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    Proposed Sex Ed Curriculum for our public school system : OMG!
    MontanaMama2009 posted:

    Kindergarten: Teach names for all body parts. ---Direct Quote: Introduce basic reproductive body parts (penis, vagina, breast, nipples, testicles, scrotum, uterus).
    ---Recognize that Family structures differ, Understand that love means having deep and warm feelings about oneself and others, recognize that people express love differently to their parents, families, and friends. Understand human beings can love people of the same gender & people of the other gender.

    Grade 1: Understand human beings can love people of the same gender & people of another gender.

    Grade 5: understand that sexual intercourse includes but is not limited to vaginal, oral, or anal penetration, understand sexual orientation refers to a person's physical and/or romantic attraction to individual of the same and/or different gender, and is one part of one's personality.

    Grade 6 - 12: this gets really graphic talking about how to have the above and what body parts can be used such as fingers, ect.

    Grade 7: Understand that Sexual intercourse includes but is not limited to vaginal, oral, or anal penetration; using the penis, fingers, tongue or objects.



    Here was my response:

    My name is Kim XXXXXX, and I am mother to three girls, ages 15, 10, and nearly 2. My older two children are currently enrolled in the XXXXX Public School System and are doing very well.

    I am writing this email to state that I am very much AGAINST the new sex ed curriculum, for these reasons stated below:

    1. We are a traditional heterosexual family, husband and wife. We teach our children from the time they are toddlers about "love," but not about our sexual acts or how to perform them.

    2. My husband and I teach our children from a young age that there are heterosexual couples and homosexual couples, and each type of couple feels the same love and devotion towards one another. Again, we are teaching "love," but not the sexual acts performed by each type.

    3. My 5 year-old female child does NOT need to understand the correct terminology of a boy's private parts, such as scrotum or testicle. She is still learning about her own.

    4. We teach, as parents, how babies are made through intercourse?but again, that is age appropriate information and very general at first, expounding in detail as the child ages and matures.

    5. My 10 year old child does NOT need to understand that intercourse can be oral or anal penetration as well as vaginal. Fifth grade is simply too young for that type of knowledge.

    6. My Sixth or Seventh Grade child does NOT need to know what body parts or objects are used for vaginal, oral, or anal penetration.

    I believe this type of sex ed curriculum is simply NOT okay, regardless of the age of the child.

    I sincerely hope this curriculum does NOT make its way into the XXXXXX public school system.
    Me, DH of 16 years, DD1 (15yo), DD2 (10yo), DD3 (nearly 2), a labrador, a tabby cat, a lop-eared bunny, and goldfish!  Life is grand!
    sbgldngrl responded:
    i hate to say it but i think this needs to be done. while you may teach your children about love/sex, many parents do not. i know the majority of parents at my school will never bring it up with their children. many of the students at my school will also wind up having sex in HS and/or getting pregnant. i'm pretty sure a few of the 8th graders in past years were already having sex or some form of the above mentioned "other" sexual acts. in this day and age the children NEED to be aware of everything. they need to know about all the STDs and that they can get them even if they aren't having vaginal sex. i also think that it is great they are explaining that it is ok if you like the same sex or if you are unsure about which way you want to go. i think that will make students more aware and understanding towards others who may not be cnsidered "normal". i would hope it would help get rid of the negative cononations of being gay or bi. i would think it might also give an "unsure" child more confidence and possibly allow them to know that they arent strange or wierd or a freak. you can always opt to have your children not participate if you do not agree but i definitely think that it is important to teach this since many parents do not.
    MontanaMama2009 replied to sbgldngrl's response:

    Maybe in 9th grade...or shoot, even the end of 8th grade year, but NOT so early.

    I will definitely pull my child from these "knowledge is power" classes, if they go through.
    Me, DH of 16 years, DD1 (15yo), DD2 (10yo), DD3 (nearly 2), a labrador, a tabby cat, a lop-eared bunny, and goldfish! Life is grand!
    gemini5324 replied to sbgldngrl's response:
    I have to say that I strongly agree with the new laws. While you might teach your children these things Kim, many parents do not. I did counseling for a teen female health center for a few years in college and you would not believe the questions that I got- like

    My BF came in my belly button, can the sperm get into my uterus through there? or My friend told me that I could douche with a bottle of soda after we have sex and I can't get pregnant, so how can I be pregnant?

