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My 6 year old is peeing in his room
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An_242973 posted:
My 6 year old, soon to be 7 year old in about 2 months is peeing in his room. He is potty trained, has been for years. Couple of months ago, we realized that he was peeing in a corner of his room...for about a week. Clearly, it had been multiple times. We made him help clean it up --- which he did not like at all. In fact he was very, very upset with the smell in his room. He cried because his room smelled like pee! We scrubbed the carpet 3 or 4 times by hand, then I used the carpet shampooer twice — and fabreez — finally knocked the smell down. We explained that we pee in a toilet. Thought since he seemed so offended by the odor that he would never do this again! Wrong! HE is 6 --- and he clearly knows peeing in a corner, on the carpet is WRONG! The behavior stopped and it did not happen again until tonight. He finished dinner and was told to go upstairs and put his PJs on --- instead he peed in his brother's room...and in his room, in the same corner. His underwear was found in the corner completely soaked...it appears he took off his underwear, threw them in the corner and peed on them! He initially denied it, he repeatedly denied it -- but through conversation he assured me that he put on clean underwear before bed --- So finally, I asked how the underwear he wore today ended up soaking wet in the corner...ultimately I made him look me in the eye and just told him I knew he was lying to me and I wanted to know what happened. He came clean, finally. BUT --- I don't understand WHY? I cannot get him to tell me WHY or provide any reason. HELP! This is so frustrating. The corner he is peeing in…is literally 2 steps from the bathroom, in fact some pee splattered on the bathroom tile --- he is that close. And it is HIS bathroom. We have 5 baths/toilets in our house…and 3 upstairs --- just no reason for him to peep in a corner in his room. Clearly there has to be some explanation — anger?
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momuv4girls responded:
Yes, I agree, there is something deeper going on here. Clearly your son knows how to use the toilet, but is choosing not to.

Your son may not even really know why he is doing this either. Children have a hard time getting to the root of their feelings.

You don't mention any family dynamics here.......

Is HIS father in the home? Has there been a divorce? Has there been a recent death? Have you moved lately? Has he switched schools? A new baby in the home? Does he go to daycare?

I think its super important to look at your son's environment from HIS eyes. Some children are more sensitive than others, and obviously something is going on......

My first step would be to meet with his pediatrician and have a discussion about what has been happening, and then go from there.

Take care !
-Kathleen
 
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fiannakyn replied to momuv4girls's response:
I dont have any advice on the action but I do have some ideas for the smell.

There is a thing called "OderBan" that is sold by the quart and Gallon at hardware stores and SAMs. It's the active ingredient in Lysol. You dilute it with water and then soak the area after shampooing it. Let it dry and repeat a few more times for really nasty smells. I used it when I had an elderly cat that had kidney infections so would go on carpet. The directions said to mix to 1 cup solution with 3 cups water. I actually did 1cup to 1cup for the really nasty areas.

if he's peeing on clothes or blankets or towels- run them through the washer like normal, but then rewash with a small squirt of Dawn dish soap and a cup of white Vinigar (you can put the vinigar in the fabric softener dispencer) There will not be a vinigar smell at the end I promise.

Hope you get it figured out soon!!
Vicky
 
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2012playball replied to momuv4girls's response:
No nothing I can think of -- his father is in the house. We are married and have been for 14 years. No new school. No new baby, my youngest child is 4 years old. Have not moved lately, been in our current house since before he was born -- about 8 years. No deaths either. He goes to before/after school care -- this is not new either. He is a first grader...and he went to before/after school care last year too. He is a middle child -- I have an older daughter who is 9 and the 4 year old as mentioned.

Upon cleaning his room this weekend, I found another spot... it was where his bunk bed bumps up against the wall. I had slid a lamented poster behind his bunk bed"026and it literally had pee about half way down the poster — dried now. I made him help clean up the carpet and the poster. He denies peeing"026.but inadvertently admits to his guilt. When I had him clean the poster"026he said, "I only peed on the edge of it"026and it was only on one side." And while cleaning the carpet he was upset about having to clean it (and the fact he was not allowed to play with a friend)"026.I reminded him that the last time this happened, he was told that if it happens again he will lose privileges. He responded, "but I forgot."

