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10 year old daughter starting too young
An_222258 posted:
So, my 10 year old daughter has been "blosoming" for some time now, and I never made much of an issue out of it. I've been doing a lot of research on line and talkin with some friends and family to figure out the best ways of approaching the disscussion of sex/ puberty and her body. I have to admit, my otherwise straight forward parenting with her, is not working here. Every time I want to talk to her about it, I keep thinking she's to young and this can't be happening, and then I look at her again and think, omg this is happening.. I'm in trouble.. I guess the questions I have are, when should I talk to her about sex, is it important to include in the "talk". Is her attitude normal for a budding young lady? (irratic moodswings, aggravated behaviors, temper tantrums, and constant need to "mother" everyone and everything?) And should I be what should I be looking for if she doesn't first come to me with questions on her 1st cycle? And is 10 to young? I guess I'm at a loss and just need some help here.. She's my first born and this is uncharted territory for myself and my husband. Any advice would be great!!

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phoenix31674 responded:
Due to high fat diets and environmental chemicals, girls are maturing faster.

This might be a good time to take her to your pedi if you haven't. She might like hearing some info on her development from her doctor. and you can find out if the mood swings and such are normal. I expect they are as her hormone shift and flux.

anyway, you should definitely have the talk with her. There are books out there that can help you keep it age appropriate, but kids are becoming sexually active earlier and earlier, so this is not something to be avoided. Even when girls were 12 and 13 when having their first periods, parents were still putting off the talk and accidents were happening.

Good luck to you.
Laura2910 responded:
Regarding the birds and bees talk, we actually started having this talk with all four of our kids all at once, one night when we were having a camp-out in our basement. One of the boys asked a question about "boobies" and laughed, and opportunity just presented itself so we got into some detail about love, body changes, and babies. Our kids were 9, 9, 7 and 6. I was so glad we did (although it was a little uncomfortable, my husband did great at keeping it pretty light). The kids asked questions, and we answered them. Today (two years later) they've asked questions as they've had them, and have felt comfortable asking. We've gone into some more detail with the older ones, who are now starting to go through some changes.

So, in my totally non expert opinion, I wouldn't make it too formal. I'd start small, so you don't scare her, and follow her lead. Try to keep things informal so she's comfortable asking questions. Rather than schedule a "meeting" I'd bring it up sometime when she's extra chatty in the car or something - look for a good opportunity for a two-way conversation, which can be hard to find sometimes at this age!!

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