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    Do you ever get a break from pain?
    slovene54 posted:
    I'm just curious if in between flare up days do you have no pain or just less pain? I can't remember a day I haven't had pain in the last 5-6 years. Just curious if its the same for everyone.
    dawncostella responded:
    Well...for me...I am never without pain. I have my really bad days and then I have very few good days. My good good days are just that my pain isn't unbearable. But I am NEVER without any pain.
    crystalgreeneyes replied to dawncostella's response:
    I have pain every day all the time. The only time I don't feel it is when I am sleeping. Don't do much of that either. There are days when it's bearable. I think I have almost become used to it now,
    foreversore responded:
    I never have a day without pain. I can't even remember the last time my pain was bearable. I feel like I am very slowly going insane and no one cares enough to do anything about it.
    painfullyexhausted responded:
    I'm not sure if anyone is ever completely pain free. I agree with what the others said about good and bad days. My good days, pain is not in my face bad but it's there where as my bad days the pain is my focal point because I can't get away from it.

    I always have aches somewhere that at best feel like pulled muscles or sore joints which is tolerable most of the time. I don't have a lot of days like this but thank God for the reprieve. I personally believe that because flares are so bad and consume so much of my life that when I have less pain it is more tolerable even though I still feel 95 yrs old and probably look that way too !

    For me, my FM has gotten worse the older I get so what isn't a big deal now with pain probably was a few years ago, if that makes sense. I can tell you that good days for me are far and few between but maybe could be more often if I didn't over extend myself while feeling good. After all these years you would think that I would know better. There's so much to do and I hate not being able to do it. I had a good day yesterday so I finished christmas shopping, wrapping, put the tree up, and cleaned up the house. Today, I went to work, this evening I feel like I was hit by a bus. I have no one to blame but myself !! Pace, pace, pace, is obviously not in my vocabulary.

    I guess I made a short reply into a story, sorry ! Hope you can find more good days in the near future, those bad ones seem to drag on forever.

    Best of luck....
    painfullyexhausted replied to foreversore's response:
    Awwww, sorry you feel that way. I do hope that you have some one that can help you out, even if it's just to vent. I completely understand where you're coming from though. It's so darn hard to feel like people care when you're down and out because if they haven't experienced what you're going through they just can't relate. They don't see the pain so they can't grasp the difficulty of having FM.

    It's not just the pain, it's the emotional side of things as well. Chronic pain will drive you insane. It's always there, it always needs attention, and it doesn't allow you to be the person you really are. It's debilitating in so many ways.

    About a month ago, I had 2 good days in a row. Less pain and had slept for about 5 hours both nights. I was on top of the world ! My husband said, "you seem so happy and you're in such a good mood". I was like wow ! That was only 2 days, can you imagine if I had a week ? It was nice of him to notice after all he is my biggest fan through good times and bad but it was also very depressing because I realized what a downer I am all the time. He would never, ever, make me feel less than perfect but wow ! That was a huge eye opener.

    I long for those lost days. I want "me" back ! I would do anything to be able to feel normal again. As much as we all try not to show how we feel, it's almost inevitable because we live with this miserable mystery every day..for the rest of our lives. This is so difficult not to mention depressing so please know that you're not alone. We don't want to sit around and feel sorry for ourselves but some times that's what we end up doing. I think it's just human nature. I'm not ashamed to say that I have pity parties for myself. I do, then I move on until I hit a wall and then the party happens all over again.

    I do hope that you feel better soon and get to experience some good days.

    Best of luck...
    foreversore replied to painfullyexhausted's response:
    I am very lucky that my husband and daughter are supportive and wonderful. It's the doctors that don't much seem to care how I feel or how I am doing. There have been so many stressors hovering over my family and household as of late and today we had another really big one thrown at us and it has me at my breaking point. i wouldn't hurt myself or my family but my sanity is definitely hanging by a thread. I guess I just need to be more adamant with my doctors and find a way to impart upon them just how serious my situation is. I could go to the ER for immediate help but their first and only reaction is a 30 day involuntary psych hold in their psych ward and I don't want to be there during the holidays. I will call my doctor in the morning and try to get an emergency appointment. I am trying to use my pets and the internet as a distraction to get me through the night.
    slovene54 replied to painfullyexhausted's response:
    I have the same problem with pacing myself!! If I feel good I'm going to try to do everything I can. Then usually suffer later. Thanks for all the responses. Still trying to understand all of it. I also have other medical conditions so it's hard to tell whats bothering me because of what.
    agrapina replied to slovene54's response:
    I would have to say, No, I am never without pain. It has only gotten steadily worse year after year.

