Pain Management Community

Hi and welcome here,

Thank you for sharing your story and I hope that others here will share their thoughts with you.

You also may want to consider posting on our Fibromyalgia community as food and pain is more often discussed there.

Please take suicide off your list of options. I/we do understand how difficult it is to live with chronic pain. It's important to build a support team around you and to find a way to have a life despite the pain. Read and talk on these boards for ideas and support.

Wow! Intense problem and I wish I had a medical answer for you, howerver, I am not a doctor. So whatever I say - don't take it as such. Just a friend. I do want to let you know you are not alone in your misery of living in pain constantly and battling depression over it. I assume you have a psychiatrist now? Mine is invaluable to me in keeping me looking at life from the perspective of not what I have lost but what I have to deal with now and keeping it positive. Have you thought about whether this problem may be more mental than physical? I'm not saying "it's all in your head" by any means so think it is. What I am suggesting is by looking into the psychology your relationship with food - it maybe something in eating that makes your brain say "this is going to end badly so I'm going to just go ahead and make it that way" and then your body reacts - like fight or flight reaction. It may have started out as a physical reaction but over time changed entirely to a stress reaction. I've talked to my therapist manytimes about body/mind relationships when it comes to pain. I truely believe that there is a connection to our thought process and stress reaction by the body. Just a thought but as I said previously - I'm NOT a doctor. Just someone looking for answers just like you.

Thanks so much for your reply. Yes, I have done what you suggested for many moons looking at things from every angle and being open to more. I just keep turning new rocks over as much as I can hoping one day I will be free. If not physically then spiritually though my whole being cries out for relief. Thanks again. Nice of you to take the time. :O)

That Caprice for your sweet reply. I will post on the fibro site maybe I will get more answers there. We shall see. This is most unusual problem I have I mean food is not supposed to be any enemy! :O) I laugh but it hurts to the max. I have a great sense of humor so it helps. I ask God daily to give me the will to keep doing whatever it is He allows. The day I took the pills I was not in my right mind. As I look back it was not me--I was not thinking at all. Really weird to me but it was like it was a different person because I was so depressed and did not realize the depth of it. I want to live though I cannot honestly say like this but I want to go on and never end my life. It would hurt many and besides I am not a victim. There is a much bigger picture. Blessings, Neil

Humor really is so important when dealing with pain and depression, isn't it?

Keep talking here and on the Fibro board. You're not alone.

Hi Neil,

Yeah, I do agree that none of us really wants to die. We do want to live; we just want the pain to stop, right?

I hope you're feeling better.

[TRIGGER] On May 13 1996 I could see no life in front of me and nothing but heartache behind me, i took 240 thousand Milligrams of a drug and was accidentally found and rushed to the Hospital.in the hospital i spent three months in CCU wist Cascade organ failure i had a chest tube placed in the E.D because my right lung collapsed and i was on just about every life support machine modern medicine has but as you tell by the fact i write this i'm alive and glad to be, the years between then and now have had some serious low points but have had some serious joy as well.
when i was released from the hospital i went and served 90 days in jail for "attempting suicide" and ended up joining a group of survivors of suicide and getting anew Psychiatrist who was more experienced with PTSD camp survivors/ POW's and now i would not think of trying to repeat that foolish act. Pain gives rise to depression and anxiety but i just read a study yesterday that showed that pain patients who see a therapist for CBT in both short term and long term follow up fare much better than those who don't , so do not let societys fear of Mental health and seeing a Therapist stop you Neil reach out add another unbiased support to your support team who when things look bleak you can talk to and help you sort out what we call "stinking thinking"
keep in touch let us know how you are doing and if you ever need a place to vent we are always here to listed.

Peace

Greetings
Thanks for you thoughtful reply. Wow, you went through a lot and i know you can relate to much of what I wrote about. I am fighting now literally for my life and am very disheartened. I am doing things that I know help like some exercise, ministry opportunities ( I teach a couple of weekly bible studies) and be around others as much as I can. I despise loneliness as we were never meant to be alone. Sometimes I enjoy being alone but that is different especially when I am in a lot of pain.Pain the last four months has been almost relentless and usually by now I go into a better cycle but because I haven't It is most wearing and I start to think about wanting to die. A couple of days ago was the first time I actually looked on the internet for a way to die without pain. Just go to sleep.

Yes, I have thought about who I would hurt and it would be many and that in part is why I have been battling with this for 28 years. There have been times where I have felt better for a year or two but they are far and few. I want to live really and bless the Lord and others. I love to serve God and make a difference in others lives. That brings me my greatest joy. I am very grateful for what the Lord has shown me and most of all for His love, His grace amazing grace at that. The kind of unconditional love humankind longs for. So suicide is not my first option and I wish I were not even considering it. I pray daily for God to give me the will back to live. It has not happened so much yet but I am looking to Him and believe that somehow it will come though at times in despair I don't think I can take much more. Again, thanks for your letter. Sorry you had to go through so much but I am very glad you are in a better place. Take care. Neil

Hi Beth
Don't recall if I wrote you or not! Not surprised as I have been just a mite overwhelmed and disheartened. Yes, Beth you are do right about not wanting to die but just wanting the pain to stop! Thanks for taking the time to say I hope you're feeling better. So where or what is your pain Beth. Do you care to share? Does it ever get less or better. CU Neil

Hi poet, I just wanted to know if you've looked into Celiac disease, Leaky gut syndrome?

I have very similar issues as you with severe pain after eating and have reduced my diet to only a few foods now to avoid this.
You can private message me to discuss further if you wish, but I would strongly suggest looking at rebuilding your gut flora, healing the gut with the help of a naturopath or doctor who specializes in functional medicine and definitely cut out gluten and dairy weather or not you are celiac or not - those two things and also eggs can cause damage to the intestinal lining.

Hope this helps.

I just saw this post and the first thing that came to my mind was Celiac Disease....I had it ALL my life, diagnosed just 2 years ago at 62!!!! It causes many many many symptoms due to lack of absorption of very necessary vitamins that effect our minds, and bodies. Please check into this, it could be your big answer. blessings, fibrofran