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DRUG TESTING A TODDLER
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An_251943 posted:
MY SON IS 2.5 YEARS OLD AND LATELY EVERY TIME HE COMES BACK FROM HIS DADS HOUSE HE REAKS OF CIGARETTE SMOKE AND COLOGNE. FOR A WHILE NOW I HAVE THOUGHT HIS FATHER TO BE DOING DRUGS IN FRONT OF HIM BUT WITHOUT PROOF I CAN NOT DO ANYTHING. I WANT TO ADMINISTER A DRUG TEST ON MY SON TO SEE IF HE HAS ANYTHING IN HIS SYTEM BUT ALL THE RESEARCH I HAVE DONE SAYS THAT IF YOU DO NOT INHALE THE SYNTHETIC DRUG FROM THE SOURCE (PIPE, BONG, OR CIGAR...ETC.) IT WILL NOT BE IN HIS SYSTEM. I WANT TO DO A HAIR TEST ON HIM BUT THERE IS NO HAIR TEST TO DICOVER SYNTHETIC DRUGS IN HIS HAIR.
I AM COMPLETELY LOST AS OF WHAT TO DO ASIDE FROM GOING STRIAGHT TO COURT, BUT I WANT TO MAKE SURE I HAVE SOME PROOF TO SAY THAT HE IS NEGLECTING OUR CHILD BEFORE I DO THAT.
ANY AND ALL ADVICE ON THIS MATTER WOULD BE GREATLY APPRECIATED!
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jldean responded:
Hi! It is a big leap from smelling of cigarette smoke to doing drugs in front of your child, both of which might be very true especially if you already know that the child's father smoke cigarettes and do drugs. Will your child be affected by the second-hand effects of cigarette and marijuana smoke? YES! You might pay careful attention to your child's behavior, sleep and breathing patterns, etc. Smell your child's breath; look into the pupils of his eyes, observe differences in how he is walking, talking (if at all) and/or interacting with other children.

Equally, being suspicious is a far cry from making an accusation of or going to the court about your child smelling of cigarette smoke and cologne alone. If you haven't already, question your child about what he and Dad does during his visits, but be careful that you do no lead your child with your suspicion. Your child may be expressive enough to know some or all of the words used to encourage him to "smoke", or whatever. He might even be able to show you (on his own, without coaching from you) what he might be doing at Dad's if there is a pack of cigarettes lying around.

Keep in mind that just because your child smells of cigarette smoke and cologne, it doesn't mean that: 1) smoking occurs throughout his visit with Dad, but rather during the car ride home (and cologne is splashed on him upon arrival); 2) your child is smoking, or being encouraged to do so; 3) his Dad is doing drugs; 4) there is any smoking at any kind at Dad's home.

What's best is that you any other suspicions from the fact that your son reeks of cigarette smoke and cologne. What I mean is, don't add to that what isn't there. Also, if you want your suspicions to be true, they will no matter what Dad does or does not do...careful of that! Remain mindful of the importance of an open and honest, calm and adult conversation with your co-parent. Ask what you need answers to and develop some ground rules to be implemented during your son's visit with Dad (ask Dad what he thinks of them). But if you too are a smoker, the rules you set (and especially baseless suspicions) might be suggested upon you as well.

To understand the effects of second-hand smoke, visit: http://www.cdc.gov/tobacco/data_statistics/fact_sheets/secondhand_smoke/health_effects/


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