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    Hi All...
    dakotaspirit1957 posted:
    & off to my day... I haven't quite figured out yet when I am going to the hospital... My son is on vacation for a week now... My youngest one that is a manager of a pizza hut... He asked for personal time last week and this is the best they could do... So he has bee running like a mad man... Working... keeping track of the 2 kids & my hectic schedule at the hospital... He hasn't been able to spend but a few minutes since it happened with his brother... Today is a busy day for him but after he gets his daughter o the bus & some touch ups at work so he leaves things well organized he will be at the hospital... It has been hard on him...

    Well... That loosens some on the time table but great-ens the worry... My granddaughter is over at her mom' & she is staying there for she is sick... no school again today... & she hates to be there when she is sick... cries for her daddy... He just talked to her on the phone & she is calmer now... Just a cold with a low grade fever so far... He is running her over some meds... Then off to his dr... Then off to the hospital I go I think... The he has another appointment and then work for a bit... The the hospital...

    My son has some friends that are thinking about moving in and helping out... They will babysit for free & pay a little rent... That way I won't have to do it all & it won't be left to Richie when he returns... They are real nice... In a bad place now... turning all their money over to her mom for rent & board right now... Even has to find transportation to work... He works with my son & it is closer to work here... & when they don't work same shift he can ride a bike to work... It will be advantageous to us all... I wear out so much with total responsibility of the grand kids now... I can't do it alone...

    My son is off & running... Feels weird not to be jumping in the car to be going to the hospital early... I do know I need to slow a bit... My right leg... The one that crashed on me... Is swelling again... It did this before I lost the ability to use it & walk at my daughters in June... So... I have already exercised 5 times & massaged as many... It is screaming at me now... But pain in my leg is better then numbness any day...

    My best friend came over last night... she took one look at me & said... "Girl... It is finally hitting you... Where is the breakdown..." I don't know if I am trying to protect my son and grand children or even myself... I just can't let go of the emotion I feel... The tears welling up inside me... Every time I think of him I see him when I first walked in the room & he wasn't breathing.... Even today all I see is he is't breathing right... He isn't breathing totally on his own...

    They put him on a smaller breathing tube that forces air in his nose but his air levels are fluctuating between 85 and 92... They replace the C Pac Mask to bring it up to 98 and try again... It takes a while to hit 85 again... usually stabilizing around 90-92... The down again...

    Well... I have to eat yet & get ready in case it is my turn to run when he is done at the dr...

    I had a great dr appointment yesterday... My diabetic dr is very satisfied with my progress... I don't remember what it is called but my 3 month sugar average usually runs 10-11 & is suppose to be 6-7... Mine went from 11 to 7.7... She is greatly pleased...

    now we move on to biopsying the nodules o my thyroid... There are 3... she is needle biopsying the lgest one 1.8 mm... I will be having that done soon...

    Gotta run... Love you all... Thanks again for your prayers...

    Take care... Love... Jan/Dakota
    katmandulou responded:
    More hugs and prayers for you, Jan. I know "they" say that God doesn't give us more than we can handle, but it should come with a BIG bucket!
    missist replied to katmandulou's response:
    Amazed you are hanging in Jan.. I agree with KatmanduLou--that is a heckuva lot of stuff you have going on at once. God bless! I am praying for you daily.
    bette_kaffitz responded:

    I'll say it again. Take care of yourself. Right now, other people are caring for your son. When he comes home from the hospital, he will need you to be healthy and strong. Do whatever it takes to be in that condition so you can take over some of the care at that time.

    Last summer, it was my son who tried to kill himself. He drank a bunch of toilet bowel cleaner. He lost part of his esophagus and part of his duodeum, had the newer version of electroshock therapy, and seems to be doing well now. But, for him, this is a lifelong mental illness. I felt so helpless with him living 100 miles away in Rochester, NY. But, of course, it was not in my hands--any more than it is in your hands now.

    Care for your leg. Care for your thyroid. Get as strong as possible. Right now, your son is in God's hands and those of his medical team. But, sooner than you can imagine, you will be needed for some motherly TLC of your son. Be ready.


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