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Exhausted
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BaseballWife79 posted:
We have been TTC since 2008, had a miscarriage Oct 2008, found out I have PCOS, then began fertility treatments in 2010 (3 cycles Clomid, 4 cycles Menopur). The Dr had additional test done on my husband where we found out that less than 1% of his swimmers are agressive at fertilizing the egg. Our last fertility treatment was July 2011. Although the Dr had 2 additional cycles of Menopur approved for us they advised that IVF was our best bet due to both of our situations. We have been trying on our own since then. I needed a break from the appointments, medicine and emotional roller coaster. Although he is very supportive, my husband doesn't seem to quite understand the emotional side and doesn't have the longing/need of being a parent that I feel (his words). Sometimes I just wanna give up, he doesn't get it. I get so angry that people who shouldn't have children do (and some have multiple), he doesn't get it. It is infuriating that people who didn't even want children have them, he doesn't get it. He asks me when others get pregnant why I can't simply be happy for them - I tried to explain that I am happy, but I'm also sad that we don't have the same. I know I shouldn't think that way - but cannot seem to pull myself up. I just want to crawl in a hole and shut everyone out. Majority of the time, I feel like my husband might be better off with another wife so he could have a better chance of having a child and wouldn't have to deal with my emotions. I cannot imagine my life not being a mother.
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mrs62610 responded:
I'm very sorry to hear you and your DH are struggling. My best advice would be to seek some counceling as it may help you deal with the emotional side and help your DH to understand how you are feeling.
Me-25 DH-38 TTC 21 months. 3 rounds of Clomid, 5 rounds of Femara and 3 IUI's, all BFN's. Doing IVF. Egg Retrieval on 1/25, 1 Perfect 8 cell Embryo Transferred on 1/28! 1st Beta Feb. 11th!!
 
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booklvr04 replied to mrs62610's response:
(((HUGS)))

Please just know that you are not alone, that your feelings are perfectly normal and okay. Going through treatment is both physically and emotionally taxing on your body. Your homones are all over the place, and as women we are emotionally tied to the physicalities of wanting to be pregnant, to go through labor and delivery, and to be a mom. I think it is hard for men to understand the emotional aspect, or maybe it's difficult for them to show their emotions. I definitely think that talking with someone is the way to go, and hopefully your husband will be on board for that too! Check with your clinic and see if they have counselors your can speak with!! Take Care!


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