    Some of the girls that came in to see me were like 12 years old and had been sexually active for a while. Now, I am not saying that all young teenagers are like this, but I 100% blame the fact that they didn't know anything about sex or alternatives to sex and were ending up pregnant. I would rather have my 12 year old using their fingers instead of their penises, that's for sure.

    I also strongly believe that children should be taught that homosexuality is normal. Like the poster said above, we need to start teaching our children that there are different ways to live other than what has been prescribed by society as "normal".

    I would rather have my children be over educated, and be able to make smart, and informed choices about their bodies and the bodies of others rather than them being left in the dark and doing something stupid because they don't know any better. So many parents today seem to think that if they don't talk about sex it won't happen, but pregancy and STD statistics scream otherwise.
    Megan, Kevin, Gabe
    Jen_FLMom replied to sbgldngrl's response:
    They may need to know it, but do they really need to know it in Elementary School? Absolutely not. I think this is completely inappropriate curriculum for children so young, especially to be teaching them about sexual acts with others before they are even taught about their own bodies and what changes will happen and why.
    DidiToo responded:
    I'd be interested in more information about the context in which these things are being taught. For example: I'd be against this being taught as a "How To" guide. If it were being taught in the context of understanding that STDs can be spread through a variety of ways, or that sexual abuse can constitute a number of things, then yes, by all means. I'd want this info before determining whether it was okay by me.

    I can see the info on sexual orientation being a hot-button trigger. I'd be for it personally, since it could reduce the bullying and horrifying isolation that homosexual teens can feel, particularly when they do not get support at home. I can see where it would clash with some people's own personally-held religious beliefs, though.
    cheeezie25 replied to sbgldngrl's response:
    Yeah, I actually agree as well. I think 10 years old seems like an appropriate age to begin learning about sex and other sex acts. In my experience, I know alot of my peers began to engage in sexual activity (though not always sex) in middle school, so introducing these concepts in 5th grade seems to be the right time to launch a "preemptive strike" so to speak on these issues. I know numerous people who lost their virginity in middle school, and one who actually became pregnant in 7th grade, so I do not think 5th gread is too early at all to discuss this important information.

    I also think it is a great idea to teach young children about different family structures at a young age. There is a small, but growing, number of children who are raised by parents in same sex relationships, and I think it is important for their peers to be educated about the ways families differ. I think even more common is having a gay aunt or uncle or other close family member or family friend, so I think teaching acceptance and different types of relationships at a young age is key. From what you posted, it doesn't sound like there would be any explicit information about the sex acts that occur between same sex couples at least until 5th grade, so I don't know why there is any issue there.

    Honestly, this curriculum seems pretty forward thinking and age appropriate in my eyes. The only thing that seems lacking is discussion about contraceptives and STDs, although maybe that is included but just not discussed in the above blurb.
    gemini5324 replied to cheeezie25's response:
    Yes, I would hope that contraceptive and STD info would be included in the curriculum somewhere.
    Megan, Kevin, Gabe
    cheeezie25 replied to gemini5324's response:
    I would hope so too. This is going back nearly 10 years, but I remember that STD info was always discussed BUT it was against policy to formally discuss any contraception except for "abstinence"... RIDICULOUS! And I lived in a suburb directly adjacent to a major city, so we aren't talking about podunkville middle america here! I actually think this was pretty standard practice across the entire US (especially during the Bush era), so it wouldn't necessarily surprise me if if contraceptives were left out of the curriculum.
    mamatobe08 replied to cheeezie25's response:
    You think 5th grade is old enough to learn about sexual acts? In 5th grade, most kids don't even fully understand what is going to be happening with their own bodies. I just think that this whole thing opens them up to new ideas, not necessarily going to worry them because at that age I don't know that they can fully grasp the consequences of doing these acts. I feel like it would be feeding them ideas of other things to do.
    jlc78 responded:
    The more I think about it, the more I don't see a real difference in when I was exposed to these things in school. In 4th or 5th grade all of the girls went to a class where mensturation/sex was discussed. The boys went to a class where the talked about their private parts/sex. Then in 5th or 6th grade, the girls went to the boys class and the boys went to the girls class. In 7th or 8th grade we had sex ed where we watched a birthing video. I think the main difference here is that they are incorporating homosexuality. And it sounds like maybe there's a little bit more detail in regards to things like anal and oral sex. Years ago these were all taboo so I just see it as keeping up with the times. I guess my question is, how graphic will they get?

