Parenting: 1-Year-Olds Community

Hello. I have a 20 month old son, who I do not believe has autism, but my husband is concerned that he may. Since I have OCD, I am worried, though I think my husband is way off base. I am hoping someone may have an expert opinion for me.

My son is very social with other children and is mommy obsessed. I am with him 24/7, and he wants to spend most of his time cuddling with me, bringing me things, being read to, anticipating peek-a-boo and tickle games or getting into things and playing. He does not cuddle much with daddy though- daddy is for playing. He has always had good eye contact, responds to facial expressions and movements, mimics, and is very interested in what I am doing. He started social smiling at 5 weeks and is very loving, giggly, and excitable.

My husband is concerned because he is not talking. He babbles and says 'dada; all the time, and can also use it correctly (calling his father or myself dada). He also repeats back the word 'done', and sometimes I can get him to say 'yes'. His understanding is good I think (he is my first child). He will give me a kiss or hug when asked. Will bring me his sippy cup, a ball, my shoes, etc when asked. He does all this with excitement for the praise he will be receiving- and will often clap for himself. He loves the attention and praise of others.

My husband is also concerned because he is very hyperactive and will throw fits when we try to hold his hand or hold him when he wants to run about a store, house, etc. He does not always respond to his name or respond when we are talking to him, but that's often when something is on the tv or he wants to get into something. He gets excited by music and bounces up and down waving his arms. He definitely flaps his arms/hands when he wants something like a cracker. He will bounce up and down waving his arms going 'uhuhuh'. I think the arm/hand flapping is because he doesn't know how to communicate what he wants with words. He doesn't point, but he waves and can follow where I point.

He saw the pediatrician at 18 months and she was not concerned. My son started walking at 8 months and has been obsessed with mobility. Since I am always with him to anticipate his needs, the doctor thinks he hasn't had the real want/need to talk yet. That is how I feel.

My son definitely likes interacting with other children and will go right up to strangers and children and start babbling with them like he wants to talk, or will mimic their laughter trying to join in.

To sum up:
My 20 month son old babbles a lot and says 3 words. He arms flaps and bounces when excited or frustrated. He does not point, but he does wave bye bye. He does not always respond when talked to. He is very hyperactive, doesn't like to be restrained in any way, has short tantrums often. Constantly wants to run around and explore/get into everything

but...:
He is super affectionate and cuddly with mommy. Likes to play with other children. Makes great eye contact. Is very interested in what everyone around him is doing. Plays with a variety of toys in a disorganized way (though he is obsessed with tv remotes). Constantly seeks praise from others.Smiled early and smiles often. Laughs a lot and loves engaging games like peek-a-boo and and anticipates tickling with delight. Will bring me things when asked. Will shut doors when asked. Loves to kiss and hug when asked. Waves and can follow a pointing finger. Movement is very refined. Walked at 8 months and now runs and dodges objects very well. Is easily comforted by cuddling with mommy. Does not mind a change in routine. Does not get easily fazed by things, but will throw tantrums often if restrained from exploring.

I am looking for responses from people with experience. Please try not to be an alarmist with guesses, as I have an anxiety disorder.

Thank you so much for your time!