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Potty Training a bust!!
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jocelynsmom08 posted:
my daughter just turned 3 in april and still is not potty trained. shes not really interested in using the potty,and when she is she will sit for a long time and not go. I even have her in underwear during the day and for the time she wears them she doesnt go but as soon as the underwear comes off and shes in the pull up she goes. Even when shes at grandmas she is in undies, i have tried everything and nothing works..any ideas??
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FarmWife1979 responded:
I suggest putting her in underwear full time and getting rid of the pullups. She's just learned she can wait you out and you'll eventually put her in the pullup. As long as DD was in pull-ups or diapers she just didn't care about going on the potty.

DD wasn't really interested in it until just after her 3rd birthday either. Don't worry. She won't be going off to high school still in a pullup - she'll get it. Is she in a pre-school or daycare setting at all? If not, you might try putting her in a program at least part time - the peer pressure from the other kids really helped get DD interested as well.
Holly (31) DH (38) DD (3-born 11/16/07). Full-time working Mom, Wife, Library Board President, Chef, Chauffer, Maid, Toy Assembler and Repair Technician, and Chief Boo-Boo Kisser.
 
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ryanandleigh replied to FarmWife1979's response:
I tried replying to this earlier and it didn't work...here is another attempt....



I would say she might not be ready for potty training. You don't want it to be a power struggle. I would probably back off for a few weeks.

We never used pull ups but went straight to underwear. You also might buy her a doll that she can "train" while you train her. I did that with both kids and I think it helped. I pumped them full of liquids and we basically worked on potty training while playing in the kitchen - which has a bathroom nearby. The tile floor made it easier to clean up accidents.
 
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earleyml1012 responded:
I just posted this question on the two year boards but thought I'd add to to this post too.

So all of my friends with children the same age as DD or either SAHM or have a relative watch their kid while they work, meaning you guys are my only hope for some help!

First, let me say I tried the 3 day potty training camp and it failed for us. So that's not an option to try that.

Ok here goes. In the evenings we've started putting DD in underwear every night. A few times during the evening she'll make a mad dash to the bathroom saying she has to go but won't sit very long on the potty. Then a few minutes later she'll go in her pants. We can't force her to sit there, can we? However, when she's in diapers she'll hardly do this except for BMs. At daycare she's been in diapers 100% of the time and I think she's getting confused that she can go in her pants during the day but at night we are expecting her to try the potty.

So my issue is, do I just start sending her in underwear with a ton of clothes or do I wait until she starts going in the potty at home. I figure the more she's in underwear she'll get it b/c she's actually feeling wet. Those darn diapers/pull-ups she doesn't really even notice.

Any advice would be appreciated!
 
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ryanandleigh replied to earleyml1012's response:
Are you talking night as when she is asleep or just evenings when you are home? Many kids are not night trained for many months after they are potty trained. It is harder for them to get up in the middle of the night (wake up, realize what is happening and make it to the potty). I think you need consistency. If she is ready to train, then put her in underwear all the time. If the daycare is willing to help her, great. If not, start her on the weekend and see how it goes. Both my kids were trained in 2 days (not using the 3 day potty training camp but we used a book called Potty training in one day. You basically work on it all day for the first day and by the end of the day they both got it and only had a few accidents the following day.) You could also try putting a diaper over her underwear so she can feel the wetness.
 
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FarmWife1979 replied to earleyml1012's response:
Talk with your daycare provider. It's best for you to keep your DD on the same page at home and at daycare. So if you are wanting to be potty training at home, make sure they are doing the same thing at daycare. My DD's daycare didn't officially start trying to potty train with the kids until age 2.5 so I waited for them to start it, but most kids in her class weren't really completely potty trained until a little after their 3rd b-day.

Once I decided to get serious about it at home, I told DD's daycare that I wanted her in underwear except for naptime. She could have a pull-up then, just to prevent a sleeping accident. I did the same at home on the weekends. Once she was consistently keeping her pullup dry during her nap, then we went to pullups only for at night. After about 3 weeks she was keeping that dry all the time too and actually asked me if she could have underwear for at night. She only had one accident and that was because I was in the shower when she woke up in the morning and didn't hear her banging on the door wanting to go use the potty so she went before I could get to her.

DD's underwear while we were doing the hardcore training was the thick white cotton undies at Target. They have a thicker area between the legs to help absorb accidents. If the child goes, she's going to soak the underwear but she'll feel it and you might have enough time (if you are fast), to get it off before you end up with wet clothes too.

DD really only had maybe a half-dozen accidents once we went to these undies. Which tells me she really was ready to do it, she was just being stubborn and resistant. I always (from the time she was an infant all the way to today) send a full extra outfit in her backpack to daycare. During PT training I put two outfits in there just in case. I told her teachers that if she had two accidents and was down to her last outfit to put her in a diaper. We never had to get that far.
Holly (31) DH (38) DD (3-born 11/16/07). Full-time working Mom, Wife, Library Board President, Chef, Chauffer, Maid, Toy Assembler and Repair Technician, and Chief Boo-Boo Kisser.
 
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Grahambee responded:
My little guy had a big breakthrough after watching a friend of his use the big-boy potty (the regular-size one, not the little plastic toddler-size one). He just happened to be in the bathroom too when his friend peed and pooped on the potty and after that, my guy was much more interested in going than he had been.

We also read a lot of potty-related books from the library while on the potty, and my son talked about the books' characters throughout the day because he liked them so much. It got him to spend a good amount of time on the potty, so eventually he'd be successful if we read long enough.

I didn't bother with candy or stickers or star charts because those aren't interesting to my son, but flushing was his big reward after every poo or after 2 pees. He'd get so excited to flush, it was really cute. We didn't do pull-ups, just started off with the padded undies and then soon after moved to regular undies. There were accidents, but not very often, because I constantly asked him if he had to go potty. He loved going in public restrooms - the library, Walmart, grocery store - all the gross places you could possibly think of, lol. He'd ask to go potty even if he didn't really have to go, just so he could try out a new bathroom.

There are a lot of good tips here. I hope some of them help! Good luck!
Janet (40), DH (41), DS (3) and a bun in the oven, due 12/10/11.


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