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    Sleeping Arrangement
    Prayin_4_AN_angel posted:
    So my LO is 19 months and he sleeps in my bed. He use to sleep in his crib but he would wake up anywhere between 4 and 8 times a night and scream. I am in college and my parents work so there was no way I could let him scream at 2 in the morning. I tried the letting him cry himself to sleep and after 3 weeks of him crying 2-3 hours straight then throwing up I just gave up. Now that he is walking and climbing I am considering converting his crib to a toddler bed so maybe he doesnt feel trapped and will start sleeping in his bed. I know it will be a long process but now that school is out and I have a few months I really want to get him in his bed. I understand I have started a bad habit. I would go sleep in my parents bed when I was 8 =[ I know one of the wonderful women on here has tips or possible ideas or view points on this subject and at this point anything will be greatly appreciated
    fotogirl525 responded:
    I wish I had an answer for you. I had a hard time getting my DD in her crib and she slept in a bouncy seat until a couple weeks ago (she is 17 months). Finally we moved her crib in her sisters room. Gave her a full size pillow with a Dora pillowcase. I lay her down, hand her binky to her, give her a bottle, and cover her up. She likes to be funny and raise her legs up when I try to cover her. The girls also go to sleep with the tv on. She does wonderfully. But I can't say there was a magic way of doing it. I always had a hard time letting her CIO too because we share a house with my parents as well. All I can say is good luck. I was a single mom when my two older kids were small and my son slept with me until he was 5 or 6 and then my daughter started sleeping with me (and she still tries when DH works night shift)
    DDK2005 responded:
    Ava has been sleeping in her own room/crib since 4 months. She does on occasion come sleep with us when she's not feeling well. is he in his own room or is his crib in with you? If you guys are sharing a room, he may not want to sleep on his own because he wants to be with mommy since he can see you. I know that when we go away Ava doesn't want anything to do w/ the Pack n play if its in the room with us. If you share a room maybe buy a screen that can divide the room and not allow him to see you as soon as he wakes. I understand about not wanting to wake the entire house & I also understand your frustration with him wanting to sleep with you all the time. I say go for the toddler bed with a gaurd rail & hope for the best...good luck & HTH :)
    leftcoastgirl responded:
    The toddler bed might be a helpful thing. Maybe you could lie down near him or sit with him while he falls asleep there so he's comfortable. It might be a long process to get him out of your bed, but you'll get there. And crying for 2-3 hours every night for weeks sounds like torture for both of you!! It doesn't seem like that tactic is working for you, so I'd say drop it.

    As a co-sleeping mom, I'd also suggest that you have started a habit ... but you haven't started a BAD habit with him sleeping with you. He'll move out eventually - they always do!

    I'm a member of API and read this recently - thought it might be of interest.
    ad1978 responded:
    How long ago did you last try LO in the crib? If it's been a while, you could just give it a shot--maybe he'll surprise you. Or maybe he'll cry, but not nearly as long as last time?

    Try not to get hung up on "I started a bad habit" thing I've learned from motherhood is that every habit can be changed (once you're may be hard to do or take some time, but babies are more adaptable than I had originally thought).

    Afterall, the original habit created was letting him sleep in your belly for 9 months...and he moved on from that :)

    Good luck with whatever plan you try!
    ad1978 replied to leftcoastgirl's response:
    leftcoast, interesting article!

    I only partially co-slept with LO (she was fine in her crib each night until 4am, when DH or I had to take turns laying with her in the guest bed for HOURS while she half-slept) This practice ended months ago b/c there was no way DH or I could sleep while doing this since LO kept waking up and wanting us to replace her binky (many months ago). We had to phase this out, and now she sleeps the whole night and naps on her own. We did the transition around 4 months old.

    Not to debate here, but one thing I've never fully understood is how co-sleeping in a bed is safe once LO can roll around/crawl, etc.

    I'm just thinking how high up my bed is, and once my LO became able to roll/crawl, I wouldn't have felt comfortable leaving here in my bed alone since she would likely fall out. But I wouldn't have wanted to go to bed at the early hour she does (7:30pm? that's really early!).

    I think I've asked this before, and the response from one poster was that she would leave LO alone in the bed surrounded by pillows, but that seems like a SIDS/suffocation hazard. I just feel much safer having a wiggly baby in a crib.

