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MEAN doctor!!!
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gardenms24 posted:
My first dear MS doctor died several years ago and I didn't feel the need to find another one until the oral meds came out. The new neurologist was said to be one of the "best" in treating MS. First visit went ok but he definitely was not "warm and fuzzy", something I've learned not to expect from many neurologists (my dear deceased dr. being the exception). My follow up visit the next month was a disaster. He did not show me the results of my MRI and when I ask him why he had ordered a CAT scan of my chest he acted insulted that I had questioned him about it. He finally told me he was trying to rule out a lung condition that mimics MS. He put me on Aubagio. When I asked if this would help relieve the debilitating fatigue I was experiencing he said that it would only slow the progression of the my MS. Fatigue is my main problem, the other symptoms I experience come and go and I have learned to live with them. He ordered Vyvase for me, but my insurance wouldn't pay for it unless ADD was added to my diagnosis. I have had ADD since I was in school and I am 63 now. I ask him to do this, and he accused me of wanting him to commit fraud. He said that I didn't have ADD but was bipolar and I needed to see a psychiatrist. I told I had already seen several and had been diagnosed as bipolar and with ADD. I was feeling so frustrated that I started to cry. He stood up, came over to me, leaned down and shouted, "STOP IT! STOP IT! STOP IT! STOP IT!" I was so shocked I almost started laughing because I thought he was joking. He wasn't. The rest of the visit was spent with his back to me writing in my folder. I was determined to salvage the visit and try to learn something useful from him as I had driven over 90 miles to his office. He told me I was manic at that moment. I know when I am manic, and if I was anything at the time, it was depressed. I had never been talked to like that by a doctor. He acted like I was a criminal for being bipolar. He ordered Clorazapem to help me sleep. He said it would "turn my brain off ". I don't want my brain turned off. I just want to relax enough to sleep. He is convinced that is why I am fatigued...my sleep habits aren't what he thinks they should be. I have always been a night owl and love to stay up late. I also sleep late, but I get at least 8 hrs. of sleep every 24 hours. Anyway, I felt he didn't like me and didn't feel he could help me so he blamed everything on the chemical imbalance in my brain. I knew this already, but had never been made to feel so bad about it. He told the receptionist to schedule me another appointment in 4 months. Needless to say, I will cancel it. Even if a doctor can't help you, they shouldn't make you feel like it is your fault. I honestly think this doctor has something against bipolar patients. To end the appointment he told me I wasn't going blind, I wasn't cripple, so to quit worrying about my MS. I don't worry about it, most of the time. Fatigue is the only really bad symptom I have and he refused to give me any help for it, even though that is the main reason I went to see him. I know it isn't required that a doctor "like" all his patients, but this doctor was unprofessional, insulting, rude and just plain mean. I cried almost all the way home until I realized I was letting his bullying upset me. I refuse to do that any longer, but it still feels good to vent about his conduct. I hope no one else has to experience anything similar from this or any other doctor. A visit to the doctor should make us feel better and give us hope, not make us feel worse and hopeless.

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libra33 responded:
understand EXACTLY how you feel:( im bipolar and have adhd as well and it has been so frustrating for me to deal with my neurologist. im going to finally get a second opinion and dr because my current one is a complete a*#. i was diagnosed with demeyelinating disease one year ago to the month come to think of it, and ive gone nowhere but down since.
he dismisses everything i tell him and pushes me out the door within ten minutes at the most. he says my mri's are the same, my reflexes are fine at the moment and that all is well ta freakin ta!!! he makes me feel as if i am nothing but a waste of his time. i suffer for days after and am finally taking a stand. when i asked him to refer me to someone else he said flat out no. so i told him (yesterday my latest appointment) that i will just have one of my other dr.'s do it because she is eager to have me seen. my other dr. thought it best to give him the chance to refer me out, a polite gesture i thought, but heck no he wanted nothing to do with that! he was insulted at the idea of it and was once again quick to rush me out.
this is my first time "venting" or admitting anything online so im a bit bottled up,sorry.just try to keep moving forward and know that you are not your disease, the disease is just an illness your body has, it doesnt define you. ive been telling you that and trying to believe it for myself as well. i guess its harder for us to give ourselves a break than it is to see another hurting and assure them that they need to as well.
im babbling,sorry. i urge you to go to another one and another one until you find the one who fits you. im going to have my doc refer me to another one as well. it sucks because we open up and expose our fears to them and they have complete power to do what they want with it. they may try to control the appointment but they cannot control how we feel and react. we can choose to dismiss their entire being if we really want to. we are special and we are strong. anybody with this disease knows that. ive never spoken to anybody else who understood and I'm in tears right now just talking/typing to you. i wish i could give you a giant hug and take all of this pain and frustration away from you, but i cant. i can however be here. we all go through this differently and we all have our limitations, you haven't even come close to reaching yours. stay strong and keep us posted on anything you feel like sharing and thank you for your post. it got me to finally step out of the darkness and loneliness and finally feel some hope and a closeness that i honestly havent felt in a very very long time. ive seen myself as an outsider who acts brave on the outside yet terrified on the inside and on occasion really angry at people "trying" to help when they just dont UNDERSTAND. at 33 my body feels worse than many of my friends, who are all seniors by the way, i have more in common with them than anyone else, that is, before i met you all <3 .good luck and god bless


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