so wiped out emotionally and physically here lately. I just sit, propped up in bed, on the computer. That's when I don't have anyplace to be, so it's not everyday.

    I'm still recovering from knee replacement, so that takes a good bit out of me, plus the fibro, plus this heat....ack!!

    I don't have any advice. I just wanted to tell you I understand, and I do the eating thing, too!
    xperky responded:
    I understand because a day with a doctor's appointment always wipes me out. I do get stressed about the visits, so that's something to do with it.

    Ice cream...I wish I had some right now too!
    With Compassion,
    winkydink52 replied to xperky's response:
    I can totally get this post, too!! I've been taking my husband to doc appt's for months now. His visits are about an hour away, on freeway driving, and I feel like I've been run over by a semi by the time I get there and back!!
    Actually, he was in the hospital for a procedure last weekend, and his brother took him, and I didn't even go down to see him. It was storming here, and I can't see well at night, so we both agreed that it wouldn't be in my best interest. I felt horrible, but in a way, it was a relief not to have to drive so far again!! Isn't that awful?? This disease takes away our lives and turns us into selfish people at times. So thankful my husband understands. And at least I was able to pick him up the next day....about the ice cream: don't even get me started!! Thanks to the Cymbalta, I've gained almost 30# in the last few years, and ice cream is my favorite drug of choice!!
    hop63 responded:
    Dear Old1. Know exactly how you feel. What is your diagnosis? Chronic Fatigue or Fibromyalgia or both. For years doctors tried to convince me depression made me tired. I knew that being tired all the time made me feel depressed. That is the key with chronic conditions. You know you are not able yo live the life you once did and want to return to. There are medications to improve your wakefulness and concentration. I used to be able to stay awake for 3 hours at a time. My doctor recommended Provigil. I still get very tired but I work full-time and keep up with the basics such as laundry, meals and light cleaning. There are days I can't accomplish everything I plan to do but they are fewer in number. Other people that post here take Nuvigil. It is similar to Provigil but I can't remember chemistry well enough to try to explain. Many doctors start with Ritalin or Adderal to improve wakefulness and concentration. I am not promising that you will be running a marathon or working double shifts but I think it is worth a conversation with your doctor. Please let me and everyone else that posts on this site what your doctor says. If he/she refuses please move on. Your doctor does not understand your illness. ((hugs)) good luck!!!
    maryalc replied to hop63's response:
    Hi all on Sunday afternoon, I sure understand everyone's posts on the feelings about being too tired to care, and all that goes with it. Today I needed not 1, but 2 naps. I was hungry several times, so ate. No ice cream yet! For me, to eat a lot, means I am upset, and taking care of my self at the moment. It may not be the very best choice- such as a half gallon of ice cream at once, but it is something I try not to yell at myself about any more. When I am that tired, I am not sure my brain is really capable of making the best decision at the time. If I can, I will try to do what has helped me in the past. Nap, eat what is going to make me feel the best later, etc. If not, just do what I do, and hope for a better day tomorrow.
    I have had CF/FM for more than 30 years, and it still can mystify me! My husband is aging, as I am (!) and some days fear about the changes that go with this really make the day hard. It is so good to share, and know we are not alone in the fatigue and pain. Thanks all for writing what is going on. Mary
    hop63 replied to maryalc's response:
    My day of killer fatigue was Saturday. Got up at 8AM. Struggled through until noon. Napped until 4 PM. Ate take out- when you are this tired who can prepare a healthy meal or even care. Was back to sleep by 7PM. Except getting up to go to the bathroom, mostly slept until 8AM Sunday. What a productive 24 hours. I was awake for 7 hours! As Maryalc said CFS and Fibro never ceases to amaze me either. I was diagnosed 19 years ago and still don't know what to expect next. Pain, fatigue, loss of a social life, inability to plan ahead because you never know what tomorrow or one hour from now will feel like. So glad I have all of you here to reassure me that I am not losing my mind like the first dozen or so doctors I saw almost 20 years ago. ((hugs)) to all and a wakeful pain free tomorrow.
    Old1now replied to hop63's response:
    Thank you for your Suggestions. My doctor ordered provigil but my insurance refused. I went to Mexico to get it cheaper but I didn't do well on it and I can't be sure I got the real thing. It helped for about 3 hours but left me exhausted when it wore off.
    hop63 replied to Old1now's response:
    Old 1, I know many insurances refuse to pay high cost for provigil. My Dr. wrote something about how all the cheaper alternatives did not work for me. Each year I have to be re-approved for the medication. I am concerned that you purchased it from Mexico but understand why you did as it is very expensive. Was it the correct dosage? Usual dose is 200 mg. I can see where you would feel exhausted when it wore off but it should have given you more than 3 hours of "energy". I don't suppose your insurance would cover Nuvigil because it is very similar to Provigil. Did you ever try meds used for Attention Deficit Disorder such as Ritalin or Adderall? There are others, much cheaper and many insurance companies will cover the cost. They are not as long acting as Provigil. Wish you had been able to try the "real thing". Visit their website-sometimes you can get a coupon for a 7 day free trial. Then have your Dr write script for one week supply. I know this is not a long term solution but at least you will know if it does work for you. Hope you find a helpful medication. Please let me know if any of these suggestions were helpful. (( hugs))
    clkwc1964 responded:
    Can so relate at times. Hang in there and know you are not alone. I will keep you in my prayers. Cat:0)

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