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    As Stress Rockets Fm Rockets Again
    dakotaspirit1957 posted:
    My X-DIL has returned from her flash trip to Florida and everything is utter chaos... My grandson who refused to speak to her while she was gone for he was mad she left ad felt deserted was still having a lot of anxiety about it... And she was over compensating for it by allowing him to break every rule in our home during her visitation visit last night... When I mentioned the kids were't allowed to do karati in our home she said she gave them permission until he left... As I pointed out to my son that is not respecting him nor me and our home... This is not her home... I didn't argue just asked them not to do it around me and my grandson immediately turned and kicked his mom who laughed and laughed louder when I said to him that he wasn't showing me respect by not listening to me just because his mom was around...

    Later tho... The real problem hit... I was putting away some clothes for the kids and she took a light weight lacy skirt out to ask Hailey where she got it from... She said I bought it for her ad she said a sarcastic I should have known...She proceeded into promising her she could wear it today... Hailey told me she was going to wear it cuz mommy said she can... I said we will see how cold it is... Well mommy kept going ad I kept saying we will see... Finally I lost it... Started screaming at my X-DIL that we will see about the weather... and she started yelling back...

    She finally said the clincher... The woman who has left and deserted my son and grandchildren 4 times now is yelling at me she can tell her children what to do for she is her mother... I told her that she isn't here to deal with her I am... and she told me I made sure she wasn't here... It was my fault she isn't here... I made sure of that... I simply looked at her and stated that I never once told her to leave the 4 times she did...

    So the kids now think I sent their mom away and are trying to take her place according to them... I decided that I won't allow her or anyone else to destroy my relationship with my grandchildren... And my son...

    So I have ranted... I am an anxious machine today... And I need to let my computer wiz try to get my keyboard fixed... I bought a wireless keyboard cus my laptop keyboard is malfunctioning and it hooked up fine but whe I closed the laptop to carry it out to the garage this morig it would't register... So I called my buddy... lol... And he is here..

    Thanks for letting me vent.. I will see you all later...

    Take care... Love... Jan/Dakota
    dollbug responded:
    Hello Jan.....I have to laugh...just at the *situation at hand you are dealing with*....let me son's x and her family have blamed him for *everything*...and they continue to do so...and he has done *nothing*.

    So I do know exactly how you feel. I have told him many times to just ignor them. It is odd though at some of the things that they have blamed him with. It has gotten really bad. And the sad thing is this...the last straw was when they *included* my daughter in all of the shenanigans, (this is what I call this)...well, let me tell you that when the x and her family included my I said....they should have thought about what they were doing BEFORE they did this. They ended up bringing law enforcement into the picture and violating her constitutional rights...NOT a good thing to do.

    I posted an O/T post a fews days ago..providing a bit of actually part of what took place....if you care to read it.

    I am so sorry that you are having to deal with all of this. I hope you will not allow her to treat you this way. It is sad that she has taken advantage of both you and your son like she has. I can assure you that one day the children will know....they will grow up and know exactly who took care of them while the mother was NOT there.

    Take care and good luck.


    My personal exchanges are Vitamin D and Pain and Wrath of the Dragon....if you care to visit..
    dakotaspirit1957 replied to dollbug's response:
    Thank you Mimi and I have honestly thought of you several times during this ordeal with her... I know personally what others can do to try to tear grandparents away from grandchildren for it happened with my other 5... The welfare system tried to get my grandchildren in NM to say that their parents and I were abusing and neglecting them... I had to go a long time without contacting them... Now they are back home and it is as if it never happened... I praise God for the love we have always shared.... It was strong enough to see us thru... And they never faltered..

    I have now seen them 3 times since them and they have never been anything but loving... In fact I kept 2 of them for a month last summer and it was wonderful...

    I pray that this doesn't go as far as she is threatening... But I am hopefully prepared for it if she does go to the state with any complaints... I just don't trat her..or her inside inside aide... My X-Husbands new wife... My new threat to my grandchildren... But that is a new message... And a new worry...

    Well... for just wanting to thank you Mimi I took off again... I am sorry... I guess I need to rant yet... lol... It is just I have practically been more a mother to these 2 then be a grandmother... And I don't know what to think... do... or feel... anymore... l and maybe I am more protective then usual with them... But Irene my daughter thinks I am treating them equally with hers... I was helping with hers too for she was the first one to have me stay with her when I came here and got sick... And was thankful enough with hers and appreciated the time I shared and share with hers too... And... We must have bonded quite well... For even the brainwashing of constant badgering from DPS didn't make them change and not love me...

    So when Ethan and Haileys mom tells them I am an evil witch and they should stay away from me... I hear I love you a thousand more times... And Even tho they don't really know what to think they at 4 and 5 don't want to believe I am anything but their Nany...

    I cried when they told me that yesterday... I cried a lot yesterday... Mostly for what they are going thru then what I am... They should be happy and secure at this age... Not staying up half the night watching out for their Nany to turn into some monster.... Like their sick Mommy told them she does...

    Yes someday they will look back and know the truth... but do I want them to know the lies and games their games their "loving" mother is playing with them... No... I don't want them to look back and think like my granddaughter already feels... It is their fault Mommy hated Nany cuz Nany felt she "HAD" to take her place... And Nany felt she hated Mommy like Mommy said cuz she did... But whats worse then all that... Shall my adult grandchildren of these precious 4 and 5 yr olds look back and feel the guilt they feel now that their mommy didn't love them enough to stay with them... and love them enough to not try to tear the only security they have ever known in their lives apart... I lived thru something like that and it took me years to become a survivor...

    Thanks... Love... Jan/Dakota

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