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New foster parent with a 16 month old
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fiannakyn posted:
Hi My husband and I recently were licensed to foster, and we do NOT have any children already. Well we got THE CALL today for a 16 month old boy. So expect my questions from here on out cause I have zero experience!

I am assuming he's not potty trained and probably still in a crib, and probably walking. I'll know more when I pick him up at the shelter later today.

any emergancy advice?
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orin34 responded:
oh wow............ you are amazing for taking the little guy in. As a teacher I have seen many foster children go in and out of my classrooms.
Remember that you will probably be given very limited information about this child's background. Children typically don't get taken away because of trivial disputes so there is almost always some sort of underlying trauma in addition to the fact that they were taken away from their mommy or daddy.
You never know how long a foster child will be in your care, the main thing is that you make them feel welcome and safe. Your little one will lap up all the love and attention I am sure, but if you do get an older one down the road.... generally they tend to treat kindness and love with a degree of suspicion and likely will be withdrawn and NOT want to get to know you better (if they have been in several different homes previous to yours), they do this simply because they don't want to get "attached" to someone when they will most likely be moved to another foster home again.
lol.......... that was probably more information then you wanted. Good luck with the little guy!
 
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Amelia_WebMD_Staff responded:
Congratulations and how are things going?

Please keep us posted!!
Amelia
 
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fiannakyn replied to Amelia_WebMD_Staff's response:
we survived our first week!

orin- You didnt say anything we didn't learn in the training. I feel like I'm better trained to care for troubled kids but worthless at "normal"

"sam" is adorable and very sweet natured. He does have a case of seperation anxitiy, but gets over it each time pretty easily. I think its mostly his age compounded with the changes recently. He was moved from another foster home to a shelter the night before we got him. He initialy came into care as a 3month old.

We got him enrolled at a daycare monday so he started Tuesday. They say he's the happiest baby ever
We've had to learn sceduales and finally got one down I think.
the weekend we failed misrably at the whole nap and snacks thing poor kid. But yesterday was great

he naps and sleeps GREAT. I can hear him starting to wake up when I get up, a half hr before I get him up but he doesn't fuss and is fine to doze while I get things together.
 
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fiannakyn replied to fiannakyn's response:
Amazing enough- we found his existing doctor and have an apointment with them today for a follow up from a cold he had while in the shelter, and I can finally get copies of his vaccs. The day care was very nice to let him stay while I tracked those down. MO state requires all foster children to be up to date on all vacs unless the bio parents dont want it, so we know he has them up to date.

The doc's office scedualed us with "extra time" sense even though Sam's an existing paitent, I'm a new FTM, so they know I'll have a million questions.
 
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Amelia_WebMD_Staff replied to fiannakyn's response:
Good luck to you both at the doc today!

I hope that Sam gets over the cold and the doctor is able to provide you with helpful information. Please, don't forget to update us when you can!

Take care of you and sweet Sam!!
Amelia
 
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fiannakyn replied to Amelia_WebMD_Staff's response:
his ears are cleared up (had an ear infection) and this doc says he might have reactive airway desease which basicly acts like asthma in response to illness or allergies. Which would explain the wheezing. He now has a rescue inhailer and an allergy med to help clear up his runny nose. I am not worried about the RAD 'cause my nephew has a severe case and DH has severe Asthma. He may just end up with tubes in his ears if he gets sick a lot.

We thought he was Sam's existing pead- nope. he was the one who saw Sam at 3days old in the hospital, so now we are still looking for his doc who has the history.

but this doc was happy to answer any new mom questions and gave me pointers, like why Sam was a terror all day- he cut a molar Sam's height is about 60% and weight is 50% per the CDC charts, Doc said that we were making good food choices and to keep it up.
Vicky(34), DH(34), DFS(16m) possablily adopting!, DS due Christmas Day, by private adoption.
 
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sarah0323 replied to fiannakyn's response:
Hi Vicky,
Congratulations!! I just a thought on getting what vacinations that he has already had. Here in KS anyway we have a vacination registry system. If mom would have checked the box on the birth certificate you can contact them and they can give you a copy of where and what vacinations that he has received.
 
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fiannakyn replied to sarah0323's response:
thanks Sarah- I THINk there's a database here in mo but I don't know how to access it. But the social worker was able to find Sam's current pead, and I have already called and verified he's up to date and scedualed an 18m check up. They've sent a note to the day care verifying he's up to date on vacs.

You guys can laugh at the latest couple follies on my part- the last few days, Sam has been refusing his milk in a sippy cup, he'll take a sip and then throw it on the ground. the other night DH happened to notice the date stamp on the jug. I took a sip and about choked. DH and I normally drink 1% milk, so I hadnt been testing Sam's whole milk. It had soured. Poor guy. Luckily I had another gallon I just got anyway, so I got him some of it and he sucked down almost a whole 8 oz without a break.

Then yesterday was a test day on mommy's paitents. He wouldn't keep his shoes on his feet, and I was trying to get both shoes on and him out of the car seat before he got one off. By the time we got into the daycare room, the room teacher pointed out I had his shoes on backwards :oops: He's between sizes, probably could use 5Wide but I only had 5normal and 6normal so he's been wearing the slightly too big 6s.
Vicky(34), DH(34), DFS(16m) possablily adopting!, DS due Christmas Day, by private adoption.


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