Do we ever get a life??
winkydink52 posted:
This has been my worst summer ever! Although summers are usually bad in the SW, I've had enormous stress added, and the CFS has kicked my rear harder than usual, too. My DH had a cancerous tumor removed, along with half his pancreas and all his spleen in May.
He's barely coming around now, after horrid pain and nausea-he lost nearly 50 pounds in just 2 months! And now we've been told the cancer may have moved into his brain.
So, besides the 'normal' FB, CFS, I'm dealing with the stress of watching my husband in extreme pain, and as a retired RN, feeling helpless and at times almost hopeless.
I'm trying so hard to keep a 'firm upper lip', and so many have chipped in to help. Just a day or so not having to drive across town is a blessing! But I've hit bottom and wonder if we'll ever have a life together, and once he gets well, if I'LL ever be worth anything!
FYI: I've had this cruddy disease for 7 years now, but after being in bed most of this week, I'm just about to throw in the towel on any hope that it ever gets better....Thanks for reading!!
He's barely coming around now, after horrid pain and nausea-he lost nearly 50 pounds in just 2 months! And now we've been told the cancer may have moved into his brain.
So, besides the 'normal' FB, CFS, I'm dealing with the stress of watching my husband in extreme pain, and as a retired RN, feeling helpless and at times almost hopeless.
I'm trying so hard to keep a 'firm upper lip', and so many have chipped in to help. Just a day or so not having to drive across town is a blessing! But I've hit bottom and wonder if we'll ever have a life together, and once he gets well, if I'LL ever be worth anything!
FYI: I've had this cruddy disease for 7 years now, but after being in bed most of this week, I'm just about to throw in the towel on any hope that it ever gets better....Thanks for reading!!
8 Replies |Watch This Discussion | Report This| Share this:Do we ever get a life??This has been my worst summer ever! Although summers are usually bad in the SW, I've had enormous stress added, and the CFS has kicked my rear harder than usual, too. My DH had a cancerous tumor removed, along with half his pancreas and all his spleen in May. <br />He's barely coming around now, after horrid pain and nausea-he lost nearly 50 pounds in just 2 months! And now we've been told the cancer may have moved into his brain.<br />So, besides the 'normal' FB, CFS, I'm dealing with the stress of watching my husband in extreme pain, and as a retired RN, feeling helpless and at times almost hopeless.<br />I'm trying so hard to keep a 'firm upper lip', and so many have chipped in to help. Just a day or so not having to drive across town is a blessing! But I've hit bottom and wonder if we'll ever have a life together, and once he gets well, if I'LL ever be worth anything!<br />FYI: I've had this cruddy disease for 7 years now, but after being in bed most of this week, I'm just about to throw in the towel on any hope that it ever gets better....Thanks for reading!!
xperky responded:
I believe you will feel better when your stress levels are reduced. It is so very difficult to watch a loved one suffer from pain. Please keep hoping for the best.
With Compassion,
Margaret
Margaret
Report This| Share this:Do we ever get a life??I believe you will feel better when your stress levels are reduced. It is so very difficult to watch a loved one suffer from pain. Please keep hoping for the best.
Caprice_WebMD_Staff responded:
I'm so sorry to hear all you're dealing with right now. No wonder you're having such a hard time coping. (((((softhugs))))
I'm glad you have a lot of support around you. Yes, things will get better eventually but it sounds like you have a long road ahead of you still so try to take it one day at a time. Be careful about judging your future by how things are right now and take care of yourself as much as you can and continue to let others lend a hand.
I'm glad you have a lot of support around you. Yes, things will get better eventually but it sounds like you have a long road ahead of you still so try to take it one day at a time. Be careful about judging your future by how things are right now and take care of yourself as much as you can and continue to let others lend a hand.
We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us. ~Joseph Campbell
Report This| Share this:Do we ever get a life??I'm so sorry to hear all you're dealing with right now. No wonder you're having such a hard time coping. (((((softhugs))))<br /><br />I'm glad you have a lot of support around you. Yes, things will get better eventually but it sounds like you have a long road ahead of you still so try to take it one day at a time. Be careful about judging your future by how things are right now and take care of yourself as much as you can and continue to let others lend a hand.
Dollbug responded:
Hello and welcome..MiMi in NC...sounds like you have a lot on your plate...and as you know...stress and the wrath of the dragon, aka FM...are best of friends...they love to catch us FMers off guard....Nana B calls it draggin the dragon...it does get tough...
