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Helicopter Daughter-in-law
Retired33 posted:
Grandaughter is seven, DIL is 30. From the time GD was born everytime I babysit Mom would hoover over GD until she cried, then she would leave. Although my GD is seven Mom still does this and Gd cries. This is really upsets me. Any suggestions? She also does this when she takes her to school.
FCL responded:
Have you ever asked her bluntly why she does this? The hovering, I mean, not the making the child cry.
Retired33 replied to FCL's response:
not in a blunt way, just hinting at it, when I have offered advice she has never taken it. I try to stay out of my childrens lives, not offer to much unwanted advice. I just don't feel good about this. They will only have one child. My DIL and GD are Jehovah's witnesses too so we have holiday and birthday issues too. Although we work that out pretty well. DIL has lots of good points, but she is really clingy with my son and GD. If she brings it up I will be blunt, but I don't want to lose time with my GD cause I made her Mom mad. A fine line to walk.
FCL replied to Retired33's response:
If she's clingy with all of those she loves and not just her daughter the chances are slim that she'll change no matter how good your advice. You never know, one day your GD will perhaps say "Mom, will you let me BREATHE!" :)

You've probably already tried this but ... How about bringing a game next time you babysit and involving your GD fast, before her mother can start hovering? If you can get her engrossed in something maybe her mother would hesitate to interrupt?

Good luck.

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