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Guilt is Overwhelming
An_256647 posted:
My mother died last November at almost 91. The last two months she was in a nursing home. She was still fighting to live and strong until the last six weeks after she found out the doctor ordered Hospice and she would not be going home. Then, it was like she gave up and was unable to do anything for herself. She always told me she would rather be dead than be in a nursing home, but I felt I couldn't handle her by myself anymore and they would be able to provide for all her needs on a daily basis. I feel so guilty over the things I did but shouldn't have and all the things I didn't do and should have. The hospice team didn't even give me a heads up when she was a day or two away from dying. I know in life there are no "do-overs", but I feel she would have lived several months longer if I had moved her home with round-the-clock nursing care. She had some dementia which I didn't full realize at the time she was at home; I thought she was just "pulling my chain." I really feel like I wasn't there for her at her most vulnerable moments. The guilt is so overwhelming. I just don't care about anything anymore. It's really a struggle to maintain friendships and they are so tiring. I need some help but I don't know where to turn.

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