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Seriously, am I out of line?
seeit2 posted:
Lily's teacher sent me a email saying she is putting together the Valentine's day party for the class and is there any ice cream Lily can eat? I wrote back and said Really? Ice cream? can't I just make the class some heart-shaped cookies please? My DH says I was harsh and at least the teacher is staying in touch with me.

At least she is, yeah. But WHY would you even consider ice cream? In February? In a classroom with a KNOWN and SEVERE milk allergy? WHy would you?! Is it just me? Does it HAVE to be ice cream for Pete's sake??! I am just incredulous to be honest, I don't think the teacher takes this thing very seriously and I would like to punch her in the face. There. I said it. She can kiss my ass. None of those kids needs ice cream at school.
Deb (40) DD (4) Funny, spirited, curious, has a severe milk allergy, DS (1) fearless and bottomless, peanut allergy
deluxehd responded:
No, I don't think you are out of line. You would think with a little common sense she would know that ice cream is made with milk! But like your husband said, at least she contacted you. It is very tough in this world with food allergies and people just don't get it. I hope you wre able to work things out to keep your daughter safe.
Adult with food allergies and asthma.
seeit2 replied to deluxehd's response:
I have calmed down since yesterday lol...she does try, yes, just not very hard. DD's last teacher really spoiled me. DH suggested that she might be afraid to always ask me to bake for the class so I will try to talk to her. I just feel sometimes like people purposely make things harder than they have to be, kwim?
Deb (40) DD (4) Funny, spirited, curious, has a severe milk allergy, DS (1) fearless and bottomless, peanut allergy
mrswhitecastle responded:
Nope, you were not out of line. Now if your reply email had been:

Dear Ms. @#$%% idiot,

What the @#$%^ are you thinking? Are you a moron? No ice cream!

Then, MAYBE, I could say you were out of line. It would just depend on what sort of mood I was in at the time.

I'll let you in on a secret. Emily isn't going to her party on Valentine's day. It just isn't worth it. I've tried to work with these people, and it just doesn't work. Her party is in the morning. So, she is going to stay up late the night before, sleep late that morning, we are going to go do something fun, and then I will drop her off at school after lunch. The school had better not give me any grief, or else I may have to post an "Am I out of line" topic.
Emily (7 - allergic to tree nuts) Elizabeth (5)
seeit2 replied to mrswhitecastle's response:
That sounds super fun! I bet Emily will love that!

I sent her an email that might be an apology, I don't know...I said I was sorry if I was curt but it seemed kinda mean to make my kid sit and watch 22 of her friends eat ice cream when she can't have any. So maybe we could agree to find something else to eat. She has STILL not responded to anything so I guess she's mad, I don't know. I don't really care. But I'll let you know what kind of cookies I end up making lol.
Deb (40) DD (4) Funny, spirited, curious, has a severe milk allergy, DS (1) fearless and bottomless, peanut allergy
seeit2 replied to mrswhitecastle's response:
You know, you and Em will have fun together but it sucks that you can't work it out so she can be there.
Deb (40) DD (4) Funny, spirited, curious, has a severe milk allergy, DS (1) fearless and bottomless, peanut allergy
seeit2 replied to seeit2's response:
That didn't sound right...I mean it sucks that the school can't be more accommodating and work with you.

I got an email from DD's teacher after a little more back and forth and she basically said "I'll let you know what I decide". I'd like to kick her. If she decides wrong then I might actually declare war. It seriously bums me out to think that I might have to pull DD from the party. Apparently her teacher asked LILY if she had a safe alternative, and Lily said yes...but did not mention that she never eats the stuff because she does not like it. So her teacher figured she'd just plug something else in and everything would be peachy. But it is SO unsafe for DD, and like I said it's just mean...I'm so mad. It's taken me two days to calm down enough to write this. ANd it's not settled yet...
Deb (40) DD (4) Funny, spirited, curious, has a severe milk allergy, DS (1) fearless and bottomless, peanut allergy
mrswhitecastle replied to seeit2's response:
So her teacher still may serve ice cream???!!!! I must not be understanding you correctly, because that just seems too idiotic to have the teacher still considering doing the ice cream.....

I think the thing that irritates me the most is that the school won't follow their own policies. They have policies in place, but don't follow them. For example, parents are not supposed to bring in Birthday treats anymore. Well, parents still do. (It's not nearly as often, but it still happens.) What is wrong with just saying, here is our rule, follow it?! The rules are in place for a reason.

I'm so tired of fighting and getting nothing accomplished. Emily is excluded from a lot. I guess I've resigned myself to the fact that is the way the world is, and she's going to have to accept it. I've transitioned from trying to make everything safe, to helping Emily live with what it is, and make the best of it. Sometimes it breaks my heart, but I don't know what else I can do.
Emily (7 - allergic to tree nuts) Elizabeth (5)
crunk05177 responded:
I am just reading through all of this now and I am so upset for you. How can her teacher be so ignorant?! IF she decides to still serve icecream, I HOPE you raise hell. I HOPE you complain to the principal and to whoever else you can. Situations like this break my heart. I know that this sounds childish and mean but when you come across people like this, do you ever secretly wish severe allergies on them or their families? I never told anyone that before. Allergies are horrible and in reality, I really don't wish for anyone to have them but there are times when I wish these people would have it happen to them even if only for a day or a week or something that way they can understand and stop being so ignorant! It makes me so angry!
seeit2 replied to crunk05177's response:
There is a story of a Time magazine reported who railed against kids and families with allergies, calling them names and claiming they made it up...a year later his child was diagnosed with a severe peanut allergy. Let me tell you, people were giddy with joy over it. I'll try to find the link to the story - it's a good one. he actually apologizes for the whole thing.

I still have not heard from this woman, I don't know if she is avoiding me or thinks she is leaving me twisting.
Deb (40) DD (4) Funny, spirited, curious, has a severe milk allergy, DS (1) fearless and bottomless, peanut allergy

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