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My 8 month old likes her grandma better than me!
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jaime101510 posted:
I live with my parents right now, but I'm the one that is with her and taking care of her 24/7 (except the weekends when she is with her dad). Well, my daughter LOVES my mom...which is great, until she started calling her "mum mum" and squirming out of my arms every time she sees her grandma. She will whine and race to her until she is in her arms. My mom is getting a kick out of it (especially being called "mum mum"- she likes to encourage it too, despite what I say). My mom also spoils her to no end, like picking her up at the slightest whine, even when I tell her not to. It's so frustrating.

I can't help but feel hurt and jealous of my mom. I'm sure it's normal and whatnot, but I do not want to feel any form of resentment towards my daughter Please tell me someone is in my shoes? Any avice would be appreciated.
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hppyw3 responded:
I lived with my mom after i had my first child for awhile too. She would feed my daughter stuff we were eating when i didn't want her to because she was too little. I would get so angry. I finally put my foot down when i say no that meant no, i asked her how she would have felt if someone done that to her when she had me. She said she wouldn't do anything that would hurt her. My mom would pick her up at every little cry and she wouldn't whip her or smack her hand when reaching for something she wasn't suppose to (and my husband wouldn't either) i would be the one to do it. My daughter is 4 now and runs all over my mom and husband but when i say i want something done by her she does it and I'm respected.

with my mother-in-law (she calls her nanny and she doesn't live with us) she favors her over me when she is around. It really hurts My Moms feelings because she is around more than her nanny (mother-in-law) and we all live in the same town. I was watching one day and my 4yr old can get a little rambunctious, the only thing my M-I-L would say is "I'm telling your mommy and do you want a whoopin?" Her nanny picks her up at the slightest whine and she wont whip her and my daughter knows that, so she can get away with anything. On the other hand i do whip her and so does my mom "now". Your mom is going to "soak" it up but she will grow out of the mum mum part find another name for her to call her. my kids call my mom mam maw. Your daughter is going to go to the person that "babies" her but in the end she will always need her mommy and you will be there. My pediatrician also told me to let my mom do what she wanted because she is going to be there for me when no one else will. So don't be jealous be happy that you have a mom there to love her and spoil her because she wont be here forever. Hope this helped a little
 
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bumbolina responded:
Wow, I am having the Exact same issue right now--and I'm happy to see that one other person is experiencing this as I have been told this is VERY uncommon.

I am home with my daughter 24/7 and my mother lives about 30 minutes away from me. My daughter sees her about twice a week, but each time she does, she only wants grandma. As you said, she squirms to get out of my arms until she is with her grandma and it really hurts my feelings. Of course my mom loves it and continuously says, "wow, she loves her grandma so much" and it just makes it worse for me. I am in exactly the same situation and I too am looking for advice. Will this "loving grandma more than mom" pass? Or, is this what it will be like from now on? Is this normal?

As above, any advice would be Greatly appreciated as well.
 
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Newdaddytoo responded:
Did she pick you up like that when you were a baby? You should ask her.
 
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jadedstar responded:
I am currently living with my mom and my daughter 8 loves her na na. when she was small and we lived next door i swore she loved my mom more but she didn't she just has a different relationship with her than me and yes she got away with everything. NOW that we live there and i now have a 8 month old lil boy I work full time and my mom babysits for me (am on a waiting list for daycare) He has his moments where he only wants na na its not that he loves her more he is with her more but he has moments where it is all about ma ma ma too. Its hard and i deal with depression so when i been working all day and get home and he only wants na na she takes him of course but its hard and I feel for you but I KNOW from experience with my 8 yr old and i have to keep telling myself too tho.
Babies have their own personalities even when tiny and sometimes na na or maw maw or grangran is who they want and i pick him up if he cries but none of us pick him up if its just a lil whine not now with him being bigger but when he was itty bitty we all did so he is spoiled they get spoiled quick. and for the other poster i think your lil one is excited to see grandma BE glad she loves her gran its a great bond between a grand baby and a loving grandma.
my now ex M-I-L has seen my daughter very few times in her 8 years and she choose to not be in her life when my daughter was young and as she got older her grandma wondered why my daughter didnt like her well she didnt know her thats why its sad but true.

origianl poster..Please dont resent your daughter for loving her gran do put your foot down about the mum mum find a another name we went with na na like ma ma but lil different and it worked for us your daughter has you all day long and loves you but kids can get bored and a change of pace is good for their developement my 8 month old even has times where he gets bored with my mom and my step grandma stayed with us for a while because of health issues but he got passed around to everyone because each person plays and entertains him a little bit different. It does hurt us mom's feelings when they want someone else but they always come back to mommy and they dont love others more than us its just different than us and i honestly believe That the more people that Love them the better and I know its hard to share that LOVE but the heart has bounderies and a childs love is endless Be thankful that gran gran loves them because some grans dont or act like they dont and the babies are the ones that get Hurt.

Cherish all the moments you can with your babies and be gald they have multiple people to Love them. HOPE I helped a little i think my post became a rant LOL i tend to go on to much GOD BLESS and Be patient becuase NOTHING compares to a moms love! and nothing is like a grandmas love but the two are different in many ways. okay im done


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