Baby's First Year Community

I'm definitely prone to panic at every little thing. He is my first little one . I'm also bad about not letting him cry it out. I've been accused of spoiling him but, he's only 3 1/2 months old. At what age are you supposed to let them cry it out?

im guilty od all its scary

I panic over every little thing and neglect my relationship. As a new mom i want to make sure i dont do anything to possibly damage my child either mentally or physically. Ive been going a great job so far but its so stressful. So im trying my best to just relax and let her explore, but in a safe environment.

I think he's a bit too young to CIO, my ped told us 5 moths would be appropriate. However when we were sleep training DD it was so hard on me to have her crying, i know she was in a safe place, but to hear her cry like that really tore my heart. We stopped because it was just too traumatic for me. Do what ur comfortable with though.

I don't know that there's a magic age to let a LO CIO. I'm not even sure I'd put that in a list of parent mistakes. There is such conflicting information/studies about CIO - so I say do what feels right. Your body was designed to respond to your baby and as time goes on you'll be able to discern immediate need cries from not-so-important cries.

I wouldn't let a 3 1/2 month old cry it out either. I don't really believe in letting a baby cry for more than 5 minutes. My daughter is a great baby, so it's possible that my opinion will change with the next one, but she is 7 months old and I rarely let her cry for any amount of time. She just works herself up to a fit where she is basically hyperventilating if I let her cry, and that just seems incredibly cruel to me. She is my precious baby, and I want to make her feel safe and secure. I wouldn't listen to anyone who says your little one is spoiled. You are just a good momma! My daughter sleeps great (Except when she is teething!), so it's totally possible to sleep train your children without letting them cry it out. That's just my opinion. Oh, and I am totally the one who panics over every little thing. I keep saying that motherhood is going to make me go gray early.

For me the closest one would be ignoring my marriage, though it's not ignored. We don't have any sort of date night because DS is the ultimate mama's boy. We never did get him to take the bottle. Now he's on solids so he could go without breastmilk, but he is very reluctant to let anyone other than me feed him and he is in full separation anxiety mode so leaving the room is traumatic for him. I just wouldn't want to inflict his mood on anyone else because he's generally pretty good around me. Of course there are quite a few times where being held by mama is the only thing that calms him down. We also have the double whammy of molars coming in and him starting to walk at 10 months so he's a bit of a rough patch.

I would love to have periodic date nights, but it'd be too tough on him right now. Plus it would be hard to enjoy myself knowing he's probably crying it up big time.

With 5 LO's I have probably done every mistake on the list. Someday's I'm not sure how my first survived. Looking at the list today I would say ignoring my relationship would be what I am guilty of right now. I really do try but with 5 kids, working full time and take care of the house there just isn't anything left at the end of the day. During the summer months I also can most of the veggies, jams/jellies, pickles, BBQ sauce, tomatoes and spaghetti sauce that we will use for the year. In the winter I bake most of the bake goods that we use for the year (cookies, muffins etc.)

My SO told me yesterday now that school is starting he wants me to cook breakfast in the mornings. He doesn't want the kids eating cereal before school. I promptly told him he could get up in the morning to fix breakfast because I can't do anything else.

With the kids older I know I am busier now then when they were babies. I do know that the kids will leave the house one day and I still want my SO around but I want to do as much with the kids as I can for as long as I can. We do try to do a date night or something once a month. Lately it has been every other month. This is all I can do for now. Going to the store with just the 2 of us is a treat. We do go to lunch about once a week together. It isn't much time but we can actually talk without interuptions. With school starting back up again we will take a few days off of work and just do something for us.

I agree with the other posters on here about CIO---I don't really think it's appropriate at any age. Of course if they are just in thier crib whining because they can't sleep, that's one thing, but a true cry ---and we know what that is---I know he is not going to recover from that on his own. He'll just get louder and more upset until he starts gagging himself. I refuse to allow my son to cry like that--if he was an adult, and I heard him crying like that, I would be going in to see what was wrong. Why leave a little baby alone? Of anyone, they need that comfort most. Nothing wrong with that, it is completely natural for moms to comfort their babies. Doesn't mean we are spoiling them.

I'm glad there are other people who feel that way. I don't think I'm ever going to be able to let him cry it out. When I think about doing it, I feel like all it would do is teach him he can't count on me.

Good for you for saying additional breakfast duties were not an option. If your so pushes it, offer to cook breakfast in exchange for getting all the kids up, dressed, and ready. (Which I'm sure you do solo). My guess is cereal will suddenly be just fine.

GL!

can I vote Panicking even though we dont have a kid yet?

Every day I think "OMG what if we need THIS?" or "what are we going to do if we get a kid that does THAT?" AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

"Good for you for saying additional breakfast duties were not an option. If your so pushes it, offer to cook breakfast in exchange for getting all the kids up, dressed, and ready. (Which I'm sure you do solo). My guess is cereal will suddenly be just fine."

LIKE!!

Not letting your child CIO is NOT a parenting mistake at all.