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    Leap of faith!!
    sparkyar posted:
    Wow another no sleep night for me, a series of wet weather had moved in to this area.. Making my bones ache... Well I am taking a leap of faith and quitting my job, I absolutely love being a CNA but after 20 years in this profession and the beating up on my body it takes.. ( not to mention all the crazy things I did to myself I my younger years) this body is tired... Sad for me that I am only 45, but after my rhrumey suggested it a few months ago.. And working crazy hours that has sent me into a horrible flare for a week now mommas giving in and slowing down.. Not to mention my first grandson will be born in February and I want to be that fun grandma not the grandma who is stuck in bed all the time... Please remember me in your prayers, I trying to file for disability too.. Hoping this is Gods will..
    missist responded:
    Hello Sparkyar-- I quit mine about 3 years ago.. closer to 4 now I guess. I haven't filed for disability--but I was a stay at home mom for a lot of years before going back to work--so I'm thinking I wouldn't be eligible for much. Dunno. I probably should consider it. I am not sure but I think you have to have been away from work for a bit before applying but I"m sure a lawyer can tell you how to do it.

    It is very nice to not have a job. Its not nice that folks seem disappointed at times--but I don't know what to say to them. I'm turning 55 soon, young to be retired--although I"m sure not the only one at this age. I do have an etsy shop and I sell things I make but it doesn't make much. I"m thninking of submitting some writing to the local paper and see if I can get a little work from them too.
    Currently I'm preparing help hubby with moving from the place he's been staying during the week and host Christmas so I decided to close up my etsy shop for the year. I sell wedding things so this is a slow time anyhow for me.

    I have to have a LOT of time to get things done cuz If I try to do it all in a day or two I'm knocked down for months--especially this time of year. I can't tell you how many Christmas holidays sent me into a downward spiral from stress and exhaustion. Last year was much better--and I think it is because I worked at not stressing and getting help. This year I am doing it and expect my daughter will come help me-- I have much less stress for quite a few reasons. I'm actually excited about the holidays for the first time in a long time.

    We do what we must in order to be the best we can be--at the things that matter most. Good for you taking that step-- it won't cure you but it will make life more doable.
    dollbug responded:
    Hello sparkyar. MiMi in NC. I wanted to tell you that being a grandmother will bring lots of love and joy to you. My 4th baby will soon be here. (due date Nov 24-I think) I have a little 9 year old GD and 7 and 4 year old GSs, They are the light of my life. I am so excited about meeting this little one. I am sure this baby will be just as special as the rest of them are.

    I also wanted to say that you can go on line and file for your disability. I did several years ago when I applied. I was denied and then I appealed the decision myself. I never used an attorney although the system indicated that I did and I was charged for this. I ended up and finally got the money back for the attorney's fees which was with held. All you have to do is to follow the instructions. Your doctor will provide most of the info verifying your medical issues. Don't be discouraged though. Keep on keeping on as this is a benefit for people who are unable to work any longer. Remember that you are getting *your money*.
    I think there use to be a 5 year *window* for people who decide to apply. (so you actually have 5 years to apply from the time you give up work) but most people need to apply as soon as possible and I think this is important as well.

    It is sad that getting approved is sometimes a real hassle to do. I guess the government just wants to hang on to our money as long as possible.

    Take care and good luck.


    ajnsmom responded:
    Hi, I just resigned my job in June because of fibro, type I diabetes, and complications from the diabetes. I applied for SSDI right away. I also applied online. It was denied the first time, so I requested a reconsideration, also online. I should receive an answer soon I think. I pray it is approved to take the financial pressure off. I'll pray for you that you are approved also.

    Linda S.
    missist replied to ajnsmom's response:
    Re: Quitting work and SSDI---I'll also be praying for both of you. I should think about this--as I will be at 5 yrs I suppose in no time. not sure where I would be at with my new dr. I've sure had a lot of med. bills.
    bette_kaffitz replied to dollbug's response:
    Sparkyar and MiMi,

    All the "experts" say you should bite the bullet and keep working, that most people don't get better when they SSDI. Well, that may be true, but we certainly don't get better if we keep abusing our bodies at work.

    Only you know how bad it gets. Your doc has probably never seen you at your worst. You know, the days when you just about manage to crawl to the bathroom and back. The days you spend crying. The days you dread.

    The next time one of those days comes, crawl to the phone, call your doctor, speak to the receptionist you have befriended, and get yourself to the office that day. Brush your teeth, comb your hair, wear sweatpants, forego the makeup. In otherwords, let your doctor see just how much this disease has invaded your life.

    A caring, consciencious doc will up your meds that day. If that does not make it possible for you to work--it did for me for several precious years, making a major difference in our income now--then your doctor will be firmly in your corner for any hassles with the SS Administration.

    Hope this helps you both.

    dollbug replied to bette_kaffitz's response:
    Bette...I think that until the *experts* actually walk in our shoes, they have no idea whatsoever just how much this illness can affect anyone's life. I don't even understand why anyone would even think that we *like* getting approved for what little bit of money we get in SSD. The majority of us would rather have a job and a career than face the wrath of the dragon each and every day. I know I certainly would. I personally feel like we, FMers, are put under a lot of *stress* when we are denied and have to deal with yet another stage of our life, when we have enough to worry about as it is. I know that I could NOT live on what I get and I worked for the majority of my life since I was 14 years old.

    Life is tough enough without having to worry about how we now can manage to live. I do NOT know one person who can *live on nothing*. Regardless of what people think, a person has to have some sort of *income* to survive. Unless you are a person who has been *blessed* with having *rich* parents who have left you well off anyway, it takes money to do anything these days.

    But it seems like there are people who do not quite understand this. Getting approved for SSD is just another *process* that we have to face and wade through. It, too, is a trial and error process and we have to keep on keeping on until we prove to someone, who knows absolutely nothing about what we face each and every day, that we are no longer able to hold down a job.

    FM is one of those illnesses which is almost *invisible* to those who do not deal with it every day. Just because most of us do NOT look sick, it does not mean that we are NOT SICK. I guess this is why most people do not have a clue unless they walk a day in our paths to know.

    I guess life was never meant to be easy for a lot of us.

    Take care.


    bette_kaffitz replied to dollbug's response:

    Please forgive me if I downplayed the havoc that the whole idea of SSD brings into our lives. If I hadn't finally been approved--just days before the 2 year anniversary of my last work day--we would have lost the farm.

    SSD is about 1/4 of what my salary was. If I had been able to work the extra years, we would have been much more secure in our old age. At 70, that is a very scary thought.

    I had to get records from my primary care doctor, my pain doctor (who had moved but sent the records and a very nice personal letter to me), my rheumy, and my neurologist. My lawyer had a 98% success rate. I was on the fentanyl patch at 150 mcg/hr. (Starting rate is 12 mcg/hr.) And it still went all the way to a judicial appeal.

    The hastle of having to deal with all this paperwork, going from doctor to doctor, worrying about our money situation did not help my fibro one little bit. I zoomed from 146 to 192 pounds during those two years. (Most of it came off after I got my first check.)

    The way we treat sick people as if they are liars, cheats, and no-goods who just want a free pass is barbaric. Something has to change.

    Again, if I said anything that even hinted that applying for SSD was a minor thing, I am sorry.


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