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    Where did my friends go?
    charh61 posted:
    I was only diagnosed a few months ago. Took over a year. I cannot work and can barely keep my house clean. By the way I was one of those super-Moms. Worked full time, cleaned my own house, did all the cooking and laundry. Raised 2 children, and am helping with the care of my grandchildren. What a let down to what I can do now.
    I used to have many friends from all places in my life, school, work, kids school, hubby,etc. Suddenly they have disappeared! Has this happened to anyone else or do my friends just stink!?
    dollbug responded:
    Hello charh and welcome. MiMi in NC. Yes, I think a lot of us understand exactly what you are going through and how you feel. I also think people just do NOT understand the illness. Perhaps they do not want to either.

    I think people go through *phases* in life anyway. I guess this is just part of what happens to a lot of people. We seem to lose contact with some, make friends with others and do what we can to help ourselves manage what we have to do each day. It is hard at times....but we, FMers must keep on keeping on. I know that over time I think I have sort of gotten use to this. So I am sure things will also get better for you too.

    I also try to help my children with their children. I have been trying to pick up some things for my grandchildren so when school starts I will already have things that they need. I have 2 in school now and 1 another one goes to pre-school and I take care of my youngest GS while his mommy works part time. He will be turning 1 in Nov. He is the *light of my life* right now. So happy and sweet.

    I hope things get better for you soon.

    Take care.


    msmary15 responded:
    Boy you sound like me twin. My friends and children lead an active life so I can't fully be a part of it. I enjoy time with them as I can tolerate. Baby shower this weekend. I'll rest all morning and bring a pillow for my back. Had to tell my live in friend no beach this Sat would be to fatigued. When I have a before, regular day, shopping walking the mall out to eat, I spend the rest of the afternoon and nt in bed. Have to learn to pace myself and so glad I don't have a job. I go to a gym and use the warm water pool. I complain to all my new friends(seniors). I apologized to one 87 yr old man and he said, "It's ok I really don't listen and I'm deaf. We both laughed.
    fibroornot responded:
    Ohhhhhh Yessss! I was first diagnosed in 2001 after a sever virus left me with extremely difficult 2014 I use a walker full time.....I have been seeing a neurologist since novemberr 2012 and have been followed for possible MS....
    they just don't know what to do with me these you have a rheumatologist......I may be referred to one 2006 I was diagnosed with orbital sarcoidosis and was on meds from a rheumatologist for about 5 years....but I am cleared of that now.....I am going to be 59 in you was a supermom...super medical office manager...loved and taught hard core aerobics in the '80's then dancercise in the '90's and then aqua ....making to the mall and particicpating slowly in the pool are my only activities...thankgoodness I am an avid reader as that requires just sitting ! keep in touch!
    booch007 responded:
    Good morning,

    I didn't read above this, just your post.

    I think what happens as you are getting diagnosed, it is in the forefront. You think about it all the time, you talk about it all the time. You feel lousy and (you are lousy).

    Friends are funny, some can't figure out what to say to make you better so they hide away, distance themselves. Other as for me, I just kept saying I can't I can't do they (or I) drifted away.

    I am a nurse and I have nurses for friends so I was lucky with the tolerance they held, but I still have distance with them, set by me. I can't walk a mall to shop and have lunch. I can't do alot of thing but i HOLD me back. fear of my legs not working in the middle of what we are doing.

    I am sorry this happens to people, I bet they are still there....just behind a screen. If you give us the complaints and issues and voice your anger to this situation here...maybe then it will be more fun with you there with them.

    I absolutely changed everything in my life and needed to downsize my outside things. To live small works for me. I was a powerhouse too. 3 jobs (ICU, Hospice and office) kids, house and business, but I got hurt and everything chnaged.

    I love my friends and they know.I am just quiet and a home body more now.

    Phone calls and laughter is still good medicine. Don't be hard on your friends as they don't understand all this. We do. Then again there are times here none of us understand the new pain we have or lack of function that has showed up. It is a mess for sure.

    Good luck, keep it here. This page is open 24/7 and free....what is better than that!!

    Nancy B

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