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Sleeping issues
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daisy729 posted:
So, Dane is starting to not sleep well and I'm starting to get at my wits end. I'm not exactly sure what is going on, my best guess is separation anxiety. I will lay him in bed, and he's very sleepy but not totally out. Most of the time he will fall right asleep, but sometimes he wakes up and screams the second I leave the room. So, I just end up sitting next to his crib and rubbing his back until he does fall asleep. AND, most nights, but not every, he will wake up in the middle of the night screaming. If I go into his room, he stops right away, and lays back down. So, I will rub his back for a minute, say good night and go back to bed. As soon as I leave the room, he screams. I have tried rocking him, staying with him until he falls asleep, changing his diaper, giving him water, singing, etc. Nothing works, as soon as I leave the room he cries.

Any ideas, advice? I'm sure this is just a stage, but I'm not sure what I can do to help him.
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MontanaMama2009 responded:
I'm not the best one to offer advice on this. We co-sleep. Well, LO co-sleeps with her big sister, but since big sis is gone, LO and I are co-sleeping.

I'm sorry for the frustration.

I understand how tired you can get and you just want your child to s-l-e-e-p!
Me, DH of 16 years, DD1 (15yo), DD2 (10yo), DD3 (nearly 2), a labrador, a tabby cat, a lop-eared bunny, and goldfish! Life is grand! http://daisyheadmamas.blogspot.com/
 
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jlynnpaine responded:
I'm sorry he's not sleeping well. Is it possible he's teething? His behavior sounds very similiar to DD's before we did the Ferber method with her. She would wake repeatedly all night long and nothing would be wrong with her. So I started going longer and longer before I'd go in to soothe her and would not pick her up, just rub her back until she was calm and then leave again. Have you tried something like that? Taking longer and longer to go in to soothe him so he learns to put himself back to sleep? It worked well for us but I know it's not for everyone. Good luck.
 
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daisy729 replied to jlynnpaine's response:
That is also a possiblity. He has all his teeth except the 2 year molars. He's been drooling and chewing a lot, so it's very well possible. I'm not brave enough to stick my finger back there, he bites hard! :)

I have sort of done something like that. I will go in right away, soothe him until he calms back down, and then leave. But, maybe I need to be more consistent with how long I wait each time.

Thanks for the idea, I'll try that out the next time :)
 
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jlynnpaine replied to daisy729's response:
Haha! Shae bites hard too. I had to switch to a real toothbrush instead of the finger brush for her because I was literally about to cry whenever I'd brush her teeth.

Maybe give teething tablets or Motrin/Tylenol a whirl first and if those don't help, try the Ferber method. I went in 5 minute increments.
 
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daisy729 replied to jlynnpaine's response:
I was doing Motrin at night before bed, sometimes that seemed to work, other nights not so much.

The last 2 nights, when I lay him down to bed he starts in crying. So, I just sit next to him on the floor, rub his back or hold his hand and sing. And, the last 2 nights he has slept all night. Not sure if that has anything to do with it or not? I guess I will see tonight :)
 
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jlynnpaine replied to daisy729's response:
Yay for two nights of sleep then. Hopefully tonight goes well. If it is his teeth, maybe they've let up a bit and he's not in as much pain. Or it could just be a fluke. Wouldn't it be nice if they could just tell us what was wrong?
 
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MontanaMama2009 responded:
Jaimee, how was sleeping last night?
Me, DH of 16 years, DD1 (15yo), DD2 (10yo), DD3 (nearly 2), a labrador, a tabby cat, a lop-eared bunny, and goldfish! Life is grand! http://daisyheadmamas.blogspot.com/
 
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daisy729 replied to MontanaMama2009's response:
Hopefully I'm not jinxing myself, but I've had 3 glorious nights of sleep...IN A ROW!! :)

Not sure if just sitting with him at night when he goes to bed has been helping out, or if he is just feeling more secure, or if his teeth aren't bothering him. But, whatever it is, I'm enjoying it while it lasts :)

Thanks for asking!
 
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jlynnpaine replied to daisy729's response:
That's great! Hope it continues for you.
 
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daisy729 replied to jlynnpaine's response:
Me too! But, it didn't :(

He woke up again last night at 1:30, so I tried something different...again.

I got up as soon as he started crying. I kept him in his bed, but gave him a hug as soon as I went into his room. He laid right back down, so I laid on the floor next to his bed, he stuck his hand out and we held hands until he fell back asleep. I got up, went back to bed, and he didn't wake up again until this morning.
 
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leftcoastgirl replied to daisy729's response:
I know you must be tired, but my gosh what a sweet sight you two must have been holding hands!! So cute!
 
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MontanaMama2009 replied to daisy729's response:
You're a good mommy, Jaimee :)
Me, DH of 16 years, DD1 (15yo), DD2 (10yo), DD3 (nearly 2), a labrador, a tabby cat, a lop-eared bunny, and goldfish! Life is grand! http://daisyheadmamas.blogspot.com/
 
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daisy729 replied to MontanaMama2009's response:
Thanks guys :)

I'm sure it did look pretty sweet, but honestly, I just wanted him to feel better so he would go back to sleep. I knew that would be the easiest way!

And, I'll be honest here...before I started on this particular board, I probably would have been a hard a** and made him cry it out. I would have thought, he needs to learn to sleep, he needs to learn to self soothe, so he just needs to figure it out. Well, you ladies have made me really think about my parenting. Sure, he does need to learn to self soothe, and I think he does a good job. But, you know what, sometimes he just wakes up scared and wants him mommy. And, how can I put the pillow over my head, turn the fan on, turn the monitor off and ignore him when all he wanted was a hug and hold onto my hand a little bit.

So, thank you for sharing what you ladies do, and believe in. It has really challenged me. I believe, no, I know, it has turned me into a better mom.
 
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leftcoastgirl replied to daisy729's response:
You probably know I like to let the co-sleeping / non-CIO flag fly whenever I can, so I'm happy that that point of view seems to dominate this particular board. And - CIO / non-CIO issue aside - I'm happy that you're happy with your parenting decisions! It certainly does help to follow your instincts and then have those instincts validated by other mommies. (It helps for me, at least!)


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