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Bullies
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miob posted:
Yesterday when I dropped DS off at preschool, two boys were getting out of their car at the same time. They started yelling at him and taunting him to the point where DS didn't even want to go through the door. DS was crying and the other mom out the kids in timeout while the teacher and I got DS settled. It's been bothering me ever since. Bullies at 4 years old. Geez. I spoke to the director today and she indicated that she was aware of the incident and it's not the only instance. She said they were working with the family and they boys have targeted other kids and it's not just DS. she said the other mom was taking it seriously. I'm going to give it a few days, but DS was afraid to go to school today. I guess part of me wants to vent, but part is wondering if anyone else has dealt with this and what they did.

I suppose I'm extra sensitive around this because of DS's disability. While it's not highly noticeable right now, at some point in the not too distant future, DS will be wearing leg braces full time as I do, and what kind of bullying is he going to experience then when he's definitely going be different? Ugh. I just wish I could protect him from everything, including these bullies....
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kc_94920 responded:
I'm so sorry. We've never dealt with a bullying situation like that but there are a few not-so-lovely boys in DS's class that definately have it in them to be a bit nasty if given enough encouragement from one another.

I think the best we can do is listen, love and support our kids and ensure we do everything possible to help them develop a strong sense of self worth and a compassionate heart.
KC~ Mady (10) Logan (7.5) and Coco (4.5)
 
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seeit2 responded:
That's really hard to read. 4 years old is so young! I'd like to think the other kids have some sort of mental problem but I am not that naive. It must have been hard to hear and hard to send him back to the school.

My DD has gotten bullied because of her milk allergy. Kids wave stuff in front of her and taunt her because she can't eat it, or try to convince her that something is safe when it is not (which could kill her. It is infuriating). We have tried to teach her to shrug it off but there are many days I consider putting her in self-defense classes so she can punch those kids. It is kind of an ongoing conversation in my house because I know it is something she will have to deal with for many years. We tell her to think to herself (or say to them - but she is not a confrontational kid) "Nuts to you. I don't need that anyway" and to remember that they are not her friends and don't deserve her time. The way I see it, I have to teach her now to be mentally tough about it because it won't stop.
Esmerelda Supercalifragilistic (42) DD (6) DS (3) Just eat it, will ya
 
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baby1at35 replied to seeit2's response:
((HUGS))) You know I do not understand. I didn't even know how to be mean at these ages. It saddens me that there is bullying so early on and then scares me as the boys get older. Henry had a situation at the Y school's out program. A kid was picking on him all day calling him ugly ect. Finally Henry pretty much tackled the kid. He had enough and tried to ignore. Even the Y teacher said this kid was reprimanded all day long. Henry did not get in trouble but the other kid did. The Y teacher even said as an adult this kid would have bothered him. Who I feel sorry for is this kid that doesn't know how to act any different.
He didn't bother Henry anymore I do not condone what Henry did and we talked about better ways to handle it walk away, ignore, tell the teacher ect. But it seems this kid didn't stop no matter what. He did after Henry tackled him though. The martial arts is paying off I guess .
But bottom line is we have to teach our kids to have a great self esteem. Support them and keep the lines of communication very open so they can talk to us.
Me (43) 2 busy boys 7 yrs and 6 yrs
 
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miob replied to baby1at35's response:
I wouldn't condone it either, but a small part of me would be cheering if Owen reacted the same way as Henry. I've told him to make the teachers aware if the boys are making him feel bad. Then I asked him what kids from his class he likes playing with. Then I told him that was great and to play with those kids and stay away from the other two.

Owen said he had a good day yesterday and the teachers agreed. They are trying to encourage him to speak up when the boys are doing something he doesn't like instead of just to start crying and he's making some headway there. I'm glad they're teaching him coping skills, but I really wish he didn't have to learn them so early.


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