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She doesn't call me Mommy
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Unconquerable posted:
Hi All,


I have a problem. I have a private babysitter that I've known since I was a child. She even kept me as a child. She's a friend of the family and treats my daughter as one of her own grands. For months now I've often wondered and have brought this up to my husband the fact my daughter doesn't call me mommy. Every so often she may say mummma muuuma but then she doesn't repeat it.

Today when picking up my daughter the babysitter shared some good news with me. My daughter ate all of her food even the veggies (yay!) But the new few words out of her mouth broke my heart into a million pieces and it took all of me not to break down. She started to imitate the things my daughter does when eating. She stated my daughter say's "MA" when she is eating and I stated "no wonder she doesn't call me mommy" I also noticed once that my daughter called her "MA" when she walked away and she answered.

How do I let her know that it makes me very uncomfortable when she answers do that term without creating awkwardness? It heartbreaking and my friends have noticed my own child doesn't call me momma but she calles my husband dada.

Help!
Reply
 
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molly88888 responded:
Does your sitter have all the kids call her Grand ma, or mamaw, and that is what your daughter is saying? or are you saying your daughter is calling her mom? Kids go through lots of things they say here and there and then they will stop. Trust me, your daughter knows who her mother is. If it were me, I would just tell her how you feel. If she is that close to you, and you have known her so long, it shouldn't create awkwardness. You should be able to tell your sitter anything that is on your mind..
 
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linzuh04 responded:
Are you sure she's not saying "MMMMMMM"? DS is 19 mos and just recently started calling me "Mama", though he's been saying it for awhile. He's been saying Dada for awhile too, but when he eats, he says "mmmmmmmmm", like the food is good. Maybe it's something as innocent as that
 
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cheeezie25 responded:
How old is your LO? Honestly, I don't think you should worry. Until kids really start talking stuff like mama and dada just tend to be catchall phrases. Sometimes my DS says "mama", but it is only when he runs to me in tears LOL. I don't get any good "mama" moments. And really, I think "mamamamama" is just something he says when he is pissed off and upset... I would really be surprised if he actually associated me with that phrase at his age. And like pp said, my DS will also go "mmmm" when eating, which could be construed as mama at times, but totally different meaning there.
 
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Jen_FLMom responded:
If it makes you feel better, my DD calls me "Grandma" sometimes. DH thinks it's the funniest thing ever...

I can tell you all day long not to let it upset you but the point is that it DOES bother you whether everyone else thinks it should or not. I understand that. My DD is watched 1-on-1 with a lady also and she has called her "Mama" in front of me before. It did sting to hear her call someone else by my name.

What did you call this woman when she watched you? Maybe if your DD hears you call her by that name she will pick up on it and call her by it too. Also, you can let the lady who watches her know that you are trying to work with DD on calling her "____________" and you would love it if she could help you with that.

I am sure your DD knows exactly who you are and before long as she gets better at using her words to associate with things and people she will be calling for you non-stop...like when you are trying to pee or talk on the phone or cook dinner...
 
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DDK2005 responded:
I agree with the pp. My daughter is 14 months old and she doesn't really refer to me as MaMa or anything at all - LOL!! Of course she looks right at her daddy and says Dada - (yeah is gets me upset). I think if its bothering you, maybe you can approach the babysitter and ask how she wants your LO to refer to her & go on from there.My DD calls her babysitter Yaya & it works for me. there are times she calls my SIL ma but I think that;s because she hears my nieces. Try not to let it get to you, she knows exactly who her mommy is - I do know how you feel though so HUGGGSSSS to you!!
Me: Dee (36), DH: Ken (36), DD: Ava 3/26/09 5lbs 15oz, 19.5 in - at 13mo chk up weighed 18.2lbs
 
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gracesmom09 responded:
I wouldn't worry about it. My daughter is 14 months. She says dada all the time but only says Mama when she is crying. She never greets me by saying Mama or anything like that. Just give it more time.
 
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Unconquerable responded:
Thank you all for your advice. By what most of you have said it's pretty normal and common for her not to say momma right now. She is 14 months so she is still learning many things. It's good know I'm not or ever have been the only one to feel this way. I'm new to the site and glad I found it given I'm the only person out of my group of friends that have a child. So no one but other moms knows how I feel.

You guys have put me at ease and thank you once again for all of your words and advice. By the way where can I find the lingo dictionary on here. Sorry but I'm not up on "DD, LO, DS or DH". lol


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