    If my pain lifts somewhat I also get extremely happy. I mean it's silly how happy I get even though I know it won't last that long.

    Really, chronic pain weighs us down and any relief at all feels like such a tremendous weight is lifted from us. It doesn't happen very often but I always take the most advantage of it by getting things done and then I feel so proud of myself.

    It's kind of pitiful that I would rather mop under the bed than plan something fun.
    painfullyexhausted replied to foreversore's response:
    Hi foreversore,

    Just checking in with you. I hope that your night went well and you're feeling a little better today. I would hate to see you anywhere but home for the holidays as well but remember your health is the most important thing, there will be more holidays to be enjoyed.

    I recently started on new meds and have been up and down emotional myself lately, I just hope it's because they haven't had time to start working. I'm wanting to just hang out in bed lately. As soon as I get home from work, I'm ready to lay down and I just want to be left alone. It may be due to the hassle of the holidays wearing on me because I'm feeling exhausted plus, I did way too much a few days ago. Afraid I may have sent myself into flare mode.

    As far as you go, make sure your talking to your family about how you feel so they can be on the same page and keep an eye on you. Even with a great, supportive family it can still be difficult because they can't feel what your going through physically or emotionally. I do find that talking to everyone here is helpful, takes my mind off of ME for a bit.

    Stay strong, I hope you feel better soon.

    Best of luck....
    foreversore replied to painfullyexhausted's response:
    Thanks for checking in on me. My husband makes it a point to check on me several times a day even when he is at work. He is very perceptive and he often knows my mood before i figure it out. He is so in tune with me. i think I just need a major med adjustment. I need better pain control and better depression/anxiety control too. i am waiting for my doc office to call me back with an appointment time. i am still having big issues with sleep, mainly not getting enough of it.

    My hope for all of you that are new to this is that you have better luck in the trial and error process for meds than I have. i am unfortunately a medicaid patient and medicaid dictates what medications I get to try and how long I have to try them for before my doc can change them. they have taken almost all decisions away from my doctor and myself as far as my health and well being are concerned. The state I live in is (I swear) one of the most corrupt in the union and we the citizens suffer for it. i would love to leave this state but I would have a custody battle for my 10 yr old on my hands if I tried to leave the state so I feel stuck.

    i am and will continue to hang in there...I'm just waiting for the medication rollercoaster to slow down or even come to a stop. A stop on what works for me when we find it.
    painfullyexhausted replied to foreversore's response:
    The important thing is that you can recognize that your meds aren't working and you need adjustments. A lot of people don't get this, therefore they get in trouble with depression. I'm so glad that you have a wonderful husband that you can rely on, I wish others had people in their lives that special. That kind of support is a definite must !!!

    It is so ridiculous what people go through to get help with our gov't dollars. So sorry that you have to deal with this. I have no insurance so I feel a little "stuck" at times as well. It's expensive to be ill lol. I have applied for help but apparently when you work you don't deserve help in my state. I make too much money, really ? They obviously don't pay my bills.

    I'm having a really hard time with this Christmas thing this year as well. I'm over it, it's become such a hassle and impossible to enjoy. It's all about everyone else and making things perfect...yuck !! I do enjoy giving, that's just my personality but it's so exhausting at times. I'm worn out and don't much care. What I have done, is it. Take it or leave it, I can do no more. It'll work out it always does so I'm not going to stress about it anymore. Ok, I've taken enough of your time. Keep your chin up.

    Best of luck....
    jennagale76 replied to painfullyexhausted's response:
    No, I never get a break in pain. Some days it's worse and some days it's better, but NEVER gone. On my good days I tend to overdo it as well, I feel so good, happy, and motivated I can't help it. I did have one day this fall that I woke up totally pain free. I was amazed! It only lasted a few hours though. Good luck in finding what works for you.
    missshortyd replied to jennagale76's response:
    There is never a day I don't hurt somewhere. I have been in a bad flare for about two weeks my jaw and gums hurt so I could not sleep last nite, my neck arms and shoulder hurt and feel like their on fire I can't lift my arms above my head without pain my legs and my butt hurt.I think it's the stress of the hoilday's but who knows. It's just a day in the life of someone with FM.


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