    Not trying to knock co-sleeping, but just trying to understand how it is done in a safe manner?

    leftcoastgirl replied to ad1978's response:
    The methods we've used have varied depending on LO's age (she's 22 months old now). First, she was either in her sidecar bassinet or on our bed with a bedrail. That way she didn't have bedding near her. Now that she's old enough to move around and can get out of the bed on her own, we do use pillows, but she's well past the SIDS age. Our bed is also low enough that she can climb out easily if she wants to.

    While would call myself a co-sleeping advocate, I do want to emphasize that you should do what's right for you and your LO. Like AD1978, I just didn't want you to feel guilty for making the choices you made. I think we mommies put too much pressure on ourselves sometimes, so I wanted to give you some encouragement!
    ad1978 replied to leftcoastgirl's response:
    Gotcha, thanks for sharing. Like I said, my bed is really high (I actually need to step on a stool!), so I wouldn't be able to sleep with LO in our bed.
    AltMomma responded:
    I know that this is kind of off topic, but to one poster that said she puts her 17 month old to bed with a a big no no..heh.

    As far as the main topic, i understand that its hard, sometimes i have to do that with my LO when he's sick (he's 14 months). I do get scared with the whole concept of cosleeping, but i am also 6 months pregnant, and being as tired as I am, sometimes i give in and let him come in the bed with me.

    I would try the toddler bed, it seems like maybe he was just really scared in his crib, who knows.
    Good Luck :D
    danimoma replied to AltMomma's response:
    i don't normally post but your comment to me came off a little judgemental.we are all moms doing the best we can and if that works for her well then that's's tough at times being a mom and we should all support each other positively that's why we come here. :)
    deal14 replied to danimoma's response:
    I agree Danimoma, I was lurking and saw Altmommas response and thought the same thing. Its hard enough trying to raise children in this day and age with or without other issues in life, lets not judge eachother when we dont fully know the situation of the child or parents.
    ad1978 replied to deal14's response:
    Are you talking about the going to bed with a bottle comment? I didn't take it as judgemental, just that she didn't know if the original poster knew that it isn't recommended (sadly, I know young children with rotted teeth from sleeping with a bottle).

    Also, I noticed that the original author hasn't responded at all, so we should probably let this thread go....
    AltMomma replied to ad1978's response:
    I wasn't trying to offend anyone, you are right ad1978, i am just aware it is not recommended.
    I support all of us as moms, but I was just trying to help..
    cdjd82406 responded:
    Try the toddler bed. As all the PP's said you will never know if it works until you try. My oldest LO started sleeping in the bed with me right after she was hospitalized with a really bad UTI. Every morning for ten days, the nurses would wake me up taking her out of my arms. They knew that it was the only way to get her to go to sleep with their cribs being so big. My son also slept in the bed with me for a while also but this was also due to him getting a really bad cold at 3 months old and he had coughed so hard that I couldn't hear him when he cried. Both now happily sleep on their own. On a side note though, I slept in the bed with my mom until after my little brother and sister arrived. My sister was about a year old when I quit sleeping in the same bed as my mom cause we moved to a different house and the master bedroom wasn't big enough for a crib. My sis refused to sleep in the same room as me. I was 12 when I quit sleeping in the bed with my mom. And when I go to visit her now even as old as I am now, that is where I sleep. Although I can't curl up to her cause she moves around too much, I have always made her sleep on the pillow that I would use just so that I could fall asleep.
    ChrisKrunch responded:
    We just moved my 18 month old son into a toddler bed this weekend. He had gotten a 57 day ear infection that ended in tubes and began sleeping in our bed. I just could not get him back in his crib. Everyone has there own ideas but I just cannot stand listening to him cry, so cry it out really wasn't an option. I wanted to try everything else I could think of before we resorted to that. I thought maybe he was attached more to the bed than to us so I figured we would give the toddler bed a shot. YEAH, I don't want to jinx myself but I think it worked. We let him help put it together and showed him how he can get in an out,. He still needs me to lay down with him to fall asleep and if he wakes up in the middle of the night. I think that will stop once he gets used to being in his room again. I think some babies get used to being out of the crib and don't like the trapped feeling especially if he has been in your bed, Why not try it if he isn't sleeping in his crib anyway?

    If you want I can tell you exactly what I did that first night?

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