Clearly, he is peeing on the carpet. I just don't know why. I hardly trust him to move freely about the house"026he is peeing in his room, peeing in his brother's room"026it is such a stinky mess to clean up after it has dried"026ugh.
 
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Elizabeth_WebMD_Staff replied to 2012playball's response:
Hi 2012playball,

I hope you have been able to touch base with his pediatrician as Kathleen suggested.

You may want to talk with his teachers and before/after care workers to ask if anything is going on and ask if he is having problems with other kids. Also, ask about his bathroom routine during the day. Is he going to the bathroom or holding it all day?

I agree that this is disturbing behavior and finding what's triggering this may take some time. Please let us know what you find out ofter talking with his doctor.

Hope you find answers soon,
Elizabeth
 
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PMofTwo1983 responded:
I just found this because I was seaching for why my six year old daughter is doing this same thing! It's incredibly frustrating. We dont have carpet but its been on blankets pulled off her bed and even in her closet on stuffed animals. It happened months ago but i just went to do laundry and it has happened again. My daughter was diagnosed with ADD and behavioral defiance disorder but when asked why after finally admitting it (blames it on cats- this is human urine not feline) she will make up excuses that are just silly. She is aware of what she is doing as well by why I can not figure out. If you ever found out any information I would love to hear it! Thanks
 
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lvanroo responded:
Did you ever find out the root reason why your son is/was doing this? I have a 9 year old doing the same and has for years. My husband and I adopted him and his half brother from the foster system and he has done this in prior place,nets but never when he was with his bio mom. He did it a few times, too the point were we could keep up with the smell/stains in our house in California. We moved to Texas 6 months ago and are in an apartment, his room reeks.

Tonight I was standing at the end of the hall telling his older brother to turn out his light when I heard my 9 year old peeing in his room. I ran into his room, saw the wet spot asked him why he did it and he said "did what?" I made him put his hand in the wet spot to make sure it was wet, sure enough it was. I told him t go wash his hands and finish in the toilet.

Any thoughts??
 
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busymama619 replied to lvanroo's response:
My 6 yr old has started doing this (again). He did it the summer he turned 5. His dad is in the Navy and had back to back deployments. Now we just moved for the first time away from the home they've always known to another state and it started back again. I'm having a nervous breakdown because since his 3 yr old sister sees all the commotion over it she has started! We got him into counseling and basically she said it's his way of controlling his environment since he can't control when Daddy leaves, or that we can't go back to CA, and that he's overwhelmed. Because when I try to talk with him, he denies it, and his face goes blank. I tried yelling, punishing, bribing, begging, crying, calm talking. Nothing works. I am working every day not to lose it. He needs me to show him that I can be in control and show him he's safe and how to respond to turmoil.And also if I stop making a deal about it in front of sister, I'm sure she ll stop. But I'm literally getting migraines daily and crying. He pees eveywhere! I am constantly cleaning the carpets! And yes, if he's home when I find it I make him help. I checked out books at library on kids with anxiety, I hope I'll get some answers on how to make this stop. If any of you had luck with things that works, please let me know.
 
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momuv4girls replied to busymama619's response:
If I were you, I'd start counseling again with a really good Child Psychologist.

Sounds like he needs professional help in dealing with his stress/anxiety. A good psychologist will work on parenting strategies with you, along with helping your son.

Take care!
-Kathleen
 
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stellagonzalez responded:
Counselling as well as your love and support is must. So that they would easily come out from this situation.
 
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sallyanndizon replied to stellagonzalez's response:
Has anyone gone for professional help and gotten any answers about inappropriate urinating in the house? Our grand daughter just denies it and refuses to talk.
 
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momuv4girls replied to sallyanndizon's response:
How old is your Granddaughter? Has there been any life changing events for her? Divorce, death, move, new marriage of parent etc....?

There is help out there for young ones - - more info would be helpful.

-Kathleen


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