I do hope you DH is now recovering and I hope he will continue to get stronger as time passes...My DH is a cancer survivor and I can relate to what this kind of stress can do to you..try to stay positive though and stay strong...take care of you also so you can also help him..
Sleep is so very important...it is a tough time to sleep and get enough rest when a person is so stressful.
I would like to encourage you to be sure and ask your doctor to check your Vitamin D level...which is so important for a lot of people these days...low Vitamin D can cause additional pain for some of us...and it can also affect other illnesses as well.
I hope you will continue to post here...we are open 24/7 for the most part...and there is normally someone here most of the time.
I wish you both well....May GOD comfort you both and provide you both with strength each and every day....
when you have a not too good day...just remember that tomorrow hopefully will be a better day...
Take care and good luck...
MiMi
I do hope you DH is now recovering and I hope he will continue to get stronger as time passes...My DH is a cancer survivor and I can relate to what this kind of stress can do to you..try to stay positive though and stay strong...take care of you also so you can also help him..
Sleep is so very important...it is a tough time to sleep and get enough rest when a person is so stressful.
I would like to encourage you to be sure and ask your doctor to check your Vitamin D level...which is so important for a lot of people these days...low Vitamin D can cause additional pain for some of us...and it can also affect other illnesses as well.
I hope you will continue to post here...we are open 24/7 for the most part...and there is normally someone here most of the time.
I wish you both well....May GOD comfort you both and provide you both with strength each and every day....
when you have a not too good day...just remember that tomorrow hopefully will be a better day...
Take care and good luck...
MiMi
IN GOD WE TRUST....MAY GOD BLESS AND GUIDE AMERICA....
My personal exchanges are Vitamin D and Pain and Wrath of the Dragon....if you care to visit..
My personal exchanges are Vitamin D and Pain and Wrath of the Dragon....if you care to visit..
Report This| Share this:Do we ever get a life??<b>Hello and welcome..MiMi in NC...sounds like you have a lot on your plate...and as you know...stress and the wrath of the dragon, aka FM...are best of friends...they love to catch us FMers off guard....Nana B calls it draggin the dragon...it does get tough...</b><br /><b></b> <br /><b>I do hope you DH is now recovering and I hope he will continue to get stronger as time passes...My DH is a cancer survivor and I can relate to what this kind of stress can do to you..try to stay positive though and stay strong...take care of you also so you can also help him..</b><br /><b></b> <br /><b>Sleep is so very important...it is a tough time to sleep and get enough rest when a person is so stressful. </b><br /><b></b> <br /><b>I would like to encourage you to be sure and ask your doctor to check your Vitamin D level...which is so important for a lot of people these days...low Vitamin D can cause additional pain for some of us...and it can also affect other illnesses as well. </b><br /><b></b> <br /><b>I hope you will continue to post here...we are open 24/7 for the most part...and there is normally someone here most of the time. </b><br /><b></b> <br /><b>I wish you both well....May GOD comfort you both and provide you both with strength each and every day....</b><br /><b>when you have a not too good day...just remember that tomorrow hopefully will be a better day...</b><br /><b></b> <br /><b>Take care and good luck...</b><br /><b></b> <br /><b></b> <br /><b>MiMi </b><br /><b></b>
Anon_2912 responded:
Life?? It's what you make it mentally.
Many deal with traumas in life that change their entire world. What we have to remember is somethings are just not in our control. You can give in to life's tragedy/circumstances or continue to live. You can lay in bed all day & cry but reality is IT WILL NOT CHANGE "the hand you are dealt".
Stress & depression only compounds the pain. Live your life like it is your last day on earth, and in some ways we don't know that it isn't. Enjoy YOURSELF & your HUSBAND....
Many deal with traumas in life that change their entire world. What we have to remember is somethings are just not in our control. You can give in to life's tragedy/circumstances or continue to live. You can lay in bed all day & cry but reality is IT WILL NOT CHANGE "the hand you are dealt".
Stress & depression only compounds the pain. Live your life like it is your last day on earth, and in some ways we don't know that it isn't. Enjoy YOURSELF & your HUSBAND....
