Find Information About:

Drugs & Supplements

Get information and reviews on prescription drugs, over-the-counter medications, vitamins, and supplements. Search by name or medical condition.

Pill Identifier

Pill Identifier

Having trouble identifying your pills?

Enter the shape, color, or imprint of your prescription or OTC drug. Our pill identification tool will display pictures that you can compare to your pill.

Get Started

My Medicine

Save your medicine, check interactions, sign up for FDA alerts, create family profiles and more.

Get Started

WebMD Health Experts and Community

Talk to health experts and other people like you in WebMD's Communities. It's a safe forum where you can create or participate in support groups and discussions about health topics that interest you.

  • Second Opinion

    Second Opinion

    Read expert perspectives on popular health topics.

  • Community


    Connect with people like you, and get expert guidance on living a healthy life.

Got a health question? Get answers provided by leading organizations, doctors, and experts.

Get Answers

Sign up to receive WebMD's award-winning content delivered to your inbox.

Sign Up


All communities will be placed in read-only mode (you will be able to see and search for posts but not start or reply to discussions) as we conduct maintenance. We will make another announcement when posting is re-opened. Thank you for your continued support and patience, and if you have any further questions, please email

Yours in health,
WebMD Community Management

Wife refuses to speak same language as husband to daughter
NitroBiz posted:
This is probably not the right forum to discuss this, but I know there are a few great minds with a lot of experience in here and I wanted to get your input whether this is good or bad and if I'm just way off base. [br>[br>My wife is Brazilian and I'm from the states. We have a 2 year old daughter who will be 3 in March, who was born in the US. I don't speak Portuguese all that well and my wife speaks perfect English . My daughter was born in Seattle and after her 1st birthday we hade a huge decision to move to my wife's native country of Brazil. Last year my wife decided without discussion with me to only speak Portuguese with our daughter. As a result of this I have been unable to communicate with my daughter 98% of the time and it's getting to be very frustrating and disheartening. I feel like I am missing some of the best moments with my daughter. My daughter gets exposed to Portuguese from her Mom, Grandmother, Aunt, fellow students and teachers at her school and I only get to see her a few hours out of the day and weekends with the exception of this past month since she has been on school vacation. I've tried talking to my wife about this and approached her from several different angles but she refuses to compromise. This is a growing problem for me and it infuriates me every-time I hear my wife speaking to my daughter in Portuguese that I don't understand. [br>[br>Now I know there are a lot of families where the mother and father speak separate languages to their children but in my experience it's when the children are at a more advanced age and it's after the child knows both languages. In my case my daughter and I can't communicate. I read to her, making sure most of her TV and books are in English but it's just not enough. I think she can kinda understand me and vice-versa but there is a lot missing. The most important person in her life is her Mom (I understand that) and she is naturally going to want too follow her. So I'm left out and my feelings of being isolated grow stronger everyday. [br>[br>I realize that I'm in Brazil and 99% of the citizens don't speak English and I'm supposed to do what Romans do but until I am completely fluent in Portuguese (which might be a while or never) I need for all of us to be speaking the same language for family unity, especially at this fragile time in my daughters life and my ability to adapt to my new surroundings. So I ask, am I wrong to want my wife to speak English to our daughter (at least when I'm around) or until she can speak both languages better?
jazka responded:
Signed up just to reply,
Our 2.5 old daughter is bi-lingual (Finnish, Russian) as well and I see your situation.

We both go to work and she's with the nanny (who speaks Russian) 8-10 hours a day, so of course she knows more Russian at the moment.
But I don't think it's a negative thing, it takes time to learn two languages instead of one. She switches languages easily, we all laugh when she sometimes speaks her mixed-language.

I'd say go for it, keep on talking English to your daughter and let her learn it, even if it takes time. Most definitely let your wife to talk Portugese since it's her native language (even if she'd speak English fluently.. first language is always first language). Maybe you could take up some lessons as well to catch up their conversation?

Your daugher will soon speak both languages fluently and it will be a great benefit in her life!

Helpful Tips

HELP! Naps and Dicipline in 5yos
I have a 5 year old daughter as well as an almost 5 month old daughter. My oldest daughter lives with her father but i get her every ... More
Was this Helpful?
8 of 17 found this helpful

Report Problems With Your Medications to the FDA

FDAYou are encouraged to report negative side effects of prescription drugs to the FDA. Visit the FDA MedWatch website or call 1-800-FDA-1088.