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    living in secrecy and silence
    livelaughmoe posted:
    Is anyone else living in silence to the rest of the world...
    I continue to think about the pros and cons of family and friends knowing exactly whats going on with me. They have to wonder why I am isolating, taking time off from work, declining wine, crying, skipping baby showers and weddings. I feel like I am living this lie, and I don't know how to share it with anyone. I count on my husband to lean on, and visa versa. I just feel like I want to scream out to the world what is going on in my body, but i'm just too scared to tell anyone. What if.....(insert every bad scenario)...While people are blogging about there families, I read them in tears.

    Thank you for listening to me, and allowing me to break some silence.

    I would like to share this video with you.
    David K Walmer, MD, PhD responded:
    You are suffering from a common condition that thousands of women/couples suffer from every day. As you may have already discovered, it is true that people who aren't going through fertility issues aren't always the best people to confide in. They frequently don't know what to say or say things that are hurtful unintentionally. The good news is that what you are experiencing is normal and there are ways to improve your quality of life. There are many support groups out there and psychologists who are trained to help women/couples through this challenging time. Find people in the same situation and bond. Also if possible, don't stop living the rest of your life. Continue to do things that you enjoy, including drinking a glass of wine if you want to. That is one of the upsides of not being pregnant. Baby yourself a bit. Get a massage, get some exercise (endorphins are free & uplifting), take a mission trip to Haiti. The more you focus on what makes you sad the harder it is. Get some professional help in your fertility quest and try to break the barrier of silence in safe ways. Best wishes!

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    For more information, visit the Duke Fertility Center