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DD ate food from friend in cafeteria
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seeit2 posted:
Honestly, do you even wonder how the hell you are going to keep your child alive long enough to finish school? Today Lily told me her friend "April" was so nice she even shared her fruit snacks with Lily and another friend during lunch today. Wasn't that so nice? Luckily fruit snacks are generally safe for her but Lily just said "April said they had no milk in them! And they did not hurt me!" I stopped breathing myself when she told me that, and gave her a stern warning about taking food from other kids. I reminded her that April cannot read and had no idea what was in the food. And I emailed her teacher and asked her to remind the kids not to share food. I can't do anything else, and neither can she, really. THis is my worst nightmare and I know there's not much I can do except nag my girl and pray she does the right thing...but obviously I'm not getting through very well yet. I'm totally freaking out.

And doesn't that seem like a whole lot of responsibility for a 5-year old, to turn down candy from a friend because it may hurt her? How do I raise her to be safe without making her terrified of food and the people who offer it? ....maybe I should just homeschool. This is just so freaking hard...
Deb (40) DD (4) Funny, spirited, curious, has a severe milk allergy, DS (1) fearless and bottomless, peanut allergy
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mrswhitecastle responded:
I'm so glad that Lily is OK.

It also makes it scary because they can reason that it was OK last time when they shared food, so it will be OK next time. You are getting through, though. Look at how well she does most of the time. It's not fair that at this young age, they have to be so responsible ALL the time for such a serious issue.

It's hard to find that line between safe and paranoid. I'm pretty sure that we have crossed over to the paranoid side, so I don't have any good advice. Just lots of empathy.

We are counting down the days until school is out. 13 days to go....
Emily (7 - allergic to tree nuts) Elizabeth (5)
 
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seeit2 replied to mrswhitecastle's response:
Thanks, MrsW. I can't believe I cried myself to sleep the other night because my kid ate a fruit snack, but such is life I guess.
Deb (40) DD (4) Funny, spirited, curious, has a severe milk allergy, DS (1) fearless and bottomless, peanut allergy
 
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mrswhitecastle replied to seeit2's response:
I'm sorry you were/are so upset. I wish there was something I could say to help you feel better.

That's why it's so nice to be able to post here, though. We can post without feeling like we have to defend our feelings or reasonings.

I'm curious to see if Haylen will delete the post on the other board. Do you still want it deleted, or are you OK with it there?
Emily (7 - allergic to tree nuts) Elizabeth (5)
 
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seeit2 replied to mrswhitecastle's response:
That whole thing just really irritates me, maybe I'm being irrational but if I posted it and I want it gone then why shouldn't it just be deleted? Now it seems like its so late there's no point, but what I posted was emotional and for me very personal and I didn't like having it sit out there for everyone who may not offer the support I'm seeking to read...does that make sense? I didn't want platitudes, I wanted "yeah, it DOES totally suck, that WAS scary, this IS hard" - like I get here. And I understand that if you don't live it you can't really relate and it's extremely nice that they tried - but that's why I come here. I just screwed up because I was upset. I don't want to have to explain myself about it.
Deb (40) DD (4) Funny, spirited, curious, has a severe milk allergy, DS (1) fearless and bottomless, peanut allergy
 
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mrswhitecastle replied to seeit2's response:
I totally get it. That's why I responded here, and not over there.

When you post about allergies over there, there is always the fear that you are opening yourself up for ridicule. You never know how they will react.

It's nice that they try, but it's just not the same. Like, when they give suggestions on things to do, it's almost insulting, like -- Your really think I haven't tried that before???? When, here, if the same suggestion was made, I would appreciate it. I think I just may be a board snob.....

If you ask for a post to be deleted, I think it should be deleted. If there was a question about it, they could have contacted you to verify that you still wanted it to be deleted.
Emily (7 - allergic to tree nuts) Elizabeth (5)


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