Report This| Share this:Do we ever get a life??Life?? It's what you make it mentally. <br /> <br />Many deal with traumas in life that change their entire world. What we have to remember is somethings are just not in our control. You can give in to life's tragedy/circumstances or continue to live. You can lay in bed all day & cry but reality is IT WILL NOT CHANGE "the hand you are dealt". <br /> <br />Stress & depression only compounds the pain. Live your life like it is your last day on earth, and in some ways we don't know that it isn't. Enjoy YOURSELF & your HUSBAND....
sexymamma12 replied to Anon_2912's response:
I totally agree with you I got fired last week, have been sick with an sinus and ear infection but I am still moving. I do what I have to when I have to. I have to support my family and take care of my mom. When things get real tough I find that if you lay down you won't get back up. Depression can kill you if you let it. We all humans are capable of being depressed at one point in our lives. We all need family and social support to get through it. I do take life one day at at time. Since I have no job I am enjoying my kids and my husband.
Report This| Share this:Do we ever get a life??I totally agree with you I got fired last week, have been sick with an sinus and ear infection but I am still moving. I do what I have to when I have to. I have to support my family and take care of my mom. When things get real tough I find that if you lay down you won't get back up. Depression can kill you if you let it. We all humans are capable of being depressed at one point in our lives. We all need family and social support to get through it. I do take life one day at at time. Since I have no job I am enjoying my kids and my husband.
Anon_2912 replied to sexymamma12's response:
Enjoy the kids, because they grow up so fast....
My son graduated back in June from HS & moved out on his own & starts college on Aug. 27...(community college).
The years fly...He is our only child but I actually handled him going out on his own pretty well, at least did not cry in front of him...
My son graduated back in June from HS & moved out on his own & starts college on Aug. 27...(community college).
The years fly...He is our only child but I actually handled him going out on his own pretty well, at least did not cry in front of him...
Report This| Share this:Do we ever get a life??Enjoy the kids, because they grow up so fast....<br /> <br />My son graduated back in June from HS & moved out on his own & starts college on Aug. 27...(community college).<br /> <br />The years fly...He is our only child but I actually handled him going out on his own pretty well, at least did not cry in front of him...
Booch007 responded:
So much on your plate. The energy needed to care for DH is so much, my heart goes out to you......
I can't offer a tool here or a fix, I can give a ((hug)) and a shoulder to say I know this road and it is so hard. Keep an eye on your sleep and your intake....make sure you get a bit of time for YOU.....a meditative window to hear beautiful music, flowers in your day and reminisce the GOOD TIMES often.
Count your blessings and joy as often as you can, or you will be in the negative all the time.
So glad you shared the nursing background, so you have an edge to look at things a bit different....but living such hell is not easy.
I will keep you in myheart to hope for a positive to come your way. You are putting out 24/7 right now:(.
All my best, Nancy B
I can't offer a tool here or a fix, I can give a ((hug)) and a shoulder to say I know this road and it is so hard. Keep an eye on your sleep and your intake....make sure you get a bit of time for YOU.....a meditative window to hear beautiful music, flowers in your day and reminisce the GOOD TIMES often.
Count your blessings and joy as often as you can, or you will be in the negative all the time.
So glad you shared the nursing background, so you have an edge to look at things a bit different....but living such hell is not easy.
I will keep you in myheart to hope for a positive to come your way. You are putting out 24/7 right now:(.
All my best, Nancy B
Report This| Share this:Do we ever get a life??So much on your plate. The energy needed to care for DH is so much, my heart goes out to you......<br /> <br />I can't offer a tool here or a fix, I can give a ((hug)) and a shoulder to say I know this road and it is so hard. Keep an eye on your sleep and your intake....make sure you get a bit of time for YOU.....a meditative window to hear beautiful music, flowers in your day and reminisce the GOOD TIMES often.<br /> <br />Count your blessings and joy as often as you can, or you will be in the negative all the time.<br /> <br />So glad you shared the nursing background, so you have an edge to look at things a bit different....but living such hell is not easy.<br /> <br />I will keep you in myheart to hope for a positive to come your way. You are putting out 24/7 right now:(.<br /> <br />All my best, Nancy B
Nononsenselady responded:
My mother always said "this too will pass". It really helps me in the roughest times. Kind of a stoic way of looking at things, but it makes you realize you have been through tough times before and you will do it again. We humans are really incredible, like rubber balls.
Report This| Share this:Do we ever get a life??My mother always said "this too will pass". It really helps me in the roughest times. Kind of a stoic way of looking at things, but it makes you realize you have been through tough times before and you will do it again. We humans are really incredible, like rubber balls.
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