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    Premature Ovarian Failur
    anowlin posted:
    When I was 35, I stopped having my periods and no one knew why and I didn't push for an answer. Why? I don't know. Then at 45, atypical endromtrial cells were found and I needed a hysterectomy. I lived in another town, then and my gyne's FIRST words: I can't believe that no one told you that one premature ovarian failure is common in women with SLE..

    My other friends who don't have children (they're few) have made the choice NOT to have children. There are enough losses with lupus, that this is one more GIGANTIC loss and one that I had no choice in. I'm holding back the tears as I write this. I suppose I could rationalize the choice that was made for me by "you could barely run after the kids or play with an active 2 year old; but let that be MY decision, My husband, bless his soul and I were robbed, and lupus was the thief.
    leecat41 responded:
    I am so sorry to hear that. I know that words are no comfort but please know that my heart goes out to you.
    To do what is right is not always easy, to do what is easy is not always right.
    anowlin replied to leecat41's response:
    leecat41 Thanks so much for thinking of me. Not a day goes by that that hole in my heart doesn't feel salt, but hearing your words makes me feel not so alone! thank you
    shannielee74 responded:
    Your header of Ovarian Failure caught my eye. I am dealing with ongoing ovarian cysts and endometriosis. Since birth control pills are not recommended and I have family members who have had severe (near fatal) reactions to provera I am not sure what to do. I am thinking (at age 37) that it is time to just have it all yanked.

    I do feel that you were robbed and those around you should be more sensitive to your plight.
    ~~~Life is what happens when your busy making other plans...John Lennon~~~
    anowlin replied to shannielee74's response:
    That is the hard part; your deep understanding and my own family's seeming insensitivity. Then again, it is so possible that they're so busy with their children and their lives...No,, I tried that excuse for too many years.

    I ask about THEIR lives, lives without children, show interest in their work, what makes them tick, and at the end of the day, I don't sense any thought that I might have feelings that are worth honoring. Thanks so much for ackowledging.

    Years ago when I had to have a hysterectomy, I confided my sadness in my boss (I'm a nurse). I've NEVER forgotten (nor doubt I will) her response, "it's a diseased organ.I It's got to go." Seemed so cold and still does, though I did have the surgery.
    deewalt2911 replied to anowlin's response:
    I was touched by your post and wanted to let you know how sorry I am to hear this. I had the same issues with my ovaries and endometrial cancer led to a hysterectomy in 2007. Yes, I too wished that they had told me more. I was undiagnosed at the time but it is all making sense now. There is so much that we do not know about lupus. I too have been feeling very cheated by this disease. Try writing a letter to lupus venting your feelings. I did it and it worked wonders for me.
    anowlin replied to deewalt2911's response:
    " Try writing a letter to lupus venting your feelings. " You mean the Lupus Foundation of America? I never thought of that. I should also write that same gyne WHO TOLD ME NOTHNG about WHY that might have been happening, but was more than happy to do the surgery.

    But, then again, he is a 'he' and the MD who told me about the connection is a 'she.' Actually, the gyne who told me of the connection had a hard time hiding her disappointment; and it's not because she's not a surgeon. She's a gyne surgeon JUST LIKE HIM. I thank you and have my projects lined up for the next few days!

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