    We use proper names for all body parts in our family. DS knows he has a penis and testicles. He also knows that DD has a vagina. The same goes for DD. If they are teaching kindergarteners body parts, then fine. I don't see it as an issue for me.

    Growing up I knew all of this stuff before I was exposed to these classes. And I knew most of it from my friends.

    Maybe I'm more liberal when it comes to this stuff. IDK. And maybe I'll change my mind when my kids get older.
    Me (31) DH (33) and our 2 beautiful babes DS (6/07) and DD (9/08)
    MontanaMama2009 responded:
    I guess my kids are sheltered then? I don't mind that. LOL

    I have taught my children about sex and sexual intercourse and homosexual relationships at age appropriate levels, and they have a pretty good grasp of these things at age appropriate levels.

    For instance, my 15yod knows about anal sex and that STDs can be transmitted through oral sex, but my 10yo doesn't. I think that's too early, especially when my 10yo is still playing with plastic animals and sidewalk chalk, LOL.

    I discussed things with them myself, AND purchased further reading materials in age appropriate levels. The book I gave to my older daughter at age 12 was not the same book my younger daughter received at age 8.

    And my daughters would share their books with their little girlfriends when there were sleepovers. For example, my 8yod might have her little frined sleep over and they would huddle up on the bed and read the age-appropriate book together. Whereas my older daughter would read her age appropriate book with her BFFs.

    Knowledge is power, yes. But I don't want my 10yod knowing about anal and oral sex just yet. She's still playing with sidewalk chalk and her pogo stick, like I said.

    I think it's sad that there are parents out there who don't relay information to the children or "teach" their children properly. And maybe this curriculum would help THEM? But again, I think it's just too early.

    I would like an "opt-out" on this curriculum...although truly, then all the other kids would be discussing it on the playground and my child won't be receiving the correct information...which I DON'T EVEN WANT HER TO HAVE just yet.

    Me, DH of 16 years, DD1 (15yo), DD2 (10yo), DD3 (nearly 2), a labrador, a tabby cat, a lop-eared bunny, and goldfish! Life is grand!
    DidiToo replied to mamatobe08's response:
    I think they're going to be learning them from their friends, anyway. At least, if their friends are anything like the ruffians who went to my school. ;-) I remember someone telling me about oral sex in sixth grade gym class and thinking, OMG, why would anyone want to do that in a million years. I changed my mind about it in college, but now I think my initial instinct was right, to my DH's dismay.
    cheeezie25 replied to mamatobe08's response:
    Yeah, I 100% do. Puberty often begins around that time (I know that is when I got AF for the first tiem)... hormones and confusion then ensue. I think that is around the time adolescents start to wonder about sex and everything else that comes with it, so I think it is appropriate to begin discussing the real facts out in the open rather than leave their older brothers and sister, R-rated movies, and uneducated yet "knowledgable" peers to fill in the blanks.
    gemini5324 replied to mamatobe08's response:
    There was a girl in my middle school who got pregnant in the 7th grade. I went to private, catholic school, so you can be sure that she had no idea what was going on. In 5th grade, I think I was 11 & my BFF now lost her virginity at 12. So, no, I don't think that 11 or 12 is too young to learn about sexual acts- provided that the school incorporates safety and sexual health into their curriculum.

    Kids can learn much of this curriculum in PG-13 movies. I guess I just think that it is a good idea to help kids learn about what is happening to their bodies, and that the feelings and urges they get are normal; but there can be consequences for acting on them, and they should be safe. To me, that is just better than little Johnny & little Suzy experimenting behind the gym or something.
    Megan, Kevin, Gabe

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